back to article Asian soup peril menaces bionic shark

Worrying news for evil billionaires today, as pioneering research by top boffins – in which a large hammerhead shark was augmented with high technology – reveals that large, endangered elasmobranches suitable for the in-lair pool disposal of troublesome government operatives may soon be even harder to get hold of. The new …

COMMENTS

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  1. jake Silver badge

    Recently succeded?

    Seems to me we've been tracking Selachimorpha (and indeed, various ocean-going mammals, which some of them enjoy dining on) for several tens of decades ...

    "In this episode, my son Phillipe and I will pilot the mini-sub as we track the Great White thru' the caverns of my nose" ...

  2. breakfast Silver badge
    Coat

    So...

    So what you're saying is: Man eating shark endangered by man eating shark?

  3. Peter Clarke 1
    Pirate

    Execution Pool

    A good alternative for Dr Evil is the Humbolt Squid- very aggressive, will eat anything AND increasing in numbers. Could be a bit difficult to find a mounting point for the lay-zor.

  4. Mike 140

    Ceci n'est pas une title

    Isn't becoming snared in the tackle of fisherman bad news for said fisherman rather than the shark?

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    Too many mouths..

    ...with too much disposable income. In a world with not enough sustainable agricultural technology or "communism" to maintain a healthy population, balancing it's own needs with the needs of other species (aka biodiversity).

    Sharks fin soup is not the start I suspect (See Cod populations), and Russia's near miss with the wheat crop of 2010 as yet another warning shot across the bows for the (increasingly fat and/or populous) human race.

    There are simply too many of us to keep eating the way we do. We need to change and strictly manage what we eat, and/or how many of us are doing the eating, or improve the technology to give better yields with less environmental impact. If we do it now - while it's only a relatively small problem - we won't have to resort to some Soylent Green style future.

    Depressing picture, but hey - it's Monday.

    Roll on the denialist downvotes, while I pop out to the pub for a nice, juicy New Zealand steak and chips with shark fin soup for starters, rounded off with a 'massive-food-miles' 4-corners-of-the-world fruit salad covered in genetically-modified cream.

    1. Yesnomaybe

      Nobody...

      ...would starve, if we stopped eating shark-fins. Well, perhaps with the exception of shark-fishermen. Nobody relies on shark-fins for their calorific intake, it is for taste. Pretty sure some kind of synthetic alternative could be made.

  6. lglethal Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    Its juvenile i know but...

    ... i couldnt stop laughing at the guys name. Hammerschlag translates to Hammer Blow in German. So Dr Hammerblow studying Hammerheads. Sometimes reality is far funnier then fiction...

    1. Graham Marsden
      Coat

      Stop...

      ... Hammer Time!

  7. Nick Davey
    Thumb Up

    Perhaps...

    The sharks might actually be safer if we did provide the aforementioned "frickin' laser beams". They'd be able to cut themselves out of the nets and give a nasty shock to any fisherman wishing to farm illegally.

    1. FozzyBear
      Pirate

      Whole Heartedly Agree

      Personally I’d also like to see the weaponry that we could strap to the whales in the southern ocean. Certainly give those Japanese whalers pause before they decide to gut and can hundreds of whales each year in the name of “research”

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It's simple, really.

    Either sharks learn to restrain themselves, or they'll go extinct.

    That, or we stop fishing them to death. Syeah, that'll happen.

  9. JaitcH
    Unhappy

    A wasted food resource

    It is very simple to gather sharks fins.

    (1) Catch shark;

    (2) Slash all fins off body and store;

    (3) Toss finless but living shark in to water to die;

    (4) Take boat back to harbour and sell to Chinese food markets.

    This slaughter is such a waste - the whole body is discarded just to secure the fins. This happens tens of millions of times each year.

    Very short-sighted. I bet most non-connoisseur Westerners couldn't tell the difference between 'cellophane' (clear noodles) and real shark fin soup. They now also sell gelatin as imitation sharks fin soup.

    Have a look at: < http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWPoSr76ub4 >.

    1. mafoo

      title

      I think most westerners don't really care about shark fin soup - we haven't grown up with it as a delicacy, so have no inclination to pay £50 for a bowl of it.

      Shark meat (from the body) tastes vile. The closest that people in Britain come to eating it is 'Rock Salmon" which is dogfish.

      1. Rattus Rattus

        Shark meat

        I beg to differ! Shark meat is delicious! I buy it by preference over crap like snapper or cod.

