back to article April Fools Day's Finest

We hate April Fools Day. It makes story writing here at Vulture Central extra difficult, sifting through the endless fictional nonsense trying to find something interesting - and true. However, sometimes the gags can be quite amusing. Here are a few I've stumbled across on my story surfs today. Facebook Status Display T-Shirt …

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  1. Pahhh

    NetApp purchases EMC

    Rather dull April's fool....

    http://www.storagenewsletter.com/news/business/netapp-to-acquire-emc

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    what about

    gmail motion

    http://mail.google.com/mail/help/motion.html

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Someone sent me this job posting from Google too

      http://www.google.com/intl/en/jobs/uslocations/mountain-view/autocompleter/index.html

    2. Shades
      Thumb Up

      The motion guide...

      ...looks like a dance routine to me! :)

  3. adifferentbob

    You missed -

    Google's GMail Motion - they even have deadpan videos.

  4. Dave Murray

    My fav - MotoGP + F1 to Merge

    http://motomatters.com/news/2011/04/01/f1_and_motogp_to_merge.html

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Wikipedia front page

    Featured article was named "Fanny scratching". SFW - honest

  6. GarethB

    Angry Nerds

    http://www.atlassian.com/en/angrynerds

  7. This post has been deleted by its author

  8. Michael C
    Thumb Up

    ThinkGeek wins

    Simply on the level of effort they went through to build what many a fanboi might ACTUALLY buy. I have a few apple gadgets, but I'm no fanboi and this would not make it past the threshold of my home, but I know people who would buy this for their kids in a heart beat if it was real. The design (real or rendered?) is awesome, and if it wasn't April 1 I would have assumed this was real. (though, each year, some April 1 gag does usually turn into a product...)

  9. noroimusha
    FAIL

    The title is required, and must contain letters and/or digits.

    http://www.hotukdeals.com/deals/r3al-d-true-sight-x23d-3d-glasses-5-99-ebuyer/911033

  10. Shane Orahilly
    WTF?

    Who needs Wii when you have the Big G

    Send emails by mimicking licking a stamp? Count me in.

    http://mail.google.com/mail/help/motion.html

  11. Random Handle

    No mention of Motion Gmail

    http://mail.google.com/mail/help/motion.html

  12. Adrian Jones

    My favourite

    Was Marmite and Vaseline teaming up to make Marmite flavoured lip cream.

    I know a few people who are quite upset it was an April Fools.

  13. HonkingAntelope

    According to The Current Bun ...

    ... Gorilla's at Howletts have been given some iPad 2's ....

  14. rkolosky

    Google

    I'm really looking forward to Gmail's new webcam-assisted interface, GMail Motion.

    http://mail.google.com/mail/help/motion.html

  15. Robert E A Harvey

    Shamelessly knicked.

    Chap on usenet posted this:

    https://groups.google.com/group/uk.rec.sheds/msg/0b2081dede6f645a?hl=en

    ( suggestion that Apple had installed a speak-your-weight machine app on every ipod and iphone overnight, and to try it out put yours on the floor and stand on it)

    1. irish donkey
      Happy

      ROTFLMAO

      thank you

  16. Ally J
    Unhappy

    Masturbation cures restless leg syndrome?

    Sadly, it doesn't.

    1. Circadian
      Alert

      @Ally J

      Do you have statistically significant proof of that (though I am not sure how you would conduct a valid double-blind test for this...)

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Happy

        Exactly

        I mean, how on earth would you go about recruiting a load of w**kers?

        1. Derek Clarke

          Exactly how.

          You simply advertise for a wunch.

          Be prepared to pay a LOT of money though, let alone the bonuses...

      2. Ally J
        Paris Hilton

        @circadian

        I should have known better than to post such a broad statement on a site like this. Let me re-phrase it.

        "My experience is that onanism has no effect on restless leg syndrome. Other treatment methods are available."

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Go

      Keep trying...

      Keep trying. Doctors recommend doing it at least 3 to 5 times a day, twice more on Fridays and Saturdays.

    3. Mephistro
      Happy

      Masturbation cures restless leg syndrome?

      It does!

      ;-)

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Not sure about curing it

        but as a prophylactic it seems to work....

    4. phorgan1

      Masturbation cures restless leg syndrome?

      It depends on which leg is the restless one!

