back to article Parent gabfest Mumsnet hit by SSL bug: My heart bleeds, grins hacker

Twee UK parenting website Mumsnet is the second high-profile organisation to claim it has fallen victim to the infamous Heartbleed OpenSSL vulnerability. Hackers boasted they accessed Mumsnet users’ data via the password-leaking bug – which is present in HTTPS servers and other services and software running a OpenSSL 1.0.1 to 1. …

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Anonymous Coward

Cynic says that this is just a way of making sure that mumsnet is in the news. "Oh noes, hackers have struck at us".

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Anonymous Coward

It'll turn out to be the work of a mumsnetter's gifted offspring, which will give their proud mother something else to discuss at length with her online friends: 'I had no idea Jonquil and Tarquin were so savvy, but their teacher always said she'd never met any other children quite like them, I mean their father can't even change a lightbulb, I don't know where...' etc... etc... etc...

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It is a natural necessity

Whoever the hacker is, I am sure that they have or they had a mother. But maybe not a father.

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Not sure if you are aware of Mumsnet's solid left-wing credentials, but founder Justine Roberts is married to Ian Katz, BBC Newsnight editor and ex deputy editor of the Guardian, the paper from which Newsnight takes its senior staff.

While at The Guardian, Katz (says wikipedia) oversaw a campaign to influence the outcome of elections in Clark County, Ohio to help swing the 2004 US Presidential election against Bush and in favour of Kerry. It was not successful and it was not popular with Clark County voters who, surprisingly, don't like foreigners interfering in their election process.

Roberts studied "PPE" (Politics, Philospohy and Economics) at Oxford, a fairly new subject also studied, at Oxford, by Labour MPs Angela Eagle, Maria Eagle, Ed Balls, Yvette Cooper, David Milliband as well as PM David Cameron.

Funny how many of our leaders went to the same school, lived in the same street, studied the same (slightly naff) subject at the same place, are in business together, living together, are related to each other, (often concealing the fact with maiden names). It perhaps explains how come much party policy, large swathes of the BBC, media public institutions are papered over with an unthinking groupthink so uniform you can't see the join. Sorry for the lengthy off topic rantathon.

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Selfies can be good.

The pain of getting, renewing and now revoking certificates is a complete and unwelcome pain. Actually most of our https stuff is between our servers and close clients. They trust us, they would trust our servers except for those big red screens Chrome et al throw up when they see a self signed certificate.

So we dutifully used proper ones. Whereas the old self-signed could be replaced instantly. Hence paradoxically our users were more secure with selfies.

And millions/billions of Wordpress users will have been exposing their usernames/passwords in plain text since Z80 Assembler ruled the world - mostly without incident. Its security with a hole that's really dangerous at attracting the hacking flies.

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Unhappy

Re: Selfies can be good.

"And millions/billions of Wordpress users will have been exposing their usernames/passwords in plain text since Z80 Assembler ruled the world - mostly without incident. Its security with a hole that's really dangerous at attracting the hacking flies."

I imagine that the number of folks with access to the network traffic containing those clear text usernames and passwords is quite limited. In contrast the OpenSSL bug lets world plus dog have a go.

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Boffin

Re: Selfies can be good.

"So we dutifully used proper ones. Whereas the old self-signed could be replaced instantly. Hence paradoxically our users were more secure with selfies."

Also, don't forget that with a 'selfie' there is no third party chain of trust above you that could be hacked/pwned by gchq/nsa/blackhat etc.

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Oh, how terrible.

This is really terrible news.............my heart bleeds.

The only thing funnier would be if they found their way into the extremist list of websense and started getting blocked as such!! Given some of the clangers that have happened in the past in this area, it could just happen.

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Double edged sword...

Great to know that this OpenSSL flaw is being publicized, but it probably hasn't helped that almost all tech and news publications have dissected in very great detail the flaw itself, and how to exploit it.

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Re: Double edged sword...

Not really, anyone that wanted to find out would have just done a search for the info. Do you think anyone really relied on a news outlet for a technical implementation of an attack? Or did they go to a more sensible place.

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Childcatcher

Karma is a female canine

If Mumsnet didn't try to get CallMeDave to legislate the net down to CBeebies-friendly levels instead of ACTUALLY SUPERVISING THEIR CHILDREN'S NET ACCESS, the script-kiddies probably wouldn't have targeted them.

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Re: Karma is a female canine

Hey, give them a break. I don't think you can even guess at the workload of a Mumsnet user. Spending all day on the site then breaking every traffic law known to man, just so they can be first to park their BMW X6 diagonally across the road in front of their children's school, is very stressful.

