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Well, you've really outdone yourselves this time, haven't you? Earlier today, your comments to this sensitively-handled piece on the sad case of the Florida satnav lake incident prompted our Moderatrix, Sarah Bee, to quit her job at Vulture Central. We're obliged to those of you who immediately rang the office to seek assurance …

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Alien

She's Back....

I for one welcomes (back) our whip wielding moderatrix overload in tight spandex and shiny leathers.. and oh yeah, wearing brand new £30 shoes...

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Dead Vulture

I can't believe it.

So many comments. Not a single "I for one," a mere handful of Paris, and most people seem coatless.

Well: I, for one would have been deeply depressed and saddened had Tea and Ears not kept the lovely and intelligent Moderatrix around. I'd rather a lunch with the Killer Bee than a night 'in Paris,' and yes, why thank you, that IS my coat.

(Truethfully though, I'd have been heartbroken if you left for anything otehr than a fantastic new job Sarah. Always a delight to have you minding the madhouse and keeping us lot in check.)

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Paris Hilton

@Unitron

"In the UK you have Sarah Bee.

Over here in the US we get Sarah Palin."

Yehbut, you're yanks, you deserve Sarah Palin.

Us Brits however, well, %deity% save our gracious Moderatrix and if she decides to go commentard hunting in a black helicopter, good luck to her I say.

Paris 2012... You know she deserves your vote.

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Paris Hilton

@Graham Marsden @Poopie McStinklestein

>> PVC thigh-highs cost at least £70

> Sheesh, do some research, you can get them from £55!

Yes. £70 for used.

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Law
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@ I just have to say

"You have torn down the fourth wall - the dirty bamboo screen behind which the naked vicar inside all of us skulks. Oiling himself and humming Jerusalem. And now the vicar is gone. Grabbed up his cardigan and slacks and fled, glistening, into the night."

Most disturbing visual in a long time.... *high fives*

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Many a true word spoken in jest.

I'm sure there was some truth in Sarah's rant. Must be nice to get it off your chest once a year eh?

Nice to see El Reg keeping up the April Fool tradition. It was a pretty bleak day for humour yesterday everywhere else. Must be the recession.

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(Written by Reg staff)

this'n'that

Aw, you guys. Just a couple of things:

- Yes it was all planned. It was an entirely manufactured and manipulated self-parodic kind of hissyfit. (Sorry to disappoint the conspiracy theorist who surmised that the rant was real and the "ha ha, April Fool" was just an excuse. Although of course it's true there are a few rotten apples with views I er, can't get with, who do gross me out on occasion - just not very many, hearteningly.)

- Yes, the anti-semitic comment I rejected was real, over on Lewis's killdozer story. But this is one of the rules of the threads: Any story mentioning Israel and/or Palestine shall beget a thread bearing many dodgy things about Jews. (I'm not completely Jewish, tho, since it's matrilineal - just Jew*ish*. But whether I was or not I'd still nix the nastier comments because it's the thing to do. I nix the nastiest stuff about anyone or any group, as far as possible.)

- 'CVs' should not have an apostrophe - strictly speaking yes there are letters missing, but this does not cause the possible confusion which would necessitate a mark for clarification. In other words, it's obvious it's a plural.

I mean, I think it's allowed now to use one if you really think it's necessary, but it ain't proper, as far as I'm concerned.

- Sub-editing is half my job here - moderating is the other half. With the odd bit of writing whenever I manage to slip enough sedatives into Lester's tea. I don't moderate *all* the comments - the other sub does too, sometimes the writers here and there. I'm just the only one who stamps around shouting at people in the threads. Well, so far no one's told me not to...

- You really don't need to conclude that I'm a misandrist because I deplore some of the attitudes towards women on display here and there. It doesn't compute. If I'm ever roused to go "oi" then it's a specific beef, not a generalised swipe, and it's about the opinions and the individuals, not the gender at large. Misandrists hate men. I don't.

Besides, as should now be obvious, I don't always literally mean everything I say.

- There is still a distinct lack of shoes around here. And ears.

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Seconded

"- You really don't need to conclude that I'm a misandrist because I deplore some of the attitudes towards women on display here and there. It doesn't compute. If I'm ever roused to go "oi" then it's a specific beef, not a generalised swipe, and it's about the opinions and the individuals, not the gender at large. Misandrists hate men. I don't."

Compare:

a) Don't talk such sexist tosh, you morons

b) All men are testosterone-poisoned Neanderthals, and should not be allowed out of the house unescorted due to their ungovernable urges to assault and rape women (or anything that stands still long enough), and I wouldn't let one of them touch me with a bargepole... or any kind of pole...

Only one of those statements represents misandry (hint: not a)

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Boffin

Latin!

Actually, CV never requires an apostrophe, curriculum vitae as the singular and and curricula vitae as the plural.

I don't know, does no one know Latin any more?

</language geek>

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Anonymous Coward

Anyway, about that thing I won

where do I pick it up?

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: Anyway, about that thing I won

Go to the top of the tower and await further instructions.

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Coat

I like the coat jokes

Mine's the one with flogging a dead horse on it.

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Choose shoes.

A derisory £30 for a pair of shoes? This kid has to be worth at least a pair of Jimmy Choo stilettos at £300.

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Peasant's Corner...

Sarah, Jack et al:

- 'CVs' should not have an apostrophe - strictly speaking yes there are letters missing, but this does not cause the possible confusion which would necessitate a mark for clarification. In other words, it's obvious it's a plural.

I mean, I think it's allowed now to use one if you really think it's necessary, but it ain't proper, as far as I'm concerned.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Just to be pedantic for the hell of it, there are no letters considered as missing in the abbreviation CV. Otherwise, you'd have to use its correct plural form - curricula vitae - which would still have to be abbreviated as just CV. Without a letter S anywhere to be seen.

Finally, no comment would be complete without the obligatory attempt to make Sarah feel dribbled on, so should The Moderatrix ever feel the urge to visit Holland, I'll stand her an "I've Quit El Reg Hissy Fit" drink over here. The rest of you El Reg buggers are welcome too, but since you all still have your jobs, you can also pay for your own round.

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