Feeds

back to article Steve Jobs screws my wife (out of $944)

I couldn't tell who was more excited about our new electronic toy: me or my wife. She snuck out of bed at 3 am local time on March 11 to order me an iPad 2, and considering how much my wife likes sleep, that probably means she still likes me, even after sixteen years of dating and marriage. At least enough to shell out $729 for …

COMMENTS

This topic is closed for new posts.

Page:

Silver badge

Loooong story, cut short

You got an unexpected iPad2 as a present. You aren't really sure what you're going to do with it. It has some value as a talking piece and you don't like the colour.

That probably puts you (apart from the colour intolerance) in the 95% iPad2 owner group. The rest being the small, but disproportionately vocal band of advocates.

2
1
Jobs Horns

Re: And I don't quite know how much I can do with.

/nod

I recently had the opportunity of using an ipad for a few weeks. Only used it to read the papers and like stuff which I sincerely believe it excels at. For sites like El Reg which I routinely plaster with comments of dubious value, it sucks.

Youtube videos ... yeah that too but you can't save 'em on an iPad (at least I didn't think the browser had such add-ons, maybe they do now). Here where banwidth is metered, that's a big disadvantage.

Yeah, it's nice... It's really flashy.. but wouldn't buy one for 2 reasons :

1) don't need one

2) Apple/Jobs... yadadada etc...

0
1

This post has been deleted by its author

Anonymous Coward

@bullseyed

"It has a bigger screen, but that doesn't change anything. You still read one sentence at a time."

But the bigger screen does change things - it's less work on both the eyes and the fingers to read on a bigger screen (up to a certain point), and therefore less annoying. Reading on my phone is annoying and tiring as I continually have to scroll down. The eink screen of my ebook reader is better - it's larger and eink is gentle on the eyes. But I prefer thew ipad as the bigger screen is nicer to read off.

1
0

Blind cow

Bullseyed, you are one blind cow, you've stated the reason there yourself.

Maybe you read one sentence at a time. Maybe that's all you need. An 80 column x 1 row display.

Personally I like seeing the whole page as well. Nice with the papers, you know? They come with pictures sometimes?

0
0
Thumb Down

Hmm

Decent enough article, but I hope your wife doesn't read it. Talk about gratitude!

2
0
JDX
Gold badge

bleh

Interesting as it was to read the life story and neuroses of some random guy, I didn't really find it relevant. Pretty self-indulgent to take the entire first page (and more) for that guff.

3
2
Bronze badge
Stop

What are people so hung up with touch screens

I don't understand why people feel the kindle needs a touch screen, apart from its fashionable. The kindle does one thing well and that is allows reading of ebooks. The buttons on the side are neatly places(for lefties and righties). It doesn't do drawing, fancy graphics, games. Its an ebook reader.

I had a Sony before the kindle and to be honest it was far more effort to swipe the screen to change a page because you had to move your hands from the side of the device and place them on the screen. For a simple binary command which you wanted to repeat again and again it was far to much effort. Plus there was no real positive feedback. The kindle interface is far, far better.

The only annoyance is that when you give the device to some iPhone fanboy they start poking the screen and leaving greasy prints on your pristine reading device. I have to restrain myself from not take a knife to those digits.

Touchscreens are not the answers to all lifes problems. They have there place, but leave my kindle alone!

6
0
Silver badge

Undecided on touchiness

Have a Kindle and really like it. When I first got it I keep touching the screen to make it do things (no I don't have any other touch device, so that;'s a bit odd). Now I've had it a while, you are completely right -those buttons are way faster for page turns than using a touch screen would be. But, there are still times when a touch screen would be useful.

Whether the increase in cost of putting a touch screen on would be worthwhile for those times it would be advantageous, I am not sure though.

0
0

Touch can be useful

The sony readers have a nice mix of buttons for regular tasks like page turns (although there is a touch option) with touch for menu navigation, selections, etc. The combo works rather well.

0
0
Bronze badge

Re

The failings of touch have been well known for quite some time. That is why real tech companies in the past have given up on the concept. That isn't the target market for Apple; they're searching for the consumer who is stupid enough that they cannot contemplate the difference in time for a button versus a touch.

Just ask any PC gamer which is better, clicking or keybinding. Clickers are hundreds of times slower (and therefore worse) players in PC gaming. Touch is the same thing as clicking.

0
1

Who will be the first

To submit this article to Private I-I-I-I?

0
0
FAIL

So, in summary

The ipad does some stuff but not some other stuff

Your wife is far too nice

you're an ungrateful idiot

next!

1
0
Coffee/keyboard

You owe me a keyboard!

