Feeds

back to article Apple plans to waggle iNormous 4½-incher in fanbois' faces

Apple is preparing to unveil a new iPhone with a larger screen, it has been claimed. Fruity sources suggested to the Wall Street Journal that the new phone will come in two models. The first will have a screen of 4½ inches (11.4cm) measured diagonally, and a second version will boast a display of up to 5 inches (12.7cm). The …

COMMENTS

This topic is closed for new posts.

Page:

Very Large Phone

Has an acronym of VLP... But don't let facts get in the way of a good punch line! :)

0
0
Anonymous Coward

Re: Very Large Phone

And in any case it should be VLM (Very Large Mobe)

4
0
Silver badge
Pint

Re: Very Large Phone

That proposed size isn't a Large phone let alone a Very Large one. (comparing it to one of Samsung's offerings)

Ok, Beer O'clock looms.

3
0
Anonymous Coward

I have nothing to prove

Unlike some 'small' men who drive 'big' cars, wear 'big' watches yet have small feet and small hands, I don't need a phallus symbol of a large phone to pull out to try to impress the ladies.

Women are wise to the fact that large techno accoutrements are a strong indicator of small penis size.

That is why I have a small phone. The initial discomfort always leads to complete satisfaction.

2
4
Anonymous Coward

Re: I have nothing to prove

A) NOBODY cares about what you like, what you think. NOBODY.

B) My smoking hot gf in her twenties with a fancy for expensive hair and nails, stockings and high heels has a VLP, and calls my 5 inch xperia z1 too small. I'm soon to upgrade her and she wants a Nokia 1520 at 6inches. That is what she will get.

C) Thankfully she deems my member a perfect size of just slightly larger than her upcoming screen.

D) Phabulet.

0
1
Anonymous Coward

Re: I have nothing to prove

"I don't need a phallus symbol of a large phone..." - really? Your post says otherwise. I bet your mum still irons your Three Wolf Moon T-shirt every week for you.

2
1

Phablet

Ha! I scoff at your request.

5
0

Re: Phablet

It's a perfectly cromulent word.

3
0

Phablet

Phablet, Phablet, Phablet, Phablet, etc...

5
0
Anonymous Coward

Re: Phablet

Would the phablet be called phiagra by an chance?

0
0

Re: Phablet

just use phlappy instead...

0
0
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

How about two sizes?

Should Apple only ever sell one iPhones size at the time?

Some people have small hands…

0
0
Bronze badge

Re: How about two sizes?

"Should Apple only ever sell one iPhones size at the time?"

According to the iFanboys who are prone to ridiculing anything not of the sacred fruit..

Yes.

Because apparently the holy aspect ratio of magnificence is one handed down by the Steve himself. And it optimises the user experience in many shiny shiny ways..

And apparently, "Nobody wants a big phone"

"Some people have small hands…"

Then they need to get bigger ones..

Sorry, but this is Apple. Choice is not an option. I mean.. how are you going to know you have the best one, if there are choices.. Think of the market confusion.. think of the FRAGMENTATIION!!!!

What next.. You want colours other than the classic turtleneck black, or the virginal white?

12
2
Silver badge

Re: How about two sizes? (@John Baily)

Don't forget blingtastic "champagne".

Some have argued that the 5C is a backdoor way of bifurcating the product line. It's not unimaginable that the 5C equivalent (6C?) would get a slightly larger screen and the 5S a much larger one.

What would be surprising is if anything happens before June at the earliest, or more likely September. I expect the same people who are taking a strong interest in the next iPhone now plan to start their Christmas celebrations this year in March.

0
0

Re: How about two sizes?

>Some people have small hands…

You know what they say... small hands, small...

0
1
Coat

Re: How about two sizes?

Gloves?

1
0
Anonymous Coward

Re: How about two sizes?

"How about two sizes?

Should Apple only ever sell one iPhones size at the time?

Some people have small hands…"

Stevie boy would be spinning in his grave.

It's his way or the highway.

Now run along out-dated luddites!

