Sources in Cupertino have exclusively confirmed to the Reg that Apple intends to follow up its anticipated iPad success with a miniature, pocket-sized version boasting added voice technology. "The iPad's a great device," an executive familiar with the matter said yesterday. "But think how great it would be if you could carry it …
WTF, another Apple product without the keyboard !!!
They need to re-think their whole product strategy. In fact the what the world needs is a product centred around the full size clickety clackety keyboard, with a pop out small screen if occasionally you want to see what your typing or what someone else sends to you...if you are not able to keep up with the rapidly glowing keys that type out a message to you in real time, a bit like optical morse code.
Then a mouse could be hung off, a printer, speakers, mic. In fact a very versatile and interactive iKeyboard.
More Apple devices
I think we need fewer multifunction devices and more specialised gadgets. Could I have something to alert me to the presence of young women in short skirts and low-cut tops? But what to call it?
<Leslie Phillips voice>
</Leslie Phillips voice>
You owe me a new keyboard ;-)
Another product for iDle lazy barstewards you have no real work to do but to f around all day with their latest iCrap product.
Big LOL at the article.
Even bigger LOL at the idots who missed the joke.
Should be named and shamed me thinks
Too easy :)
"Sources in Cupertino have exclusively confirmed to the Reg ..."
That was too much of a clue, right up front; or were you trying to be kind to the less bright among us?
One of those articles...
...where the main story is great but some of the comments just make it... Must be Friday... What? It's not? Bugger.
Indeed... does anyone know what the iPad is actually *for*?
Psst. It's for making Apple money, of course. What else would it be for?
You ask your girlfriend... :-)
That's what happens when we let them Yanks onto our world-wide-web.
I thought the clue was in the first line...
"Sources in Cupertino have exclusively confirmed to the Reg..."
Hah, like Apple has ever confirmed anything to the Reg, and exclusively? I think Steve Jobs would sexually harass himself with an Xbox before that happened!
I'm as disturbed as Sarah that so many people fail to understand satire, though. Le sigh.
16gb- Slim Ipad
32gb- Regular ipad
64Gb- Max Ipad!
All of a sudden madtv's parody has gone through the roof!
And loving how takuhii seems to have deleted his own post in shame.
Oh well, time to check my email on the awesome Ipad mini.
FAIL- as well, its a BFO Ipod touch, with an name which sounds like something which should be shoved in ladies underwear.
Sounds like a sanitary product, marketing genius if they go with that!
Yes yes yes but will it have 'wings' ?
a netbook without a keyboard?
Why not just get a netbook for half the money? I know it won't have all the "cool apps" but you'll still get everything you need done in non-cool Windows for a lot less money. There is nothing you can't do on a Windows netbook that this can do (just add Kindle software). While I do admit to being a Apple/iLemming hater, I do understand their other products and why they succeed. But if this sells to the masses I guess I am completely out of touch and will have to start printing Jobs for president stickers.
70" iPads coming soon
As LCD prices continue to drop, they will be soon be cheaper than walls and coffee tables. Likely already are if you shop in the 'right' stores in London.
Want the dining room table to look like old pine for breakfast and polished marble for dinner? DONE.
With iPad/Walls installed, you will never have to paint again. Just pay a little extra and adverts for vlagra and Windows 8 will not follow you around the house. Just imagine how great its going to be!
Anyone who doesn't get this...
...doesn't deserve to get one.
@Interesting - Sarah Bee
By any chance can you tell us where they appear to be from??
One country seems to be pondering the introduction of a dedicated symbol for their special little dears who are .... let's say "challenged"
Please stop removing my comments. Deriding the abilitity of someone, who is clearly a troll, to copy and paste Apple bumf, after the fiasco that was copy and paste for the iPhone, without levelling any person insults of any kind to the OP is hardly a cause to dis-allow the comment, is it not? I see far, far more off-topic and foul language comments every day on El Reg and yet they remain.
Please feel free to punish me, with the liberal application of a good spanking, for my temerity to question the decisions of the moderatix.