I read through the whole article, nodding with agreement. I too am not sure what the unique must have app for the iPad is. Personally, I want a Blackberry Play Book, that way it can go in my suit pocket. So, totally concured with the confession...

... Until we got to the Trekkie dressing up thing. I mean, thats just weird. If Tim had suggested doing this in the same bedroom where the photoi was taken, I think it was a contender for possibly NSFW.

0
0
Thumb Down

That's six minutes....

That's six minutes of my life I'll never get back.

Wow.

What a pointless article.

5
0
Troll

VulturePad? I like it!

Well, I'll admit that I've wondered if Prickett Morgan indicated a middle name or hyphenated dual surname, so I guess you've cleared that up. Idle hands and all of that. :-)

Okay...back to the real point of the article. I recently came into a first-gen iPad (64GB/WiFi if you must know) and while I've got to say that it is truly slicker than snot on a doorknob...and frankly I'm glad it hasn't got a camera in it...after many hours of messing around with its built in web browser and some of the other applications, I still don't see what the iPad's real purpose is. What does it want to be? Why do I need one and what will I do with it?

On the other hand, I do have an Amazon Kindle (3G+WiFi/latest generation hardware) that is used primarily as a reading device. I don't browse the web with it much, but it does what it does very well and the fact that Amazon is paying for the 3G service only makes it more appealing to me. I haven't had the problem with mistaking the device's e-ink screen for a touchscreen, but others certainly have, so there's something there. The lack of color in the screen really doesn't bother me that much.

With flash memory, of course, there is no need to worry about magnets. It'll take a lot more than that to corrupt anything.

I'm not really trolling per se, just kind of responding to the article. Hopefully you'll get a blue cover for your new iPad soon enough...

0
0
FAIL

flipping yanks

When did the Yanks take over the Reg? Go away with your over the water references that we don't quite get here in good old Blighty. This is a local blog for local people we don't need your kind here. Normally this would have been overlooked but the article was terrible.

Man buys IPad doesn't know what to do with it. Well it's a portable media consuming device(yes you can create too but it's not it's strongest point) So load with Movies, tv shows, games books, pdfs read emails and surf the web. Add a few apps for managing servers and it means you can leave your laptop at home and save a few kilos in your suitcase. Oh and it's instant and and has a nice battery life too.

Nothing that can't be done on other devices but IMO the IPad at the moment does it the best.

2
0
Go

Edward screaming to Tubbs

What's going on? We'll have no trouble here! Yanks are not welcome here.

0
0
WTF?

I dont get it

How exactly did Steve jobs screw your wife out of $944? Should this be title "story time and overview of buying an ipad" ?

2
0
Anonymous Coward

Fun read.

"I don't like the idea of using Google Docs because it is bad enough that Google is reading my office email, does it have to read what I am writing as I am writing it?"

Errr, you're a tech journalist. You publish on line. Eventually, Google reads it all anyway...

1
0
Pint

Google docs

*So my text looks like this.

I gave in and got a keyboard for my iPad. Yes, that makes it more like a netbook, even if it is a netbook where you can type with the screen six feet away. However, you only take the keyboard along when you are going to need it - as I did recently for an online chat session with work colleagues while I was out of the office.

But Google docs has issues with the iPad, because every time it saves, it puts my cursor back to the top of the screen and my text goes on from there.*

I'm using notes now, but will look at some of the apps mentioned here. Thanks guys!

0
0

Upgrades

"And of course, this being Apple, I won't be able to upgrade the camera ever."

The implication being that if it was a Motorola tablet, say, you'd totally be able to pop in a new camera? What?

2
0

Writing stuff

If you don't care about formatting then IAWriter is a decent text entry bit of softrware and you can sync it to Dropbox. You might need to move stuff to your public folder using the Dropbox app mind

All I need to do now is to send my cheapo bluetooth keyboard back and hopefully get a working one and that means the iPad is a decent netbook replacement

0
0
FAIL

"deal eight-inch floppy drives"

I think he should have said DUAL

Also

"blonde behive wig"

1
0

iPad 2 content

Wow, this is a fascinating story about Timothy Prickett Morgan. Was there something about the iPad 2 in there also? It was quite hard to spot.

3
0
Bronze badge

Never mind Steve Jobs

I was more worried about Uncle Dickie.

2
0
Welcome

Deja very much vu

“you open it, the device turns on instantly, you close it, it turns off. This suits my 21st century impatience perfectly. I want all computers to do this”

And my 1999 Psion Netbook satisfied my 20th Century impatience similarly. Colour, check. Touchscreen, check. 10 hour battery life, check.

Yup, welcome to the future.

0
1
Silver badge
Thumb Up

Great article

A fun read. Thanks.

0
1

What exactly is a "home-made Boston cream pie"...