0
0
Anonymous Coward

Re: How about two sizes?

">Some people have small hands…

You know what they say... small hands, small..."

You listen to old wives tales then? you an old wife?

0
0
Anonymous Coward

iGasmic!

Well bad news boys... I'm sure with such impressive dimensions - supplemented by the new 3D multimodal iVibrate, they'll hit the iSpot everytime.

Right so when will they start manufacturing phones again?

0
0
Bronze badge

iMax

"Your pictures and videos will look great on our new, bigger, iMax screen. What?"

1
0
Bronze badge

You have seen Movie 43 haven't you?

The iBabe section particularly - everything else laughing at iToys is just second rate by comparison.

1
0
Silver badge
Joke

the average length of a British man's most valuable possession is 14cm to 16cm (5.5 to 6.3 inches) during moments of excitement, with a girth of between 12 and 13cm (4.7 and 5.1 inches).

What are you talking about, my TV remote control is much smaller than that.

11
0
Silver badge

Girth as radius, or circumference?

1
0
Silver badge
Facepalm

Given those measurements, what do you think?

2
0
Silver badge

The remote control for a Roku is 5.5", and that is smaller than most TV remotes. Mine is 8", and I can't really see how you could fit the buttons on anything much smaller than that.

1
0

Stupid

Im a self confessed fanbois, i have been an Apple owner since 1979, but if Apple do this I think they are losing their way (but not of the first time).

Apple's USP, if you like, is not that it follows market demand (thats what Lenovo, Samsung, HTC etc do) but that they create market demand. The iPod and the iPhone show this. Sure there were similar products before hand, but the market exploded when Apple led the market to them. The same could be said of WIMP interface on computers. Before the Lisa and Mac, nobody knew they wanted one.

To start to become consumer led is to lose your lead, and that, for Apple, is a dead end. They will never compete on price and they are not commodity mass market producers. I foresee a repeat of the Scully 90's coming up, with failed attempts to licence products or services to OEMs and little innovation from Apple themselves. Sell your stock now.

8
1
Bronze badge

Re: Stupid

Samsung occasionally manage to lead and create a market (the whole VLP/Phablet/etc market that we're discussing here for example). Granted they normally do it by slinging as many different models and makes at the wall as possible and seeing what sticks, but still.

1
0
jai
Silver badge

Re: Stupid

Take it with a pinch of salt. the WSJ only says it got the info from "people familiar with the situation"

Which probably means the Digitimes article last week. And THAT one cited "sources" in the manufacturing plants, but no one specific.

And it's been proven that a Digitimes articles are nearly always wrong:

http://www.tuaw.com/2013/12/30/2013-rumor-retrospective-all-the-leaks-were/

1
0
Silver badge

Re: Stupid

Who says the 4.5" phone would be bigger? There's room to shrink the bezel on the 5/5S and increase the screen by 10% without increasing the size of the phone at all.

Then they can have one that is genuinely larger for those who want something bigger.

Saying that being "consumer led" is a terrible thing is kind of ridiculous. Apple does lead the market in a lot of ways, but even Steve Jobs couldn't see everything - he was willing to admit he was wrong about the size of the iPad. If he were still around Apple

0
0

VPL or VLP

Surely a VPL is a Visible Pantie Line not a Very Phone Large. Perhaps you meant a VLP?

1
0
Silver badge
Thumb Up

Re: VPL or VLP

I like Ethernet VPLs.

0
0

So can Samsung sue now saying apple has copied their design of large screen phones?

2
0

Sooooo....

If the size of your Apple device screen relates to the size of ones todger would strapping a 27" iMac to my wrist make me a hit with the ladies?

Coz you know, ladies dig near 3 foot long penises right?

2
0
Linux

Re: Sooooo....

It's not the quantity, it's whether Richard Stallman likes it...

0
0
Coat

iPhablet©

It's only a matter of time before Apple put a Trademark in for this.

1
1

How about MOBE

rather than just mobe, so mobe is normal, MOBE is big/VPL/phablet?

