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back to article US nuclear aircraft carrier George Bush crippled by toilet outages

The US Navy's newest and mightiest nuclear aircraft carrier, the USS George H W Bush*, has been plagued by continual failures in its lavatories, according to reports. Sailors have been forced into increasingly desperate measures to relieve themselves. Nov 11, 2011: USS George H.W. Bush (CVN 77) transits the Arabian Gulf in …

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Anonymous Coward

Same toilet designers as used for Virgin Trains?

Cappiest crappers ever

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Coat

Must resist Must resist

What did you expect he is so full of shit not even ..... ok ok I'm going. Mines the one that has cocaine rehab for dummies

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Anonymous Coward

So, letting women on warships has proven to be a bad idea? Didn't the ancients know that already?

Since the sewage system is vacuum operated, the obvious problem is a lack of air pressure to push the sewage through the lines. So, I wonder who the contract to increase the Earth's air pressure will be given to (and, how much it'll cost)?

Porcelain toilets? I thought they were all still stainless steel. After all, porcelain can shatter when an explosion goes off (Err, I'm talking ordnance; get your minds out of the gutter! Then, again, some of those navy bean fueled meals might be hazardous, too!), while stainless steel won't shatter. And, would you really want to be sitting on an object which can shatter and throw sharp shards into your nether regions if Al Queda happens to set off a firecracker beside the ship?

Not me.

P.S. I'll get my coat. It's the one with the waterproof pockets.

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IR
Coat

A turd in the hand

is worth two on the Bush

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Trollface

Made me laugh

Sorry.

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So a Nimitz carrier is cheaper than the new UK ones?!

Our new carriers are supposed to come in at £7b for the the pair (and may rise) - $6.2b = £3.9b, so why the hell didn't we just buy a pair of far more capable (toilet aside) Nimitzes?!

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FAIL

because they would use conventional aircraft and not f35 jumpjets that we get +1000 brown nose points from the americans (were these not mostly planned through tony blairs bush rimming era?) who need as many international suckers sorry partners to prop up the hyper expensive mission creeping program.

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MrT
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Facepalm

"Breakdowns in the Bush's heads three or four times a day"

That would explain many foreign policy decisions during office...

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Alternatively...

...combined with the steam catapaults it'd make a fantastic new weapon against pirates

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I think you just invented...

...Billy Connolly's Jobbie Weecha.

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@trt

No, the whole point of the article is that the toilets don't suck. If they did there wouldn't be a problem.

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If the ship were named after King George IV, then it would be very appropriate the head didn't work.

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WTF?

George number 4 ?

Number 3 was famous for being mad.

Number 4 was famous for being a fat bastard.

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Coat

In the Navy....

You can't take a crap at sea

In the Navy

You can't even take a pee

In the Navy....

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Anonymous Coward

Ship's log...

...has just been given a completely new meaning.

I would not be surprised to read that the sanitation system is SCADA-controlled, with remote access (via satellite of course) provided for support.

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Anonymous Coward

I guess you missed...

... the obvious pun about the Bush having a lot of seamen in it.

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Pint

Why the need for a vacuum?

As I recall the Invincible didn't have sucking heads on it (apart from beer time), but it did have twin gravity-fed sewage treatment plants down in the "bowels" of the ship. The CEO's party piece was drinking the waste water at the end of the purification process. Much clearer than the icon to the left.

Mostly things worked just fine, although I do recall one of the plants breaking down on one occasion.

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Coat

Sounds like

They're up shit creek without a paddle.

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Joke

Downhill.

Insert your own joke here.

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FAIL

Sorry I have to correct you

George Bush Senior was the 40th President of the United States, not the 41st. Grover Cleveland was counted twice as it wasn't two successive presidencies that he held, ie 1885-1889 and 1893-1897. This was covered on QI.

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Anonymous Coward

And as you were paying attention to QI... He *was* the 41st president, but he was only the 40th person to hold the position.

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If you look at the picture accompanying the article

You can clearly see a temporary toilet block in the middle of the flight deck

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Anonymous Coward

Bush...

So nothing new then, a Bush p*ssing all over the military! LOL

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Loos

As if life aboard wasn't uncomfortable enough already.

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Single points of failure

This being an IT based site and most of us working in IT we can of course bang on about single points of failure but you should remember this is on a ship where space is limited and the kit to support the function isn't exactly small I bet.

Remember it is a ship of war and is already the size oif a small island, any bigger and it would give the enemy even easier target practice.

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Anonymous Coward

Long Queues?!

Break out the bailing buckets!

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rav
Thumb Up

"Nothing goes in the head unless you swallow it first."

Perhaps this needs to be included in the Blue Jackets manual.

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With a hint of schadenfreude (trying to spell that on the fly without checking - let me know how I do) I am pleased to see this is not the usual "Bungling, Cash-Strapped Brits" story regarding a dodgy bit of kit.

A gigantic bit of kit.

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Happy

It could be much, much worse

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/German_submarine_U-1206

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Anonymous Coward

> there are breakdowns in the Bush's heads three or four times a day

We still talking about the carrier here?

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Coffee/keyboard

Best. Photo Caption. EVER.

Works especially well as the boat is doing a turn. GWF!

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Windows

Think we've a numpty on board.

Anyone else noticed?

(Pseudocode)

IF name contains 'george' or 'bush' but not 'Angry Bird George' ;

Auto-downvote.

IANAP (I Am Not A Prick^WProgrammer)

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Silver badge

"George H W Bush*, has been plagued by continual failures" -- sounds familiar

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Joke

Bush is here!! maybe even both of them!!

Well, George ol boy, there are at least 2 people that like you judging from the downvote patern

that is unless, you your self have graced us with your presence, an maybe Daddy Bush too?!

Now it all makes sense!!

Better watch out folks!

:)

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IR

"They" even downvoted my joke, which was nothing to do with the politician(s) and was just a play on the ship name!

Clearly it's one person with two accounts, who is sad enough that they think most people give a crap about those things.

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Paris Hilton

May I be the first....

All these references to seamen and heads full of shit and not a single Paris icon

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Joke

You're taking the piss?

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