It's Sarah, not Sara.
Something to remember too…it’s not always Sarah at the helm. (Which is unfortunate when you spend 15 minutes carefully crafting a comment to troll her, only to have it read by someone else!) The lady does get some days off; your comments may have been moderated by her, by someone else, or by some combination thereof.
Also: she doesn't remember who any of us are, and probably doesn't care. (Make the appropriate exception for amanfromMars.) The chances that she is somehow purposefully moderating your comments is pretty slim. Besides which, she deals with a lot of comments every day. You could just be a victim of someone else’s comments having put her in a bit of a foul mood.
Have a pint and relax!
An additional reply, (or maybe not additional if the previous one gets moderated?):
Don't feel bad, she dinged me too. (A completely innocuous comment on a totally unrelated thread.)
My guess (based on the comment) is simply that she's read it so many times in so many other comments by now that I'm lucky she didn't crawl through the tubes and stab me in the face with a comma.
aren't they just talking about the iphone?
<Thud> The sound of the penny dropping.
I'm terribly sorry but I don't know who you are. I moderate up to 500 comments a day with assistance from others, who may have taken exception to your outpourings. Or it may have been me. I don't recall. We strive for consistency but it's a little like freedom, or justice - unobtainable absolutes that we can only work towards, never truly achieve.
My name has an H on the end. Perhaps you should remove your eyewear when you sit down to write to me.
app store approval process
Is now working on The Reg
I fell for it. I liked the idea of the ipad but it fails in so many ways, largely it is far too BIG. I was hoping for something around 8", 16:9, with voice and multitasking. A device somewhere between the size of an iphone and the ipad (with more power) is what I really want.
@damn: That would be an N900
no one here today
El Reg or The Onion?
The past few days, I've spotted articles on El Reg which are better suited to The Onion. Is this to be the norm? I like humor as much as the next guy (can't wait for the next episode of BOFH), but El Reg needs to maintain some decorum appropriate for a news source.
Not sure if serious.
Welcome to El Reg's bootnotes section.
Onion-like articles are confined here. If you would prefer to read El Reg sans-bootnotes you can browse articles by section, or e-mail the Reg to request a new feature be added to the website. (At the bottom of the page, click on “Company Info,” and the “Contact The Register.” I recommend talking to Phillip Mitchell.)
This new bootnotes-less version of the site might well be possible to add as a “feature”. (Most readers would call it a “bug.”) Perhaps at http://nofun.theregister.co.uk
The chances are the “feature” doesn’t exist simply because it has never been requested.
I just came in...
for the clever wit and comments. We have spanking too? Count me in!
I SOOOOOOO want an iPad Nano!
*spews pint at keyboard and screen*
I'm practically passing out laughing at this article, then it gets better with so many who COMPLETELY miss the joke!
El Reg. Sarah, et al... Well played.
I'll be expecting the Fedex man with my new keyboard promptly for the damage this has wrought.
Keep up the good work!
missing the point?
Stating the obvious - Wouldn't this simply be the derivative of the existing i-phones?
Re: missing the point?
I could so zap everyone here who didn't get it, especially all the ones after the first one who neither understood the joke nor READ ALL THE COMMENTS POINTING OUT THE JOKE. None of you should be allowed to comment on the internet. Hand back your laminated cards right now.
Sarah, Sarah, Sarah
Slope off down the pub and have a stiff drink.
You *know* these people (I use the term loosely) don't read beyond the second (third, if you're lucky) paragraph of the story before clicking the "Comment" link, let alone read all the other comments.
Yet another piece of 'i' crap to avoid !
- World's OLDEST human DNA found in leg bone – but that's not the only boning going on...
- Lightning strikes USB bosses: Next-gen jacks will be REVERSIBLE
- Pics Brit inventors' GRAVITY POWERED LIGHT ships out after just 1 year
- Microsoft teams up with Feds, Europol in ZeroAccess botnet zombie hunt
- Storagebod Oh no, RBS has gone titsup again... but is it JUST BAD LUCK?