I think you will also find it is the responsibility of the nanny to monitor the childs access to the internet, that's what they get paid £1.25 an hour for.

Geez, you would think in this day and age that they would be allowed to denigrate the fathers input into childcare without having to suffer criticism or hacking.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Karma is a female canine

Wonko, how dare you suggest such a thing! We have far more important things to do than supervise our own children - are you one of those old-fashioned reactionary types that thinks people should be accountable and responsible for their actions? Everyone knows that society as a whole is to blame for everything, except of course those accused being classes of offender (who should just be strung up, don't worry about the expense of a trial or anything, we have the Daily Fail front page for presenting all the evidence of their guilt, and a quarter of the back of a stamp for the balanced and equal coverage of their defence)

On the plus side, we have the fine example of the founder of Mumsnet actually taking responsibility for her own website and fixing the thing herself. Or perhaps not.

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Re: Karma is a female canine

I see as many as 3 mumsnetters have read this thread.

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Trollface

Information of value

Was there actually any to extract from mumsnet?

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Paris Hilton

Re: Information of value

mums?

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Glad it's not just me, then ...

And here I was thinking 'couldn't have happened to a nicer bunch of people ...' ... glad I'm not alone.

Karma is, as they say, a bitch.

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Mumsnet: "By parents for parents"

Are dads not parents too?

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Re: Mumsnet: "By parents for parents"

I dunno, cos I haven't joined, but I think that there are dads on MumsNet. My wife assures me that there are, anyway. Honestly, though, I'm the worst dad in the world and I'd rather leave all the messy, worrying, stuff with her - and I'll do the playing with lego and reading stories to the kids bit.

Wasn't there some story on there about spaffing in a cup by the bed though? Or did I make that up? Not a very effective way of getting your girl preggers, I'd have thought.

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Re: Mumsnet: "By parents for parents"

"and I'll do the playing with lego and reading stories to the kids bit."

sounds like you are doing all the right things dude, carry on!

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Coat

Re: Mumsnet: "By parents for parents"

"Wasn't there some story on there about spaffing in a cup by the bed though?"

It was someone's story about her husband washing his nob in a glass of water post-boning. Not just once but as a matter of routine. It went viral.

PROBABLY NSFW, I DAREN'T CHECK.

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/a1875847-Do-you-dunk-your-penis

...and the reactions

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2013/10/09/penis-beaker-mumsnet-thread-washing-after-sex_n_4070874.html

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/mother-tongue/10367709/Mumsnet-creaks-under-the-strain-of-penis-beaker.html

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Mumsnet: "By parents for parents"

#PenisBeaker, how did I miss that?

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Devil

Re: Mumsnet: "By parents for parents"

Probably NSFW

OP starts off with:

I considered name changing for this, but, fuck it. We have a dedicated post-sex cleanup area on the bedside table. A box of tissues, a small bin, and a beaker of clean water for temporary cleaning/dunking while the bathroom is occupied by me. Apparently our penis beaker is strange and not the done thing. Does everyone else just lay there in a sticky post coital glow until morning? Really?

And someone answers:

Have never heard of this. And used to be quite the harlot, so really think I would have seen in, if it were a common thing. But maybe my tastes just run to the unwashed...?

My cow-orkers caught me while eye-bulging... I would rather be caught on 4chan, but I LOLLED!

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Mumsnet: "By parents for parents"

I (yes I'm a Dad) have an account, but it's more so I can keep an eye on what my wife posts... (hence Anon)

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Mumsnet: "By parents for parents"

"#PenisBeaker, how did I miss that?"

I have a terrible sense of certainty that typing that phrase into a search engine would visit the combined horrors of Rule 34 and the Muppet Show upon me, so I'll pass.

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Unhappy

Re: Mumsnet: "By parents for parents"

"My cow-orkers caught me while eye-bulging... I would rather be caught on 4chan, but I LOLLED!"

Oh no you wouldn't.

You really wouldn't.

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Re: Mumsnet: "By parents for parents"

"#PenisBeaker, how did I miss that?"

By good fortune/the Grace of God/Inshallah/his Noodley Appendage/$DEITY.

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Re: Mumsnet: "By parents for parents"

What? No tiny wet-n-dry hoover for the wet spot? For shame!

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Anonymous Coward

Wow! All this hatred for MumsNet. Anyone would think that none of you have ever had a shag, and that you're all a little bit jealous…

Oh…

Oh Really…

You are all virgins? Well, I can't say that I'm surprised. I wouldn't let any of you anywhere near my lady garden either.

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Nice try, Mr Cameron, but I'm afraid you forgot to call us autistic too.

