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back to article Ancient carving of 'first human-built holy place' = Primitive Vulture Central

An ancient stone carving in modern-day Turkey is sensationally challenging the theory that the origins of Vulture Central lie in France. In 2012, we reported that a Paleolithic artist in the eastern French Pyrenees paid homage to the mighty vultures soaring above the gorges hemming the river Jonte, in the process creating the El …

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Joke

Mr Dimbleby Take Note...

...at least the scorpion has eight legs.

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Worshiping the vulture? What next? Biting hands?

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Pint

Louis Vuitton?

Surely not. Those are clearly primitive beer tankards, laid ceremonially on their sides to indicate that the ritual emptying of their contents is complete.

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Actually ..

" ...capped their work with a trio of Louis Vuitton shoulder bags ..."

Those _locks_ indicate that encryption is in use and you need a key to decode the symbols. Sadly, the Certificate Authority is probably no longer in existence. Dan Brown might be able to help .... maybe.

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LDS
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Re: Actually ..

Well, PKI using stone storage are much more resilient than those using magnetic storage. I guess. the CA is still around there, just the character set and any encoding used for the certificate may be not one of the standard ones used today

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Erich Lester Haines von Daniken

...will be saying he's just visiting from outer space next.

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Holmes

Re: Erich Lester Haines von Daniken

I read that as "just a Viking from outer space" - which seemed appropriate.

We need an icon for "I'll get my spectacles". Until then, a private detective is needed to get to the bottom of this matter.

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Prior art?

That slab appears to have rounded corners...?

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Headmaster

Re: Prior art?

Clearly a seer's warning against IP vultures and scorpions.

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Talk about synchronicity ...

This same morning, not three hours ago, I watched part of a documentary in the History Channel about this same place and these same glyphs. I didn't quit catch the name -Göbekli Tepe- and spent some minutes considering how to get more info on the subject.

Thanks, ElReg. You just saved me several hours of research. :-D

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Handbags, locks? Surely it's a depiction of a 3 car shunt or the new stretched limo!

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Beat me to it...

... though I was going to suggest a nose-to-tail traffic jam of hover cars.

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I snoot my noze and say pah to zee French

The French connection was always flimsy, even more so than some images of Jesus in a pizza.

The resemblance of the carvings is uncanny and possibly proof of time travel.

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There are 60 rooms at the potbelly hill

it's an industrial estate - probably with brewery and decorated pub.

I hate these lazy archaeologists who, when they dig something and they dont immediately recognise its function, reach for the cop out of religion.

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Re: There are 60 rooms at the potbelly hill

they dont immediately recognise its function, reach for the cop out of religion.

Isn't that what everybody did for everything 5000 years ago, though? If you can't eat it, worship it.

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Re: There are 60 rooms at the potbelly hill

And if it can eat you, worship harder.

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Re: There are 60 rooms at the potbelly hill

>reach for the cop out of religion.

I think you'll find that they usually cop out on 'ritual behaviour'. It's our modern minds that translates that as 'religion', even though 'ritual behaviour' equally includes Saturday afternoon at Stamford Bridge and Saturday evening in the Dog & Duck.

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"...a near perfect outline of the Cygnus constellation..."

Is it aligned with were Cygnus is now, or where it was 12,000 years ago?

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Anonymous Coward

trademark?

I think we can confidently say they have not been protecting their claim to the logo :)

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Ted talks

Extract from one of the Ted Talks

"As natural garbage collectors, vultures are vital to our ecosystem -- so why all the bad press? Why are so many in danger of extinction? Raptor biologist Munir Virani says we need to pay more attention to these unique and misunderstood creatures, to change our perception and save the vultures. "

El Reg - Bad Press - never.........

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Re: Ted talks

"As natural garbage collectors, vultures are vital to our ecosystem"

In view of which, "Biting the hand that feeds IT" isn't really an apposite tag line. I suppose "Picking at the rotting carcases left behind by IT" lacks the killer double meaning.

Sorry, El Reg.

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Re: Ted talks

"Picking at the rotting carcases left behind by IT"

it doesn't really have the same ring to it but it's probably quite reflective.

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Re: Ted talks

"Biting the hand that feeds IT" isn't really an apposite tag line. I suppose "Picking at the rotting carcases left behind by IT" MANGLERS"

FTFY!

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Boffin

Optional

Louis who?

Anyway, it's not handbags, it clearly depicts a snarl-up on the M25 as visualised by some herb-smoking bearded wiseman-dude during an unusually clairvoyant bender involving the sting of a scorpion, playing football with carion eating swan-wannabees on antique (well it would be) parquet flooring, and the menacing involvement of a dodgy looking gecko-like creature down at the bottom. And for some reason it's formed the inspiration for a giant stone 3D jigsaw puzzle. Go figure.

Anyone else got better plans for Friday night?

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Anonymous Coward

"...first human-built holy place..."

Odd name for a pub though surely.

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The second vulture head looks to be where we put Lyra The Lyre, or Harp) now. And the disk above the first's wing is about where today's Vulpecula is (the Little Fox).

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Nya

Isn't the one on the left holding up one of those new Lacie spherical hard drives? Not so sure about the crocodile eating the vulture on the right, but the scorpion on the bottom looks rather like the Inq's logo (with a few extra legs) :P

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A vulture, is it?

I've always thought it was a dodo.

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Paris Hilton

Hmm...

The left-hand vulture seems to be associated with a balloon shaped object immediately beneath what appears to be some sort of truss-girder arrangement. This structure is in turn supporting some sort of arrow shaped, winged object at the far right.

Er ...

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Bags?

The middle car has a monkey on the bonnet showing it is clearly a busy day at Longleat and the cars are nose to tail so this driver has no escape when the monkey rips his wiper blades off and proceeds to masturbate on the windscreen.

It happens.

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I thought for a second...

....the Turks had been inspired by the London Olympic logo.

Though I bet this didn't cost half a million quid to CARVE BY HAND!!!!

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10,000 years old

to put it another way, twice as old as stonhenge - at least. Approaching halfway to the age of the chauvet cave paintings. I don't think the article brings that into context.

The carvings are deliberate, precise, clear in what they represent (handbags aside). They feel oddly modern.

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Pint

"we must consider the truly incredible avian symbolism of a vulture playing a swan in Turkey."

I came to try and write a funny comment, but after reading this gem, I realized nothing I can do will ever get near to it.

Hat's off to you, good sir!

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Scorpion

The explanation of the scorpion is here.

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Linux

OMG

It's the first known carven image of Lord Tux bearing the holy CD-ROM.

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Anonymous Coward

Reads like " keep bitcoin safe from scorpions"?

i had 3 bags full of bitcoins, then one fell out and a scorpion was about to grab when ....

El Reg swooped down and played the swan.

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Vulture sports day

Surely the vulture must be the earliest representation of basketball, or could it be an early Disney storyboard from the football match in "Bedknobs & Broomsticks" with the vulture team spinning the ball on outstretched wing? Clearly never quite made it to the film!

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It's a highway sign indicating what's available at the next interchange.

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fch
Trollface

The beautiful cygnet ...

that how fairy tales start, vulture-turns-swan ...

(troll icon for schmoozing up to El Reg ... can't not do it)

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Anonymous Coward

Better Resolution

http://mcopesblog.files.wordpress.com/2013/04/img_0129.jpg

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