...and does it belong on a .xxx domain?

0
0
tpm
(Written by Reg staff)

Re: What exactly is a "home-made Boston cream pie"...

I'll post a picture when she makes it this weekend. March was such a fuckall month that I postponed the cake until April.

0
0
Thumb Up

HP 12C?

Being an engineer, you should have a 15C at least. And, please, I want that El Reg mug!

0
0

I miss my StarTAC

It didn't try to be anything but a good cellphone.

0
0
tpm
(Written by Reg staff)

Re: I miss my StarTAC

I agree.

0
0
Jobs Halo

iWork - theregfore iAm

Funny (if a tad useless) article.

On the iWork issue:

I use iWork a lot, mostly Pages and Keynote, but Numbers as well and must say that I've not hit any particular problems.

True, if you want to export a Word file (.doc) then you have to.. export. And the program is laid out differently to Word and uses a completely different UI approach. Very Apple like in that controls are close at hand (NEVER in menus three deep and dialogue boxes) and drag and drop really works properly (haven't used the latest Word enough, but the older versions haven't exactly been lovely to work with)

The ONLY key thing you need to know is that a floating palette called the "Inspector" is the key in all three programs. It's accessed from the tool bar and is marked with a little blue "i" icon (like an information icon of some sorts. BAD Apple!). The inspector holds most all controls in a tab system.

The only thing that bugs me is that reference programs don't work with Pages because Apple haven't provided't an API for that. Only Endnote has been made compatible. This is annoying.

Pages is a Word replacement.

Numbers is great for those that need tables, linked tables, and good looks but is not a full Excel replacement.

Keynote takes Powerpoint by the balls, rips 'em off and force feeds them to Steve Ballmer. Just WAYYYYY better.

The floating palette concept of the "Inspector" can be criticised, but at least it's not a ribbon which takes the top 1/3 of the screen on a laptop which already has the working area way too low for ergonomic purposes (due to the screen and keyboard being stuck together)... The ribbon is one of the silliest UI idea of the last few years and Microsoft should know better (no matter whether the interaction of the ribbon is good or bad, just the ergonomic downside is a killer)

1
1
Thumb Up

Rocking Chair

This story is like a rocking chair....

It gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere.

Kiddin....but the title was a bit misleading! :D

0
0
Flame

Got an iPad and it's the best damn coffee coaster ever!

I bought an iPhone 3G a long while back. A few weeks later, the 3Gs came out so, I gave the 3G to the wife and got a 3Gs for me. I had it for a while, loved it. Got an iPhone 4, gave my son the 3Gs and all was good. Then the wife felt left out and wanted a 4. So we got her a 4 and my daughter got the 3. Then the wife got an iPad at work since she works at help desk and handles most of the phones and stuff like that. Then my boss, who for tax reasons or something couldn't give cash, gave us all iPads for Christmas.

I couldn't figure out what to do with the iPad.

1) It doesn't sync my iPhone, I have to use my Mac Book for that (which runs Windows ONLY)

2) It doesn't fit in my pocket

3) It doesn't run anything my iPhone doesn't

4) It takes FOREVER to charge

5) I can't install software on it without buying it again since I've used all 5 of my activations for 4 iPhones and the wife's iPad. So I'd need another account.

6) It sometimes loses track of the files on it (movies for the kids in the car)

7) I either have to sit up straight to type with two hands or type with one hand and move that hand back and forth like mad since the keyboard is too damn big for one hand typing and too damn small for two hand typing.

8) I can write programs on it unless I use remote desktop to a PC or a Mac and then try desperately to use a tablet with either of those via remote (SLOW!!!)

9) If I want to save an MP3 file from the net to the device, I have to plug it into a computer. Can't do it directly.

10) I can't type on it for shit since I can't feel the keys. You shouldn't have to see the screen to type. Even if you do need to see the screen, your neck will break eventually since you have to look down at the screen with the keyboard on it to see what you're typing.

11) It can't play the Mac or PC games, only iPad/iPhone games. Kinda lame.

12) If you don't use headphones and a remote, you can't listen to music and play a game most of the time since starting many games stops the music, so you exit out and start the music again, the go back into the app which stops the music. You need the remote on the headphones to start the music once the game is running.

13) Most web sites with iPhone content insist on sending shitty half asses iPhone web pages to the iPad which makes the letters HUGE and everything is formatted as it's laid out for a 90 year old lady who hasn't bought new glasses since Hoover was in office.

I can go on for a while. But, what I use the iPad for is to avoid running down my iPhone batteries when I read books from the Kindle app to my kids before bedtime and I use it to keep my coffee cup from leaving rings on the coffee table.