You can add exclamation points to indicate larger phones, so a MOBE!!! would be bigger than a MOBE! And phones in between MOBE and mobe could be MOBE? if its just a bit bigger.

2
0
Anonymous Coward

Please let Google release iPhone drivers for their Glass device.

iNormous Glasshole is simply too good not to use.

3
0
Silver badge

Just a thought!

Bloated

And

Laughably

Large

Smartphone(s)

4
1
Silver badge

Re: Just a thought!

I'm thinking iPhone Pro.

0
0
Silver badge
Flame

"Apple is preparing to unveil a new iPhone with a..."

What's new?

3
0

iPhone XL... the XL always makes people feel more significant.

1
0
Silver badge

XL always makes people feel more significant

Except when it's on your t-shirt.

1
0
Anonymous Coward

GTI - gormless tw*t inside.

1
0
Thumb Up

It'll settle the debate

At present, if I want a iOS device with a screen greater than 4 inches then I'm out of luck.

Similarly, if I want a Android device with a screen smaller than 4.3 inches (that isn't decidedly mid-spec) then I'm also out of luck.

If Apple do launch a "small" and "large" size then at least we can finally work out what the market actually prefers - rather than what the market is pushed to buying, whether they like it or not.

1
1

Re: It'll settle the debate

And yet again.

Since you are incapable of settling the debate without ACTUAL EXPERIENCE IN THE MATTER, I will settle it.

I am on my 9th, count it, 9th, flagship phone in 3 years, because I can, and buy what I WANT, and what has the best feature set, SoC, etc, not what anybody else tells me to buy. I'll tell you what the perfect screen size is, because I have had phones with screen sizes ranging from 3.5 inches all the way up to 5.7 inches. The perfect size for my average sized hands? (I'm 5'8") It's around 5.2 inches. Do I have the LG G2? No, I'm not a fan of the phone. I have two xperia z1 phones instead.

For what it's worth, when apple finally gets around to that size in around 2018, you'll call it perfect and forgot this debate was going on for years, in order to justify using that almost unusable paltry pathetic little screen for so long.

1
4

Re: It'll settle the debate

"Similarly, if I want a Android device with a screen smaller than 4.3 inches (that isn't decidedly mid-spec) then I'm also out of luck."

Wait until next month when the Sony Xperia Z1 Compact comes out. The first "mini" premium phone that has no features downgraded - apart from the somewhat unavoidable screen size & resolution and battery capacity.

Incidentally premium Android phones used to have screens smaller than 4.3 inches (The Z1C is almost exactly the same size as the then-premium Xperia S from 2 years ago) but they grew as that was the direction the market went. If the smaller screened phones outsold the bigger ones, the manufacturers would focus on smaller screened phones.

... Before anyone retorts, I'm not Sony obsessed but I have the S and was looking at upgrading to something that's pretty much the same so have had my eye on the Z1C since CES). I own/use consumer electronics from pretty much every major manufacturer including Apple.

0
0
Happy

Dressing to the left

I suppose those larger phones are carried in the front left pocket to increase the Visible Packet Lump...

1
0

Cheapo?

When did polycarbonate become "cheap?" And why wouldn't someone want to avoid having to buy an aftermarket polycarbonate case for a phone because their life/work/play was likely to include dropping or smashing the phone from time to time? (Or just because they were a klutz?)

So let me get this straight: Apple is evil when it only sells expensive bling, but also evil when it sells a mire durable, lower-cost product? Not like you lot are biased or anything....

0
3
Silver badge

Re: Cheapo?

When did polycarbonate become "cheap?"

Er, since always? Injection moulded plastic parts are far cheaper than CNC'd aluminium parts, if you are making enough units. Moulded polycarbonate may be slightly more expensive than moulded ABS, but not by much - and we're only talking about a part that weight a few dozen grams.

Extruded skylight roofng panels and compact discs are also made of polycarbonate.

2
0

Phablet

It's a Phablet OK! Mostly cause it's fab. Chinese gentlemans dimensions a lot lesser than UK btw...

0
2

Page:

This topic is closed for new posts.