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back to article $1,000 BOUNTY offered for FINGERPRINTS of a GLOBAL SPY CHIEF

Privacy campaigner Simon Davies is offering a $1,000 bounty for the capture of the DNA and fingerprints of spy chiefs. The 21st century treasure hunt offers a $1,000 cash windfall for anyone who supplies the Privacy Surgeon site run by Davies with an item – such as a drinking glass – with the DNA and fingerprints of any senior …

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M7S
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I'm really intrigued by the possible proofs on this one. Perhaps successfully activating some kind of massive weapon?

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" Perhaps successfully activating some kind of massive weapon?"

Such as what? A heat seeking moisture missile?

"Massive weapons" are WMD's, under the direct control of the chief executive, PM, whatever title it is for the nation concerned.

It's most certainly *not* in the biometrics of espionage agency chiefs!

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Way to Go!

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Happy

As the spy chiefs are members of government agencies they are clearly honest people who have nothing to hide. I suggest that Simon Davies simply makes contact with them and asks them for their DNA and dabs. Why should they refuse? Into the bargain they will be $1000 better off. What's not to like?

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Agree

After all: nothing to hide - nothing to fear!

Isn't that what they keep telling us?

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The spy chiefs should send in their own DNA/fingerprints and ask for the £1000.

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I should just send in 5 random shot glasses with fingerprints on them and claim £5k.

It's not like they'll be able to verify the prints is it!

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"It's not like they'll be able to verify the prints is it!"

I can't speak for Commonwealth nations, but in the US, if you get a security clearance, your fingerprints must be on file.

If they're on file, they're entered into the national database.

Of course, checking on an NSA director's record should set off a few alarms, rockets, flares, bells, sirens, steam horns... ;)

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Give him an iphone 5S

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Pint

this is so much easier...

than probably stealing the electronic copy...!!!

And if you use those nice handwipes for cleaning your shopping trolley, DNA preservation is built in!!

Beer, because at least you can mix your DNA with yeast...

P.

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Since they've got nothing to compare the submitted fingerprint to...

Anyone want to be my 'credible witness'? I'll go 50/50 on the bounty.

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Somebody should mail in a finger.

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Double standards

NSA - you ask for people's passwords and they hand them only.

CGHQ - can't get native Arab translators because of the racism there which the management are afraid to do anything about. Also they have wheelchairs there but they are broken and it isn't their fault because a contractor handles it.

Trust them?

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Double standards

"CGHQ - can't get native Arab translators because of the racism there which the management are afraid to do anything about."

Do look up Combined Media Processing Center (CMPC).

The US did that intelligence for their allies.

I know that firsthand from the military side and also from the contractor side. I've even been inside of their building.

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DN4

NZSIS

Trying not to invoke the Godwin's law but... NZSIS? No one thought people would misread it like I just did? Just wondering...

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Coat

Re: NZSIS

Really? I read it as NCIS.

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Re: NZSIS

the NZ SIS are a bad joke. The real spooks there are GCSB

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Anonymous Coward

plus an extra 500 for their medical records?

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Joke

In the vein of piracy and privacy

In the vein of piracy and privacy, if the bounty hunters break the law and capture the entire ASS of the targets, would that resullt in just a bounty, or also a "booty", or a bountiful booty if the prize is very valuable?

I know it takes a lot of... gall, or.... nerve to ask, but, what about "nerve bundles"?

(So far we collect: retina, hair, blood, saliva, finger, toe, and similar tissue and prints. There's at LEAST one that, for practicality and embarrassment reasons, is not collected, but could be useful if a torso and very dry blood are all that are found.

I wonder whether morticians, medical examiners, and forensics examiners pondered but never posited it, hehehe (might spell "the end" of their career... for suggesting such a nerve wracking and nerve wrecking collection)

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Anonymous Coward

DNA & Fingerprints eh?

Send in a Bra clasp and condom with complementary knot.

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I've been thinking about this all afternoon. Not acquiring the requested items, just the request in general. I'm surprised there aren't any laws about collecting people's finger prints and DNA. Not saying there should be a law, just surprised there isn't. We've got laws for everything else.

The opportunities are endless and will only increase as biometric security and DNA profiling technologies continue to come down in price. You could have your own creepy little collection of people and even sell that information to other people. Maybe one day you could clone people, just to fuck with them. You could also publish their genetic analysis or use it to dislodge political opponents. You could make latex 'false fingers' and then murder hobos & hitchhikers and pin the deed on someone else. You could use the finger prints and DNA in black magic rituals and mail little voodoo dolls with their DNA and fingerprints to their enemies and publicize it, just to be creepy and menacing.

Just so many options. It's weird it isn't illegal.

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"Maybe one day you could clone people, just to fuck with them."

Clones would have different fingerprints. As many studies of identical twins have proved.

"You could make latex 'false fingers' and then murder hobos & hitchhikers and pin the deed on someone else."

Doesn't work well, leaves telltale signatures.

"You could use the finger prints and DNA in black magic rituals and mail little voodoo dolls with their DNA and fingerprints to their enemies and publicize it, just to be creepy and menacing."

That might work, just have to figure out how to collect *that much* DNA. Usual DNA swabs are quite small in the amount of DNA collected.

As to laws, impersonation of a public official, harassment, conspiracy, fraud, libel all come to mind for starters. The various nations then have other charges as well. Interestingly enough, harassing a public official tends to be a felony in every nation I'm aware of.

But, collecting the fingerprints and DNA tends to not be illegal in many jurisdictions. A discarded drink cup, a used tissue all tend to be fair game, as one is collecting discarded trash.

Next up: Prohibiting trash picking. It would take care of such collection methods and in the US, criminalize one more way that the homeless feed themselves.

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Happy

I realize none of the things I listed are very plausible, or even possible, but that hasn't stopped legislators from passing zillions of other laws prohibiting implausible or impossible things.

All the gulf coast states have laws prohibiting you from placing a spell, curse, crux or using other magical or religious artifacts or methods to influence the behavior or circumstances of another individual, and none of that shit is plausible or possible... Texas accidentally outlawed praying once. Then there were all those idiots who sued the guy on eBay for buying then reselling their souls and California made the practice illegal...

People believe in that crap, a lot of otherwise intelligent people, and legislators have passed laws to prevent that fear, even though there's no basis for it. I was just surprised they hadn't prohibited the sorts of things in this article.

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Try an FOI request first!

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So, having obtained the dna, brew yourself a large batch and spray it around at every crime you commit.

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not enough

Given the claims by Snowden about the NSA tracking browsing habits on adult web sites, as well as the recent news that it is possible to trigger web cams without the light coming on, perhaps I will suggest a more interesting bounty....

...$2000 bucks for a verified picture of one of the five eyes security chiefs with their pants down while browsing a left-handed web site... or for any government minister, senator or MP from one of the five-eyes countries who has been outspoken in support of such surveillance.

That really might make them reconsider the gross violations of privacy they've been enacting on everyone else.

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