Sign in / up

back to article Man cuffed for lamppost sex outrage

The suspicion that sexual assaults against inanimate objects, including bicycles and hoovers, are on the rise is confirmed by the disturbing news that a man was last month cuffed for "allegedly simulating a sex act with a lamppost", as the Wiltshire Times puts it. The incident apparently took place at about 4.45pm on 16 …

COMMENTS

House rules Send corrections
This topic is closed for new posts.

Page:

  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Lester: job for Monday

    The Australian blood-drinking lesbian murderers story.

    0 0
  2. Mark
    IT Angle

    Re: @The anti-feminist crowd

    Women are just as sex mad as men. However, when you tell women that, they deny it. As if the level of sexual attraction men has is wrong.

    Odd.

    But when you explain where women are as obsessed (in different ways from men), they often eventually agree.

    But the knee-jerk reaction shows how you have a bis against men.

    0 0
  3. Fred
    Heart

    lol...

    Brilliant friday banter!

    smashed up my Cf-27 so missed all the fun... grr!

    0 0
  4. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Re: Missing Details

    Yeah - exactly - I've done that. I find the pretend hair-pulling & butt-slapping motions only add to the fun. The lamp-post only gets in the way to be honest...

    Could I be arrested for that? Let's hope not!

    Anon for obvious reasons!

    0 0
  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Remind me...

    never to go to Westbury because if the women there are so ugly that even when you are drunk you prefer to shag a lampost, well, quite honestly I'd rather not risk seeing them.

    0 0
  6. Nick
    Coat

    Any..

    Any hole's a goal???

    Coat 419 please.

    0 0
  7. W
    Coat

    @ @The anti-feminist crowd

    Steady on. You sound like a an Alanis Morissette stream of consciousness.

    There's no hatred of feminism here. No conspiracy theories. No suggestion of left wing/right wing crusades. No self-centered, bitter, hate-filled frustration.

    I'm a published feminist.

    Just pointing out some discrepancies. And I'm glad you acknowledge that there's some "preferential treatment". But I'll fail to believe it's "regardless of what gender or the nature of the offence" when a dude humping inanimate objects on live TV is met with pure voyeurism rather than disgust or mockery. Or when a gal gets put on the sex offenders' register with three years probation for private self pleasure behind the safety of locked doors.

    In various parts of life, the goose/gander discrepancy will cut one way or the other.

    Meanwhile, 'The Sun' - "a family paper " - will still keep-on-a-printin' it's page 3 stunnas, 18, from Coventry.

    Move along, there's nothing to see here.

    Oh, of course. Let me just get it for you. The white one, yes? You'll be glad of it, seeing as things are so frosty at the moment.

    0 0
  8. heystoopid
    Joke

    So

    So what happens when you get a back itch that you can't reach and then rub up against the nearest pole , does that mean you are one of the new class of pole perverts ?

    0 0
  9. Alex Taylor

    What the hell is a Henry Hoover?

    If there was an article describing a Sony XBOX or a Microsoft PlayStation, then I'd be fairy sure to see lots of comments about it.

    The "Henry" range of industrial vacuum cleaners is made a company called Numatic. Calling them Henry Hoovers is the same as calling my car a Mondeo Vauxhall, or this laptop a Thinkpad Compaq.

    0 0
  10. Ishkandar

    @Alex Taylor

    How about a "Made in China" HwangHua Brillo ?? It is obvious that you missed the comment about Brand-names being commonly used as generic nouns. Furthermore, Vauxhall did *NOT* invent the automobile nor did Compaq invent the Portable Computer (much as they would like to claim to do so) !!

    0 0
  11. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    @Alex Taylor

    In Britain Hoover has become so associated with vacuum cleaners as to become a genericised trademark. The word "hoover" (without initial capitalization) is often used as a generic term for "vacuum cleaner". Hoover is also used as a verb, as in "I've just hoovered the carpet".

    0 0

Page:

This topic is closed for new posts.