Oh... then 3 months later, Apple releases a new version which effectively jacks the specs on the new one SO much that app developers will now write great apps and games for the new ones and either not bother with the iPad 1 OR they'll suck balls because they won't be optimized for the iPad 1. So, before I really even get used to using it, Apple has nearly obsoleted it.

Next time, I hope the boss just gives cash instead.

5
0

Word processor?

Just get whatever text editor suits you and write in LaTeX, processing it off of the iPad.

The learning curve can be steep for anything fancy, but for all-text documents it's dead simple, and you use your brain cells on _content_ rather than formatting and layout.

0
0
G4Z
Thumb Up

6 minutes I will never get back damn you!!!

is a sentiment I really don't understand, if I had something more valuable to spend 6 minutes on instead of reading el reg then I would be doing that, but I don't because I am at work so I really don't want those 6 minutes back. In fact what I wanted to do was precisely that, waste 6 minutes and then some by reading it and the comments.

So thanks for that tpm!

2
2
Bronze badge

Slightly off topic..

but one quote.. [I don't like the idea of using Google Docs because it is bad enough that Google is reading my office email, does it have to read what I am writing as I am writing it?]

Odd, I wrote an e-mail awhile ago, and in the mail I wrote "attached is my CV...".

Gmail stopped the send, because "You've written 'I have attached', but there is no attachment."..It was right..

Now, send a letter to your 16-year-old girlfriend about a meeting and will Gmail pop up with "It seems you're meeting a lady tonight. See ads on the right for all-night chemists"

-Erm?

0
0

A euphemism?

A "home mad Boston cream pie" ? Sounds good to me, but only once a year?

0
0
Happy

My wife gave me an Ipad2 as well

and, while I plan to use it as a portable browser and document reader, it was obviously designed with one sole overriding purpose in mind: for playing Plants vs. Zombies....

0
0
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Ummm it's called Nook Color...

...and it's available for under $300 and is getting Android 2.3 aka Gingerbread before the Summer:

"Right now, the iPad 2 is going to be my Kindle and my portable Web browser. I know people love their Kindles, but I like color and I also like touchscreens. Sorry, but there is no going back once you have been there."

You need a Nook Color, not an iPad, it's pretty obvious form this article. Or give a shot to the upcoming Blackberry PlayBook - I rarely get to anything positive about RIM, it's a giant cluster*&^% but PlayBook, running QNX-sourced OS, looks really awesome + it runs all Java-based Android apps (most of them are.)

Let's face it: iPad 2 is simply tired, boring and just another skin on the same old, boring, broken iOS architecture - other than Mac users already using iPhone w/ Mac desktops it does not make any sense for anyone to buy it especially for such a laughable price.

Paris because buying an iPad 2 is really her IQ level...

0
0
Anonymous Coward

Your wife got screwed but she didn't get kissed

Steve jobs got in someone's pants... I'd demand your money back and an apology. Why would anyone buy these foolish toys?

0
0
Happy

home-made Boston cream pie and a decent beer,

Well the decent beer's out of the question (is there such a thing in the US), but the Boston cream pie has piqued my interest. I think we should be told the recipe.

As for the IT angle, I've got some electronic weighing scales.

0
0
tpm
(Written by Reg staff)

Re: home-made Boston cream pie and a decent beer,

There is very decent beer. See, I make it myself. The latest is a buckwheat honey porter. I have ten gallons of hard cider--weighing in at 11.5 per cent alcohol--ready to bottle this weekend.

1
0
Silver badge

But Tim, we're Yanks ...

... everybody knows us Septics can't brew beer.

::contemplates Lagunitas, Dogfish, Hopland/Mendocino, North Coast, Anderson Valley, and Stone ::

Must be another one of those reality distortion field thingies ... kinda like iFads ;-)

0
0
Happy

Not my great grandson's device at all.

I can imagine him sitting on a destroyed bit of kit; looking over a devastated landscape and watching the battery die.

At least offer me solar recharging; I mean come on, thousands of years into this civilization nonsense and the arrowhead still works.

The Ipad has got to eventually pass up the blunt instrument as a civilizing tool.

Well we are not there yet.

I have a rock.

Irock*.

*in some circles.

*and paper.

*and scissors.

0
0
Grenade

O H...

For years I have put up with the deplorable standards of this rag (actually enjoined it, in fact), but this policy of bashing the Buckeyes must desist, or I shall cancel my subscription.

Go back to Michigan if that's how you feel.

(One more thing, "bashing the Buckeyes" is not now, and never has been, a euphemism. Just thought I should clarify with this lot.)

0
0
JB
Coat

made me think...

Reading this made me think of the Sunday Format

0
0

Page:

This topic is closed for new posts.