  17. Joseph Bryant
    Thumb Up

    Google & Toshiba

    Google's is top notch as ever, with motion-controlled email - http://mail.google.com/mail/help/motion.html

    Toshiba's 3D monocle has an excellent video - http://us.toshiba.com/spectacle

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    ad block sunglasses

    The ad-blocking sunglasses idea has been done before. Let me guess, the billboards translate to things like "Obey"

    ...mine's the one with the bubblegum in the pocket. Uh oh, looks like I'm all out!

  19. Damion
    Badgers

    Google...

    No mention of Google's attempt?

    http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fmail.google.com%2Fmail%2Fhelp%2Fmotion.html&h=0c799

  20. david 63

    Not sure about...

    ...the New Scientist one. I'd have expected more pointers like the fictitious Dr Beendruck* that I seem to remember from years back.

    *Legpull literally translated from Dutch.

    1. Tom 260

      timing

      I think the biggest clue is that it's dated 0:01am, clearly saved for the date.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        FAIL

        Reg is the April Fool

        > That's what New Scientist said this morning. I guess it could be true, but how would we know?

        Well, you'd know by clicking on the link in the new scientist article that leads to the article in the April issue of the journal Sleep Medicine, published by Elsevier. If you really wanted to you could pony up the $31.50 and buy the article. Even without actually reading the article, you would know because Elsevier is a particularly sense-of-humor-challenged publishing house who would never stoop to such a low level as April Fool jokes. You could google the names of the authors and find that they are genuine sleep- and restless-leg researchers. So El Reg is the April Fool for calling out a genuine story as an April fool joke.

  21. Annihilator
    Happy

    Nokia sues Apple

    Enjoyed this one where Apple are no longer allowed to sell the iPhone.

    http://www.gsmarena.com/nokia_wins_patent_lawsuit_against_apple_halts_iphone_4_and_ipad_2_sales_in_the_us-news-2472.php

  22. Jeremy 2
    Heart

    Good old Think Geek...

    ...they never let us down. The video for the Lightsabre lollypops was great.

  23. Old Handle
    Boffin

    Anti-3D Glasses

    Also on Think-Geek, these actually seem like something that might have a market.

    http://www.thinkgeek.com/interests/looflirpa/e8be/

  24. Robert Hill
    Welcome

    Arsenic Sea Monkeys

    I think you missed the best joke at Think Geek:

    http://www.thinkgeek.com/interests/looflirpa/e8b9/

    Doormat, because I for one welcome our new, arsenic-based Sea Monkey overlords....

  25. BingBong

    ThinkGeek

    Have a reputation for thinking up products that you can't get but really want ...

    http://www.thinkgeek.com/stuff/looflirpa/

  26. alphaxion

    title

    The best I've seen has to be Urlesque.com.. by a long way :D

  27. Flynno

    BBC Radio 2

    Surely mention must be made of Rob Brydon's brilliant, whole-show impersonation of Ken Bruce this morning on Radio 2?

    I only realised something wasn't quite right when, during the Popmaster quiz, I began thinking that Uncle Ken might have had a wee tincture or two before the show, such was his cheeky treatment of contestants. It was my wife who eventually rumbled it was Brydon.

    The whole thing was hilarious, and a real mimicry tour de force ...

    Flynno

    o

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Thumb Up

      Likewise

      I started to wonder if KB had been on the shorts before the show, then the penny dropped with the repeated slaggings off of his recent show with Steve Coogan, The Trip...

  28. Darrell E

    April Fools

    Funcom posted this http://www.thesecretworld.com/news/the_secret_world_shifts_to_fantasy_setting

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Post-playground toys are our children's future

    Think Geek video: hilarious. No joke.

  30. Yautja_Cetanu
    Joke

    This one almost had me - about the cuts

    http://manchestermule.com/article/coalition-cuts-will-not-be-implemented-says-council-leader

  31. Dozy
    Joke

    Royal Wedding coupon

    From Groupon

    (http://www.groupon.co.uk/deals/national-deal/royalwedding/280861)

    "Two Tickets to the Royal Wedding for £8, includes Entry to the After-Party and a Glass of House Wine Each at Westminster Abbey (Value £1200)"!!!!!

