back to article Bong Ventures will NEVER bow down to terrorism: Our Tough Stance in FULL

Ten days ago we disclosed to investors and partners that a huge cyber-attack on Bong Ventures LLC and its subsidiary companies had taken place. This resulted in a catastrophic loss of confidential information, correspondence, strategy documents, and animated movies catering to niche tastes which we only needed for research …

  1. Andy Non Silver badge
    WTF?

    Eh?

    Erm...

  2. Denarius
    Go

    well done sir !

    ever thought of consulting for Tony Budgie Smuggler ? You would wow him and Brandflakes. Even the USSA should consider your services

  3. Paul Crawford Silver badge

    Drat!

    Well this goes some way to explaining why I could never find those horny MILFs. I must be holding it wrong...

  4. Elmer Phud
    Thumb Up

    Thank you Bong!

    I am so grateful to Bong Ventures for kindly having remotely equipped my computer with the facility to remove offending material on my computer as they see fit.

    I had no idea that so much of the products supplied by Bong (and others) are now considered to be unfit for me to have in my posession.

    That a company is so reviled I just cannot fathom.

    A 'big thumbs' up from me!

    1. ecofeco Silver badge

      Re: Thank you Bong!

      Do you remember Razor Fish?

  5. Zog_but_not_the_first
    Pint

    Amazed

    You can (could) buy North Korean beer.

  6. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
    Windows

    The "Tips and Corrections" link provides for some cognitive dissonance I cannot manage...

  7. Nameless Dread

    Sorry - misread that ..

    " ... When he's not helping _repair_ the next generation of business models, ... "

  8. ecofeco Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    *snerk*

    Well played. Well played.

  9. Cipher

    Apparently Re-Education Camp worked for you, congratulations Comrades!

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    And now that the FBI thinks it was.......

    Domestic Hacker/ex-Employee Terrorists and NOT the 'Norks; do you recant all your promises?

    1. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

      Re: And now that the FBI thinks it was.......

      Duh. Bong! Ventures does not "recant". B!V never recants, revises, or reconsiders; that's Old Thinking and causes inefficient backtracking and non-productive blaming. B!V actively encourages Crowdsourced RightthinkingTM and Strategy UpcyclingTM in order to maximize intangible value across the network.

POST COMMENT House rules

Not a member of The Register? Create a new account here.

  • Enter your comment

  • Add an icon

Anonymous cowards cannot choose their icon