Orbital gecko porn studio was fixed yesterday
Russian boffins have lost control of a satellite containing sex-crazed geckos - like there's any other kind - sent on a mission to hold a zero gravity orgy. By Frank Wouters, licensed under CC 2.0 Not the gecko who went aboard the Foton-M4...This is one Phelsuma madagascariensis from Madagascar. Pic by Frank Wouters, licensed …
Or did the good folks of Ars also decline to buy a stockie of the correct gecko species?
They're going to start a new lizard-based civilisation on a far and distant planet. However, after some time, a group of them (led by The lizard Hon Rubbard) will start a belief system that insists some of them are secretly mammals living in Lizard Skin.
That's what will happen, and watch out when Com Truise, a famous all-action Lizard decides to take on the universe.
Let me be the first to welcome our new space lizard overlords ...
As a keeper of crested geckos, I can attest they make some impressively loud screechy-clicky sounds during their nocturnal escapades. But the one question yet to be answered by all this is... why? Did a research proposal put in as an April Fools joke somehow receive funding? Don't let anyone tell you Russians don't have a sense of humour...
A number of less-than-fortunate consequences may follow from this. Many of them sound like the names of films, like "The Geckos came from Outer Space" or "Invasion of the Geckos". Of course the worst one would be "Invasion of the Lizard People".
Oops, I think we may have had that one already...
Wouldn't that be more like "The Geckos came in Outer Space" and "Penetration of the Geckos"?
(and since this story really is all about sex, where is the Paris Hilton angle?)
Hey, it's bad enough they've been strapped onto a giant bomb and flung into space, now they've got to put up with being watched while they do what comes naturally ?
Exposing lizards to space radiation !!!!
ITS MADNESS, MADNESS I SAY !!!!!
Wasn't the ISS supposed to be the perfect platform for these invaluable experiments? Nothing much else of value goes on there? Why an independently orbiting rocket?
Given that they are geckos and they are in space having sex, you have to wonder how much control the Russians ever really had...