  32. Timj95
    Thumb Up

    3Squared launch the Iron

    Very funny one, the ultimate ipad2 accessory the Iron, see http://blog.3squared.com/software-development-news/ground-breaking-ipad2-innovation

  33. Avatar_Jack

    Operation Farewell April Fool

    On a day where every hack prankster in the world dusts off the old "funny prank muscle" and embarks on a journey of of hoodwinking, I implore you to choose the road less traveled, my dear impressionable readers.

    http://avatarjack3d.blogspot.com/2011/04/operation-farewell-april-fool.html

  34. Chika
    Happy

    One from the penguin folk!

    Anyone checked out the "Canterbury Project" stuff? See the home pages for openSUSE, Gentoo, grml, Debian and Arch Linux. Then make up your own mind! :)

    1. TeeCee Gold badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: One from the peguin folk!

      That got my vote for best of the year.

      Works on so many levels:

      1) The name's taken from the Canterbury Linux User Group which, famously, does not exist as such: http://clug.net.nz/index.php/ThereIsNoCLUG

      2) Highlights the little factoid that the only way you can even raise the eminently sensible subject of standardisation in Linux without getting flamed to a crisp is as a joke.

      3) Managed to get five distros to run a single standard landing page, flying in the face of 2 and having a laugh at its own expense.

      Oak leaf and cluster to the lads behind this one.

  35. Shane Orahilly
    Stop

    A cheeky double from Mountainview it is, then.

    GMotion for one as we know, but woe betide the man who searches for Helvetica.

    AGGH MY EYES!

  36. Steven Raith
    Thumb Up

    BMW M3 pickup truck?

    Surely the most sophisticated one? BMW actually built an M3 pickup, dressed it up in the regular test mule camouflage thrashed it around the Nurburgring to get genuine spyshots published, then posted the 'official' pictures for today.

    This has nothing do with me liking high powered pickups.

    http://www.evo.co.uk/news/evonews/266305/bmw_m3_pickup_picture_gallery.html

    BMW always end up doing good ones though.

    Steven R

    1. TeeCee Gold badge
      Happy

      Re: BMW M3 pickup truck?

      Ah, you missed the BMW Royal Wedding edition models then? Complete with "Will" badging in the style of the "M" series badges....

      Kudos to Land Rover for the self-levelling tax disc holder.

      Honourable mention to FIAT for their system to provide status messages, sat-nav directions, etc. with an appropriate regional accent dependent on location, the Automated Regional Speech Enhancer.........

  37. This post has been deleted by its author

  38. Uncle Slacky Silver badge
    Linux

    What about Canterbury Linux?

    The unified distro: http://www.debian.org/News/2011/20110401

  39. Goat Jam
    Thumb Up

    Playmobil Apple Store

    I bet they get some people ordering that.

  40. Apocalypse Later

    Summertime

    Yesterday was not April 1st anyway. The calendar went forward two days for the summer at midnight March 31st (eliminating rainy weekends). April 1st and 2nd will be reinstated when the calendar goes back at the end of September.

  41. ChrisF18

    Polyphonic Theremin

    http://www.moogmusic.com/theremin/?section=product&product_id=21416

  42. Martin Howe
    Boffin

    Wikipedia did it right...

    ...they played clever by using true articles but with deliberately misleading front-page links to them. Fanny scratching was about a ghost, for example.

  43. whbjr
    Troll

    Scent-to-Text

    Geeks.com has several one-day specials today:

    http://www.geeks.com/pix/2011/APRFDPROMO.html

    Oh, and in case anyone forgot to mention, Gmail motion... (*runs away, laughing like an April Fool*)

  44. Robert E A Harvey
    Thumb Up

    Another one

    http://marcelgagne.com/content/microsoft-buys-open-source-reactos-123-billion

    "Microsoft Buys Open Source ReactOS For $12.3 Billion"

  45. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Vacancy - Beach Bum

    http://www.cmlor.com/eclipsewi/candidate/vacancy/search_jobdetails.aspx?id=2374

  46. MrTea2011

    Australia's Answer To The London Eye

    The world's first *square* Ferris wheel:

    http://www.hipsideguides.com/wheel

  47. mj52

    April Fool

    Quite a few gags around today. Best one for me? An advert for marmite flavour lip protector in a

    vaseline tin!

  48. Steve Evans

    Fave...

    Hmmm, well there has been quite a good selection, including a good double bluff with the wank-o-meter app, that really exists (almost caught me with that, but I checked the QR before calling it out as a fool).

    Fave... Well I'm quite taken with the Marmite Vaseline lip balm... They really should make that!

    http://www.new-magazine.co.uk/latestnews/view/29350/Marmite-Vaseline-gross-or-lush-/

    Then again, they do make marmite chocolate, so maybe that's real too!

