back to article Chicken fillets: The affordable alternative to Bulgarian Airbags

Women wanting the protection of Bulgarian airbags in a car crash situation, but wary about going under the knife will be reassured that a couple of pairs of chicken fillets makes an ample substitute. The road safety breakthrough is reported in the Daily Mail, which recounts the heartwarming story of a 28-year-old Scots woman …

COMMENTS

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  1. Velv
    Paris Hilton

    Whate a shameless excuse for an article.

    More please :)

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Chicken fillets ...

    ... so that the chick can fill it?

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Hmm, looks like an interesting story... oh, what? No ... no, I don't want to take a survey thanks, sliding feedback box that just obscured what I was trying to read. Ahh, closed. That's better. Whaaa? 10 seconds into the reading and ... another pop-up box inviting me to take a survey? Meh, sod it. Can't be bothered <closes article and goes to another site>.

    Sad to see El Reg descending down the slippery slope of intrusive pop-up/slide-in adverts that obscure the content until you are forced to dismiss them. I'll be enabling adblock plus on the Register from now on... I'd held off until now because it's a good read often as not, but after two annoying pop-ups in 10 seconds, I'm nuking all your ads, grrrrrr.

    1. Ugotta B. Kiddingme

      must just be you, mate

      I don't recall EVER seeing a pop-up from El Reg.

      1. M Gale

        Try turning ABP off.

        Those awful iframes and popup DIVs on this very site are exactly why I installed that lovely little Firefox plugin. Adverts don't bother me, but flying, animated, expando-shit does.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Thumbs up from this desk

    As a career Algol and C# developer I have found these to be a totally invaluable innovation. I have a little shudder thinking back to the days before these little life savers became widely available. Keep up the good work.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Titus Technophobe

      Is an anagram of 'He chops but one tit.'

      I suspect this is no coincidence.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Childcatcher

        Freak coincidence

        Gadzooks, my somewhat throw away comment has insulted a 32A cup, C# and Algol programmer. There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio…… now that one I didn’t expect.

  5. Thomas 4

    El Reg

    Always keeping us abreast of the news.

  6. Kubla Cant

    Ugh!

    Were the fillets raw or cooked?

    Breast, thigh or (perish the thought) wing fillets?

    Don't they tend to emit a smell of rotten meat after a fairly short time?

    1. perlcat
      Holmes

      Hmmmm.

      You live absolutely, totally alone, don't you.

      So very sorry.

  7. b166er

    'violent rainstorm on a notorious stretch of road'

    'I was driving home from work, stupidly not wearing my seat-belt, when I lost control of my car and crashed on a slippery wet road.'

    Friends, family and those she worked with at Aviva Insurance

    Crikey!

  8. won

    Misdirection

    She wasn't wearing a seatbelt.

  9. Isendel Steel
    Coat

    Pictures...

    ..or ...

  10. Anonymous Coward
    WTF?

    Why wasn't she charged?

    As far as I was aware, not wearing a seatbelt is a criminal offence, so why aren't the police charging her?

    must have been clear from the injuries that she had not been wearing the seatbelt.

    Oh yeah "boo hoo I'm a hurt girly who brought this on myself through crap driving, not wearing a seatbelt and I'll cry and cry till you feel sorry for me"

    Another liability that should be NOWHERE near the controls of a car

    1. Old Painless
      Angel

      ?

      what an angry little man - i presume you are an exemplary driver, and have saved countless lives with your selfless and highly skilled road use? what an example you are to all of us!

      1. KroSha
        WTF?

        @ Old Painless

        What's that got to do with it? She's obviously a bloody liability on the road and if she's that cavalier about her own safety, I hate to think what it's like to be a road user near her. The roads are dangerous enough without self-confessed fools making things worse. And yes, I am angry, having been crippled by a half-asleep bint in a RTA earlier this year.

    2. Geoff Thompson
      Pint

      ?

      What tells you she was not wearing a seatbelt? Anyway, I saw the headline, knew it would be silly but could not resist anyway. It is Friday, after all. Pint, because it is Friday.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        What tells us? She told us herself (via the linked DM article)

        In the Daily Mail article linked from TFA, it says `She said: 'I was driving home from work, stupidly not wearing my seat-belt, when I lost control of my car and crashed on a slippery wet road."'

        AC because I'm implicitly admitting to following a link to the DM.

  11. Iain 25
    Paris Hilton

    As they say on That Interwebnet ...

    "Pictures or it didn't happen."

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/2011/11/11/boob-enhancers-saved-my-life-claims-young-mum-after-horror-car-crash-86908-23553880/

      as long as she didn't speak I would...

  12. Graham Marsden
    Thumb Down

    "The unfortunate lass lost control of her car in the treacherous conditions"

    "Unfortunate"? Or was is that she lost control because she was driving *too fast* for the "treacherous conditions"?

    The recent tragedy on the M5 shows the dangers of driving too close together and too fast for the conditions, yet still idiots do that and then consider themselves "unfortunate" when they get involved in accidents.

  13. Craig 28

    Damn it

    Too stupid to wear a seat belt, works for an insurance company and now she's getting fake boobs? Damn it there was me almost curious what she was like, having a soft spot for scottish girls and everything, even with a triple-A figure. Ah well, guess nowhere has a 100% hit rate for appealing women.

    No I'm not a perv, I'm a similar age to the girl in question... just a lot more grown up than most people my age, never mind this dippy bat.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    ?

    "According to the Mail Lisa Somerville was driving in a "violent rainstorm on a notorious stretch of road" near Glasgow while wearing a double set of "chicken fillet" bust enhancers in her bra. Somerville had regularly "doubled up" since her teens to augment her otherwise AAA figure."

    What's her credit rating got to do with it, despite being better than Italy's?

  15. Babai
    Boffin

    Boobs - Bombs - Babes

    Baby I love this job!

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