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Anonymous Coward

I have got children, in fact many of them. However, I think what pisses us off is the way the majority of the members of mumsnet try to make up for their feelings of inadequacy as parents by telling the rest of us what we can or cannot do. They seem to hope that this will make them appear to be important and be doing something for their children instead of actually doing something for their children.

I, for one, would feel a lot more sympathetic if they could accept that they make up a small part of society and that they are no more special and important than the rest of us.

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Re: .. wouldn't let any of you anywhere near my lady garden..

Your what?

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Re: .. wouldn't let any of you anywhere near my lady garden..

she means semen dumping grounds mate

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Anonymous Coward

@AC

Anyone would think that none of you have ever had a shag

To quote Woody Allen:

"“Don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone you love.”

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Anonymous Coward

Wow! All this hatred for MumsNet...

Really! Where?

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"... their feelings of inadequacy as parents by telling the rest of us what we can or cannot do..."

I'm afraid you do't need Mumsnet for that - the moment you have one child, you automatically get enough knowledge to advise anyone else on theirs. Sometimes it even works if your sister/colleague/neighbour has a child too, it's that powerful.

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Trollface

Clearly an Anonymous Cowardesse. Or else, cheap bait.

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"Wow! All this hatred for MumsNet...

Really! Where?"

Don't you know? If you're not uncritically, unabashedly, and constantly praising them, You obviously must hate them!

Fools only feed on flattery.

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Some of the info on mumsnet is actually useful - children are different and finding out what other parent's solutions, or attempts at solutions are, can be invaluable.

Unfortunately it's hard finding the useful information under the heap of junk posted by the batshit insane.

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I didn't realise that you all went to MumsNet to find a shag.

Explains a lot.

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Anonymous Coward

AC ("I have got children"), totally agree. I'd add that it's a very cliquey, childish place with their bizarre use of acronyms. It annoys me that I didn't vote for Justine Roberts yet she appears as a mouthpiece on various panel programmes apparently advising the government on things in which she has no expertise. Mumsnet also lobbys the government with various campaigns, and annoyingly they have traction because they do it in the name of thinking of the children.

If you want a real eye-opener try doing a google search for (not at work due to the language):

site:www.mumsnet.com cunt

and look at some of the worrying discussions that come back.

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The best one was the story about a WiFI AP that someone named "My Neighbour is a cunt" ...

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Anonymous Coward

That was fascinating, I particularly liked the one where lots of them stated that if their husband called them a cunt that "would be it", in amongst all the threads where so many of the same commentators called other peoples husbands "cunts".

'Normal' people are really really weird.

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Anonymous Coward

I've just returned from the same search. Can't say I'm surprised.

My eyes were opened to what women were really like on their own when I was about 10.

My mum hosted a naughty nicker party and I hid upstairs before-hand. After it was underway I snuck down onto the landing to overhear the conversations they were having.

Bubble well and truly burst I can tell you. When a woman starts with the old 'poor me' stuff just to get their own way they seem to get very huffy when your buttons remain un-pressed. Proper takes the wind out of their sails. I only let my wife get away with it because I know she's doing it, and she knows I know she's doing it, so it's a bit of a joke. She hates that type of woman too, but they were all programmed to do it from an early age, just like lads are programmed to respond to crocodile tears etc.

Women stick together like shit to a blanket.

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@obnoxiousGit

You're making the mistake of bringing reason and thought into the process. Mumsnet is a place to self-obsessed, hypocritical tyrants. That's why they think they have the right to dictate to everyone else and being listened to, even though they know little about the topics on which they speak. They're hypocritical because they think it's acceptable to call men c**ts, but say that to a woman and the world ends!!

It's really the online equivalent of a hen do or womens trip to see men strippers. They all egg each other on and it all gets rather extreme and they all think they're so hard done by. After all, the government simply must control the internet, after all, I'm a mother and have enough to do already!!

God alone knows why some men join. Maybe they're just trolling, I don't know, but the name says it all. Another example of why women can be as sexist as they like, but men would get attacked for doing the same in reverse. If I tried creating a fathersnet, there would be uproar about sexism etc.etc. Same as how you get women only gym sessions, but I've yet to come across any men only sessions.

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No retort?

"The best one was the story about a WiFI AP that someone named "My Neighbour is a cunt"..."

Yes I enjoyed that one. I'm just surprised no-one mentioned the obvious response of renaming their WIFI AP to "That's funny so is mine"...

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FAIL

called other peoples husbands "cunts".

FAIL to everybody who said that.

Men can be many things, but I'm pretty sure "cunt" is not a valid option. At least, not without some eye-watering surgery.

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Trollface

How dare you use the C-word to refer to those mewling quims.

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