Massively leaked iFail 5S POUNDS pundits, EXCITES chavs

hatstand

Did Someone release a new phone?

It was good to be reminded of Roger Irrelevant. 'He's completely hatstand'. Still in use as an adjective in my house.

Vomit?

NOTHING to do with the 'phone; what did the writer's on-target characterization of the frantic blogging about it bring to mind?

Projectile Opinionating.

Congratulations.

I used to work for a company that sold samsung galaxy phones and no iPhones. I had the "newest" (back then) Galaxy II phone and after 6 months of use, the battery would drain after 15 minutes of talk time or the phone would simply mysteriously locked and only way to fix it was to yank the battery and insert it back in.

This was true with all my other colleagues who used those infernal devices...they simply sucked a$$.

After leaving that wireless telco, I bought my first iPhone (a 4s). It has been rock solid, does what it needs to. My 5 year old can use it to play games or cartoons on netflix when we are driving, etc. The battery life is excellent and things just work.

iPhone leaks

I'm rather surprised Apple doesn't have a few next generation iPhones in development, the real one and a few decoys to throw people off the scent. It tends to make the announcements rather anticlimactic when everything is already known.

The only thing that wasn't well known was the A7 being 64 bit, there was a bit of speculation but it didn't reach the certainty level of the fingerprint sensor in the home button and new gold color option.

One of the few articles I have read that left me smiling

I have to agree with every word. I honestly hope Apple fall apart. Greedy and monotomous.

5S + 5C = 5meh

The S in the 5S means Stagnant and the c in the 5C means Complacent.

Yes I do not own or want to own an Apple product but that is my choice. However I used to enjoy seeing what Apple came out with to push the development from other phones.

But now Apple is either playing catch-up or taking baby steps that are not revolutionary. Has all of their employees with ideas left the company? Or is innovation in this market DOA and it's down to tuning what is there ... to squeeze out an extra 20 minutes of battery life or make Siri able to talk like Sponge Bob? Or has Apple become like Microsoft and focusing on profits over innovation by releasing a few "new" things just to keep the profits coming in? (Hopefully not the last one we don't need a Big Step-Brother)

Dunno why your all complaining. Apple was never known for innovation they are known for making things that just work. All the substance is in the design not the innovation. Design something that looks good and people will buy it in droves. They made a nice operating system but its never been known to do lots or have lots of features but its stable and does exactly what they say it does. I think too many people are expecting them to come up with another outstanding product but they won't because they have already made it on the first model. The upside to that was everyone else got the chance to see what something decent should look like and made the effort to improve. If they hadn't we would probably still be using that horrid windows mobile and a stupid stylus.

Where has the funny footnote gone?

I like that bit.

e.g Alistair Dabbs is a freelance technology tart, juggling IT journalism, editorial training and digital publishing. He has a propensity for breaking wristwatches in everyday accidents. He once regailed an eskimo party with an anecdote about buying and subsequently breaking more watches than they’d had hot dinners.

Cmon Say what you Really Mean

LMAO One would think you were actually being nice if they had actually handled one of these. AAPL's miserly spending on R&D really shows now, as the Exec's loot the Hoard by giving each other bonuses ans Stock Options, the company sinks into irrelevance. AAPL is a "Momentum" stock, and this week has shown which way the momentum is going.

Parody or Truth?

In the article you say the video is a parody. Is it really a parody if it's true?

I got an iPhone 6

It's called an HTC One.

Regailed? Mr Dabbs should put the breaks on his slide into illiteracy before he looses his job. I thought old gits could spell?

Why did reading that article remind me of the misspent youth reading "Your Sinclair?"

Possibly because of the "Totally Hatstand" comment, actually.

Anybody who is complaining is an idiot

If you're even vaguely aware of Apple's product history/cycle then you wouldn't be surprised (and thus complain) about the 5S being largely similar to the 5.

I mean, seriously, there was the 4S, and the 3GS before that. How ignorant can a person be that he's bowled over by Apple releasing a 5S that looks like a 5?

Also, the 5 is twice as fast and has twice the memory of the 5, among other obvious things. Why is it that releasing what amounts to a computer that's twice as fast now considered not changing anything?

If Intel released a chip that was twice as fast as the current ones, message boards wouldn't be flooded with posts about Intel always recycling the same crap over and over and never innovating. We'd be beating a path to Newegg to order one. But Apple makes something twice as fast and nobody at all is impressed. (And BTW, the 5S is likely going to be at least 50% faster than current Android phones, considering the 5 is still pretty competitive with the SGS4 on the benchmarks...)

Haha, this article made my day... too bad I have read this at 6pm