  49. 2FishInATank
    Badgers

    The Razer Talon Gaming Bio-Exoskeleton

    http://www.razerzone.com/talon

  50. strangerRick

    BOGUS NEWS STORY

    From the "Ashland daily Press, Ashland, WI USA

    ‘Chequnnel’ between Ashland, Washburn shaves full 7 minutes off 15-minute commute

    Mayors meet in middle during grand opening

    By IMA LYOR

    Staff Prevaricator

    WASHBURN — Drivers in the Chequamegon Bay area are now able to avoid the dangerous "T" intersection of State Highway 13 and U.S. Highway 2 between Ashland and Washburn with the grand opening of a new tunnel under Chequamegon Bay connecting the two cities.

    The "Chequnnel" — the affectionate moniker for the "Chequamegon Bay Underwater Navigation Tunnel" — is the latest brainstorm from Loo Flirpa, whose past engineering feats have had many comparing him with the designers of the Titanic, the Edsel and double-knit leisure suits.

    "Ya, shoore, we got somadat stimulus fund money, an' we decided to make da tunnel to nowhere under Highway 2 to Madeline Island," he said.

    Unfortunately for the planned northerly terminus of the Chequnnel, when Flirpa was doing the original survey work for the route, he spent part of the money on a case of Old Snakebite brandy, and in a highly inebriated state, made a hard right at the Ashland Breakwater Lighthouse and surfaced near the Washburn coal dock, much to the astonishment of a pair of unwary walleye fishermen.

    Flirpa said it was not his ineptitude that caused the unplanned detour to the Bayfield County seat, but the presence of a heretofore unsuspected lode of iron ore that skewed his Boy Scout compass as he operated a tunnel-digging machine scavenged from the shut-down White Pine Copper mine in Michigan.

    One of the design features Flirpa had originally planned for the tunnel was a series of portholes for fishermen.

    "Ya, instead of adding a sinker, ya just hook a bobber, and hey, boy, youse in business," he babbled.

    The proposal was not adopted in the final design for obvious reasons.

    The completed Chequnnel features four lanes for vehicular traffic, and in keeping with the designation of both Ashland and Washburn as eco-municpalities, there is a pedestrian and bicycle lane, with a rack of LED headlamps posted on each end for hikers or cyclists to use.

    In a grand opening ceremony, Ashland Mayor Bill Whalen and Washburn Mayor Ralph Brzezinski were the first to walk through the Chequnnel, starting on their respective sides of the bay and meeting in the middle. Unfortunately, the pair had forgotten to don the headlamps, which meant they were navigating through darkness when they met.

    “Ouch! You just stepped on my foot!” exclaimed Whalen when the dignitaries met, as they groped through the air to shake hands.

    Both cited their pleasure with the Chequnnel, noting it shaves at least 7 minutes off the onerous 15-minute commute between the two cities.

    With the opening of the Chequnnel, the Wisconsin Department of Transportation has abandoned plans for a roundabout at the junction of Highways 2 and 13, as Highway 13 has now been routed through the Chequnnel. The old Highway 13 will become a county road, and, “The T will revert to a Y — or some other letter of the alphabet,” said a WisDOT spokeswoman.

    Some problems with the Chequnnel remain. According to some observers, Flirpa badly overestimated the amount of compressed air it would take to ventilate the Chequnnel. This problem became apparent when the first test car attempted to use the structure and wound up being fired out of the exit in the general direction of Seattle as if it were a giant pumpkin cannon.

    "Well, every project has its little problems, eh?" said Flirpa as he uncorked yet another bottle of his noxious redeye hooch. "I mean if you got relations in Washington state, you ain't never gonna find no cheaper air fare!"

    Ima Lyor cannot be reached at all...not no way, not no how. Happy April Fool’s Day to our readers.

  51. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    Call the lawyers!

    http://www.reghardware.com/2010/11/26/grilli3d_stereo_3d_for_ipad_iphone/

    So, April Fools at Vulture Central comes in November? MCV's joke covers a very real product that was covered by El Reg last November!

  52. Pat M
    Go

    I Really Loved this one

    http://bluelightfestival.wordpress.com/

  53. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Guild Wars 2

    Gents you missed the Guild Wars2 amazing new class "The Commando" they spent ALOT of time on this spoof

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