        Also, I think anyone caught in our (Australian) waters harvesting shark fins and heaving the rest of the shark over the side should have their boat sunk by the navy, with the fishermen left on it as it sinks.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Thumb Up

        Achtung Stupid Britisher!

        Shark meat is DELICIOUS......

        If it were not for the FAKT that the flesh of any remaining life form from the ocean has to be considered from the standpoint of the RDIDS or the Recommended Daily Intake of Deadly Shit, such as mercurial compounds, pesticides, fungicides, deadicides; and the mafia industrial waste with the midnight dumping and ship sinking etc, etc., etc., etc., etc.,

        AND the decreasing shark population

        I'd eat deep fried shark in batter by the kilo on a daily basis....

      3. Tempest
        Happy

        I tried rock fish in the UK once ...

        and I loved it! Such a clean taste, and cheap too.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    As a surfer...

    I think more people should eat shark fin soup! :D

    (downvote me all you want, I'm just sayin' what lots of us are thinkin' )

    1. Graham Marsden
      FAIL

      Also speaking as a surfer...

      ... you've got more chance of dying in an accident on the way to or from the beach than you have of being a victim of a shark attack.

      Try doing some research which might improve your "thinkin'"

    2. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

      Re: As a surfer...

      You're an idiot.

  11. Eddy Ito
    Pint

    Pity

    I rather like shark steaks, depending on the model of course, and never could distinguish between shark fin soup and gelatin based versions but then I don't really like it that much to actually pay for it myself. The way I look at it is rendered connective tissue is rendered connective tissue and once isolated can be flavored with anything, it doesn't matter if it's bonito flakes or lamb or chicken and I'd bet most people couldn't tell the difference regardless of where the thickener came from. That said, I imagine it's like buying rabbit, you want to make sure the feet and/or head is still on it to make sure you aren't just getting charged a premium for the stray tabby down the block.

    Now then, the mention of Humbolt squid has given me a wonderful idea for dinner. Thanks Peter Clarke 1, I'll have the bar fender hold an ale for you.

    1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

      Re: Pity

      "I've totally eaten shark and know loads about it and don't think it's a big deal at all and am totally nonchalant on the matter but I certainly wouldn't make a big deal about it on the internet."

      1. jake Silver badge

        @Sarah

        From my perspective, Eddy's comment came off as a perfectly normal comment from someone who has more than half a clue about living & working with the ocean's providence. Try not to look like a wounded seal.

        1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

          Re: @Sarah

          Hey, I love a good 'stunt-eater' post, me.

          1. jake Silver badge

            "'stunt-eater'"

            ::shrugs::

            Carrion.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Thumb Up

        Oh rooly

        Are sharks nicer to eat than wasps?

        1. Eddy Ito

          Shark!

          Can't say, I don't eat protestants. I will say that shark, particularly mako, is occasionally sold as swordfish by less than honorable fishmongers and restaurants. That said, I'm sure Ms. Bee would want me to tell you probably shouldn't eat either shark or swordfish due to the high levels of mercury. Besides, most of them are caught on long lines now and aren't the freshest thing going.

          "stunt eaters"... precious. Oh goody, bangers and mash... again.

  12. HRH Martin

    Just not in the mood for Anonymous Cowards 'Too Many Mouths' evils of man...

    apocalypse is coming, eco-rapture hysterics. People have got to make a living, and no doubt a susbsistence living fishing for hammerheads. The alternative being ... no paying work?

    As a greenie I am ashamed of and tired of all those devilish and pure/natural/organic types and the damage they do to economies, food supply and public attitudes.

    Anyway, what's a few bowls of soup when soft headed 'natural health' ****s are wolfing down shark cartilage under the illusion it protects against cancer?

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    There are times...

    ... where I feel that sinking whalers and other ruthless ocean poachers (slowly, with sufficient time for the crew to abandon the ship, of course) is the only way to stop them.

    The economic damage should keep them off the waters at least for a while, and when they return, repeat.

    There seems no way to either talk reason into those people or enforce fishing limits that many states do not recognize as binding for them anyways.

    There is IMHO no right for any certain delicacy in any culture if obtaining it robs the rest of the planet of something altogether.

    And I for one do regard the diversity of species as a wealth worth protecting. The only force entitled to wipe out a species is a higher one, whatever you may call it- nature herself if you like.

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