back to article Chinese teen flogs kidney to buy iPad

A Chinese teenager desperate to get his hands on an iPad allegedly sold a kidney to raise some fondleslab funding. According to various news reports, 17-year-old Zheng travelled from the city of Huaishan in Anhui Province to Chenzhou in neighbouring Hunan Province, after hooking up with an internet intermediary. Zheng …

COMMENTS

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    One kidney? That's nothing(*)

    Jobs sold his soul to keep the company going.

    (*) Depends on the current kidney to soul conversion rate.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    in other news

    Steve Jobs returns to Apple following a successful kidney transplant.

    1. ratfox
      Pint

      Aaaand that makes 50 upvotes!

      Have a cold on me, too.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Fixed...

    "Zheng's health is now reportedly suffering as a result of his torso being cut open by someone with no medical expertise wielding a dirty butter knife."

  4. DJV Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Now that's dedication...

    I vote that we honour him with the title "Fanboi Supreme" (well, until someone donates their heart in exchange for an iPad, anyway).

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Facepalm

      Well ......

      they already sell there soul to the devil when they buy a iproduct, so why not follow with a heart !!

  5. Z 1
    Gimp

    Idiot

    Idiot fanboi.

  6. Simbu
    Coat

    Dialysis

    Is there an app for that?

    1. Dave 64 Silver badge

      RE: Dialysis

      Are you taking the piss?

  7. hplasm
    Gimp

    At least he still has one left.

    In case he wants to joint the Scientologists as well.

  8. Ian K
    Coat

    'returned home bearing "a laptop and an iPhone"'

    There has to be more to it than that. A kidney for an iPhone, that's a fair enough as an exchange.

    An Apple laptop, too, though? Surely one of those costs an arm and a leg?

    I'll be here all week.

  9. AlgernonFlowers4
    Childcatcher

    Bargain at half the price

    Should really have cost him an arm and a leg!

  10. Ian Davies
    WTF?

    Cue bullshit accusations of Apple fanboi...

    ...in 3... 2... 1..

  11. George Nacht
    Stop

    Please, tell me...

    ...that this is just a hamfisted attempt to rehash an old urban legend.

    Because if it is true, then we as species are five minutes late to extinction event.

    Apple or not, fanboi or whatever, this is just so .... wrong.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Unhappy

      I thought the urban legend

      ...was someone waking up in a bathtub having been drugged and their kidney removed without their consent.

      Someone willingly selling a body part for money doesn't seem nearly as much of a stretch, In the US, AFAIK, it is illegal to get compensation for something like this - it *has* to be donated... but even here I would be surprised if money changing hands under the table has *never, ever, ever* happened since you do get to pick - in an elective donation where the donor is still alive - who gets your body part. It's only for donations where the donor is dead where the recipient is picked - not sure by who exactly, but definitely not the donor's family - who gets the parts.

      This is the part where I whistle instead of making a crack about where Jobs got his liver from.

      Agreed that it's horribly, terribly wrong... just don't think this type of thing is neither nearly as uncommon as we might like to believe nor, unfortunately, urban legend territory.

  12. Andrew Moore
    FAIL

    Errr....

    and after all that he didn't even get an iPad.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Prepare the drums

    That was a piss-poor decision.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Joke

      Missed opportunity

      A poor-piss one, shurely?

  14. Mitch Kent
    Joke

    This would be a funnier story if...

    ...he'd done it for a Wii

  15. Jean-Paul
    WTF?

    So what...

    he did it (reportedly) out of free will. What is the big deal.

    1. Jedit Silver badge
      Gimp

      You forgot to add...

      "Posted from my iPhone"

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Free will?

      In China?

  16. Frank 2
    Pint

    monorenal

    I misread that but it still made sense, v.g.

  17. Erroneous Howard

    Re:Cue bullshit accusations of Apple fanboi...

    Indeed - after all he only sold ONE kidney.

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    iPad 3 = no kidney?

    What happens when Apple update the iPad (as they're bound to do to keep the cash cow flowing) will he sell the other kidney? I wonder if you can hook up an iPad to a dialysis machine.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    WTF?

    Indeed...

