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back to article So, what IS the worst film ever made?

Our piece last week on Eddie Murphy's cinematic train-wreck A Thousand Words - a possible nominee for the worst film ever - had El Reg commentards queuing up to recount their celluloid nightmare experiences. And chilling reading it made, to be sure. Inspired by your litany of cinematic shame, we've decided to run a poll this …

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    1. Alabama Amerkin
      Reply Icon
      Happy

      Re: This thread delivers!

      Well, you have certainly done your part! Thanks!

      I'll have to try Google for an intro to "Lexa Doig" - not that I have any broken glass available.

      (I'm still smiling.)

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      1. Alabama Amerkin
        Reply Icon
        Happy

        Re: This thread delivers!

        OK, I saw some pics of Lexa Doig - now I'm looking for that dog!

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    2. Alabama Amerkin
      Reply Icon

      Re: This thread delivers!

      I too, very much like The Chronicles of Riddick. It's a guilty (and perhaps dumb) pleasure.

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  2. Delbert
    FAIL

    So bad it transcends cult status

    When you get a faux horror musical that the fans hate the band hates and the general audience detest what more can you say. Well if you can last 20 minutes unaided by alcohol or psychotropic drugs please visit a psychiatrist the movie -

    "Kiss Meets the Phantom of the Park"

    you can add to a lesser degree each time "Steve ( I used to be funny on SNL) Martin" takes an icon and besmirches it with a remake or in case of Bilko a travesty there can be no excuse especially when you crayon in the script.

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    1. Vic
      Reply Icon

      Re: So bad it transcends cult status

      > "Kiss Meets the Phantom of the Park"

      I'm still trying to get a hold of "Kiss Saves Santa". But I'm sure it'll be on at Christmas.

      Vic.

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  3. Martin Budden Silver badge
    Thumb Down

    Anaconda

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  4. Martin Budden Silver badge
    Thumb Down

    Waterworld

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  5. Martin Budden Silver badge
    Thumb Down

    Mad Max III - Beyond The Thunderdome

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  6. jim parker

    Titanic

    titanic = dreadful in every way

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  7. Ben Holmes
    Meh

    Knowing

    Not strictly a bad film, but it angered me on so many levels.

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  8. daimun
    Terminator

    Leprechaun 4: In Space

    Oh yes. I did wonder if it was supposed to be tongue-in-cheek as the budget was so small. It was so bad I almost enjoyed it.

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  9. Ted Treen
    Pirate

    I can't believe...

    ...anyone wouldn't have "Howard the duck" high up in their list...

    Also the Stallone version of "Get Carter" was so execrable I watched (in disbelief) only the first 8 or 10 minutes, and then turned it off.

    However, not all remakes are bad:- the Bruce Willis film "Last Man Standing" was actually a pretty good remake of "For a fistful of dollars"

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    1. Charles 9
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      Re: I can't believe...

      Howard the Duck is like a Troma film--it's MEANT to be ridiculous, and for that it tends to attract a cult following (for example, if I were to find it on DVD for two or three bucks, I'd get it).

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    2. MJI Silver badge
      Reply Icon

      Re: I can't believe...

      Stallone Get Carter

      Never even knew it existed

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  10. A. Coatsworth Silver badge

    Alexander is one of the saddest things I've ever (half) watched. What a pretentious, self important piece of crap it was. I just couldn't make it to the end.

    I would have just mentioned "Transformers", but I'm certain it was already nominated many times... wait, I just mentioned it anyway, didn't I?

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  11. jon 72

    From the forbidden box of Betamax tapes...

    The Atlantis Interceptors

    Rats: night of terror

    More recently

    Barb Wire - the Pamella Anderson remake of Cassablanca

    Green Lantern

    The Green Hornet ... so bad I microwaved the DVD

    Any Star Wars or Battlestar Galatica spinoff/ prequal and as for the churnings of the SyFy channel probably the less said the better. given the amount of dire offerings it produces it would need a poll all of its own.