    Jeez, I want a new Canon 5D but bugger me there are limits! I suppose you could take the Blackadder/Baldrick route ( "I've heard there is cash to be made down the docks, ermm, doing favours for sailors. Good looking bloke like you, nice legs!" )

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Gimp

    Question

    How long does he have to live to avoid winning a Darwin Award??

    (If only all fanbois would remove themselves from the gene-pool in this way)

    Can you actually get GIMP on an Apple product???

  21. Cyberelic
    Pint

    I had a kidney removed, not long ago.

    Done properly, NHS and all that. The surgeon commented it was 'all black and nasty inside'. But the other one is still working after a fashion. I now have 20% of my kidney function left.

    Not to be done lightly, removing kidneys, the fanboi I feel will regret it. If he survives...

    The bottom line, some severe dietary restrictions. No more beer of any sort for a start, nor serious coffee... (It's the potassium that gets you, you can't get rid fast enough, then the K kills your heart)

    Raised glass - of Earl Grey tea, no milk, with 2 tabs of Sucralose. (Sigh)

    P.

    1. defiler

      That's pretty-much what I thought

      I'm sure if the lad has one fully-healthy kidney it won't be so severe, but he'll still have to watch his intake very carefully, and even then has likely lopped a few years off his lifespan.

      A few years of all the joys (and otherwise) that the world has to offer, or a portable telly you can tickle? Not really a hard choice. Makes me feel a bit sad for him.

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Yum yum

    Another dubious Chinese delicacy?

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Instead of a kidney...

    ...half a liver? Reportedly this one grows back.

    Piss-poor decision, indeed.

    Don't try to figure out why the blood stains on the coat are so dark.

  24. TonyHoyle

    Title

    "Can you actually get GIMP on an Apple product???"

    Yes but GIMP OSX is absolute shite.. you have to click twice to make anything happen, there's no screen capture functionality and copy/paste doesn't work.

    Most of this is because it was just recompiled using the X11 layer rather than being integrated in the UI in any way.

  25. M H
    Facepalm

    erm... where's the iPad???

    Pre-op: "I wanted to buy an iPad 2 but could not afford it"

    Post-op: returned home bearing "a laptop and an iPhone"

    So, he didn't even buy the iPad???? Tosser.

  26. Cliff

    Still got one kidney left...

    So he can get an iPhone 5 and iPad 3.

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Angel

    Ipads are really that expensive?!

    You've got to be kidneying.

    AC...

  28. LaeMing
    Thumb Down

    A fool and his internal organs...

    ...are soon parted.

  29. Rich 11

    Globalism

    > * Details vary, according to which source you're reading, which is often the case with news from China.

    Or indeed with the British tabloid press.

    I hope the Chinese aren't learning that particular approach from us. China deserves better. Much, much better.

  30. John Tserkezis
    FAIL

    Holy crap.

    I've seen some real morons on usenet, no, that's too nice, their elevator doesn't go to the top floor, a couple of volts below threshold, two tacos short of a combination plate, you get the idea...

    But this kid makes them look like outstandingly intelligent members of the community.

    I *would* have said he'd be better off than Darwin award winners, as he managed to get a iPad 2, iPhone and a laptop before he dies a slow and painful death.

    No wait, the (at least?) two apple products means he's destined to go directly to hell.

    Do not pass go and all that.

  31. David Pollard

    Viral marketing?

    The hardest part of this despicable trade must be in contacting the punter who needs a spare part and who is prepared and able to bribe to obtain one.

    Hopefully the Ministry of Health's recent 'nationwide campaign to crack down on illegal organ transplants' is more than a pretense of respect for human rights.

    http://www.chinadaily.com.cn/china/2011-04/19/content_12349161.htm

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Pint

    What It's Like To Own An Apple Product

    http://theoatmeal.com/comics/apple

  33. Alistair MacRae

    How long before Foxconn gets wind of this?

    Once they find out they'll be harvesting their employees kidneys after they sign their new contracts.

  34. NomNomNom

    titleplease

    iKid(ney)youNot

    hahaahaha

  35. Evil Auditor Silver badge

    Yes, but...

    What did he get when he sold his brain earlier on?!

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