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  12. LeBeourfCurtaine
    Mushroom

    The Room

    There is no alternative. End of.

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  13. Total Fail
    FAIL

    worst film ever

    babylon a.d. totally pointless borefest

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  14. Wellthatfookedit
    Pirate

    Lobsterman from Mars was about the worst I ever saw, was funny tho!!

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  15. John 62

    Star Trek Generations?

    And I'm a huge TNG fan

    (actually my vote is for that Turkish film Man Who Saved The World, that ripped of Star Wars footage, though I did manage to watch it all, just not in one sitting)

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  16. HP Cynic

    Troll 2

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  17. adybrown
    WTF?

    ....

    I dont know if this has been mentioned but.....

    Mortal Kombat Annihilation

    ... what an aweful, aweful film!

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  19. Peter Johnstone

    Police academy.

    I nominate all of the 'Police academy' films. Each sequel worse than the last.

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  20. Alabama Amerkin
    WTF?

    So, why no mention of Von Trier's "Dogville", starring Nicole Kidman?

    I, personally, loved it. Very many other amazon.com reviewers, however, apparently lacked the subtle and sophisticated artistic sensitivities that I am endowed with. So, I am a little surprised that no one has mentioned it here.

    Well, there is that bit about Nicole Kidman being seen in it, raped and all. Redeeming?

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  21. Alabama Amerkin
    FAIL

    Poor Mr. Haines

    He's on the hook for finding a way to herd this bunch of tomcats. Good luck to him!

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  22. Boris the Cockroach Silver badge

    The avengers

    the remake/bodge job with sean connery as a villian

    I was forced to watch this by a plane breaking down in Idaho and being stuck in a hotel for a day, Believe me when I'd take my chances with that plane rather than have to watch that drivel again.

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  23. Squander Two

    Blair Witch

    "The Blair Witch Project" is worse by an order of magnitude than other merely bad films. Most films have some redeeming feature -- nice idea, bad script; woeful direction, nice lighting... some little thing that someone on the crew did well. "Love Actually", for instance, contains a lot of superb acting. Only "Blair Witch" is unremittingly awful in every single way: script, camerawork, lighting, acting, direction, editing, story, sound, the lot.

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    1. Stuart Castle Silver badge
      Reply Icon

      Re: Blair Witch

      Agreed,

      When a friend of mine saw it, he said the only thing he found scary was that some many people enjoyed it.

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  24. DeVino
    Happy

    I was reading this thread last night...

    ...and had to get myself a beer because it was just like being down my local !

    Can I say that liked to bit in Highlander 2 when SC flogs his earring to the huffy tailors.

    Doesn't save the film of course.

    Have not yet seen it but I suspect that Disney just ruined John Carter.

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  25. Sceptic Tank Silver badge

    Beavis and Butt-Head Do America

    Rumpelstiltskin

    Avatar

    Anything with Adam Sandler in it.

    Absoultely everything with Jim Carrey in it.

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    1. I'm Brian and so's my wife
      Reply Icon

      I must disagree: the series of B&B were irritating, but the film wasn't at all bad. Obviously the two main characters were still irritating but I found the over-zealous security chief very funny throughout.

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  26. shade82000
    FAIL

    The Telephone

    The Telephone. Don't know who made it and don't care who's in it - worst ... film ... ever.

    I saw half of it it in the early 90's and it was so boring it still haunts me today.

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  27. shade82000
    FAIL

    Oh yeah and...

    Wheels of Terror

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  28. EJ
    FAIL

    Spaced Invaders

    It's the only movie I ever attended that I requested a refund on from the theater. The lone funny line/scene from the previews on TV was discovered to be edited for the preview and thus never was actually said as part of the movie dialog.

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  29. Anonymous Coward
    WTF?

    10,000 BC

    It just gets worse and worse until it sinks to the level of mammoths building the pyramids. Oh dear.

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