back to article Meet the 'KARDASHIAN Phone' – what Apple bods nicknamed the iPhone 5s

Apple staff referred to the flashy new gold iPhone 5s as the "Kardashian Phone" during its development, a Cupertino source has claimed. The "news" was first revealed by New York Times reporter Nick Bilton, who tweeted: A source at Apple told me while they were making the gold iPhone it was referred to internally as "The …

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  1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    Why is that broad so often in the press lately? PR effort?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      > Why is that broad so often in the press lately? PR effort?

      Has she ever been out of them?

      BTW, she does indeed have a fat arse.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        BTW, she does indeed have a fat arse.

        I think it's her squats.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Presumably they really called it that because they are expecting it to be used by black men and then disposed of when they get bored of it's limited capabilities?

  2. ardubbleyu

    Didn't know she had such a sizeable ar$e - useful, I suppose if you need somewhere to park your bike...

    1. UncleDave

      I threw-up a little.

      1. Darryl

        'Lard Assassin' seems fitting

  3. Haku
    Trollface

    I'm confused.

    Why would they name the iphone after a race of Star Trek baddies?

    1. Irongut

      Re: I'm confused.

      Haha I have that problem every time I hear this person or her family mentioned. The missus will be watching some vacuous TV that I'm ignoring till I turn round wondering why they are talking about Star Trek.

      Happens every time. lol

    2. MJI Silver badge

      Re: I'm confused.

      The only one I can remember the name of is Gul Dukat.

      How is the girl related to him?

      1. VinceH
        Alien

        Re: I'm confused.

        "The only one I can remember the name of is Gul Dukat.

        How is the girl related to him?"

        Glue a spoon to her forehead and see if there's any family resemblance.

    3. TheOtherHobbes

      Re: I'm confused.

      I think she looks like a Horta in a bikini.

      Although probably not as interesting to talk to.

    4. Fibbles

      Made that mistake before.

      Imagine my confusion and disappointment after settling down in front of the TV to watch S01E01 of Keeping Up With The Kardashians.

      1. horse of a different color
        Coat

        Re: Made that mistake before.

        I can't forgive her people for what they did to Betazed.

  4. Ralph B

    I'm guessing ...

    I'm guessing she sat on the gold iPhone and is using the black one to try and locate it.

    1. Captain DaFt

      Re: I'm guessing ...

      Actually, that *is* her gold iPhone... in its black protective sleeve.

      Wouldn't do to have the bling dinged, would it?

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Burberry and now Kardashian?

    It's irrelevant if the iPhone is good or not these days, it's so chavvy I wouldn't want to be seen with one.

    It's like driving a Lexus.

    1. thenim

      hey, I like my Lexus hybrid. Since when has it been a chav mobile? Clearly I'm not keeping up with the Kardashians....

    2. Sorry that handle is already taken. Silver badge

      Chavs can afford Lexuses now?

      1. 7-zark-7

        I think you'll find its 'Lexi'.

        Thanks Alan Partridge.

        Ref:

        http://youtu.be/4WpAsmD8rUE

        1. MJI Silver badge

          Lexi?

          Or a Toyota.

          Or I use the Japanese model names where they still call them Toyotas.

          Lexus is embarrasing, nothing wrong with Toyota GT86 or Toyota Supra. Same thing with Nissan and their silly poncy brand, it has nothing on the letters GT-R.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    A feeble excuse of an article that simply wanted to post a picture of a really fat arse

    1. BorkedAgain

      ...like an excuse were needed...

  7. patrick_bateman

    is this really worthy of el'Reg?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: is this really worthy of el'Reg?

      The question should be "is El Reg really worthy of this?"

  8. Arctic fox
    Trollface

    Re: The gold iPhone. What might we call it?

    The iChav perhaps?

  9. Eradicate all BB entrants

    I don't care about .....

    ..... the story but it has made me think about something. These celebrities that constantly post on twitter and instagram have large teams of staff because they are literally incapable of doing simple things for themselves (changing a lightbulb, phoning a plumber etc etc), yet they do seem adept at using technology to post pictures of (b)anal crap. How is it they can master that yet not the simple things in life?

    Actually, realised while typing that I have the answer ...... twitter et al is used for shameless constant self promotion .... something these guys are zen masters at.

    1. andreas koch
      Paris Hilton

      @ ERradicate all BB entrants - Re: I don't care about .....

      I agree.

      I'm pretty confident that Ms. Kardashian's "Social Media Update Team", whose members type her Facebook, Twitter and whateverelsewebsite posts, has more staff than a medium sized hospital.

      edit: The initialism was initially unintentional.

    2. MJI Silver badge

      Re: I don't care about .....

      We saw a mention of a Star Trek race, so of course we come and have a look.

      But that is not a Cardassian so leave the name alone!

      1. Eradicate all BB entrants

        Re: I don't care about .....

        It's been bugging me since I first posted that the pic reminded me of something. Station from Bill & Teds Bogus Journey.

        1. Darryl

          Re: I don't care about .....

          Actually, from the pics I saw a few months ago when she was still knocked up with Kanye's kid, I was more reminded of Jabba the Hutt

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    So it's a phone that doesn't actually do anything, but sit around and look pretty. When you do try to use it, the thing just bitches constantly and takes your money.

  11. ADJB

    To quote Rogers Profanisaurus -

    I bet that arse holds some shit.

  12. Zot

    That phone was not being used for the photo.

    Judging from the angle that the phone was pointing. Not that anybody noticed that of course... .. .

  13. I ain't Spartacus Gold badge
    Happy

    Hmmmm. KARDASHIAN

    Killer Aircraft Released Defensively Against Self-Guided High Impact Attack Nukes

    Is this going to be the Register Special Project Bureau's response to the coming Rise of the Machines?

    Or perhaps an attempt by vulture central to harness its new-found technological lead in autonomous spaceplanery to finally get some answers from Apple's PR department:

    Kinetic Aircraft Released Downwards After Satellite Hibernation Infiltrating Apple Nerve-centre?

    I think her name is a bit long for backronyming really...

  14. Mark Eaton-Park

    I blaim Kenney Everett

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FqOh4z2ASdk

  15. Jerky Jerk face

    The gold edition smartphone, that takes "smart" out of the equation!

    Id have thought the Kardashian phone would have had more battery life, with all that extra junk in the trunk :D

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Should I truly care???

    For I do not follow pop culture, not one bit.

    What the hell is a "Kardashian" (I know it is "Kim" but why this wench is important I really don't care)? You morons pay so much attention to everyone else - sports stars, star musicians, TV and movie personalities and even your neighbors - that generally you can't even keep your OWN lives straight. Most people claim themselves to be "unsatisfied" or "unhappy" but you sure can quote off the top of your heads what some stranger, 12,0000 km away, is doing and why you think that it is right or wrong.

    1. NightFox

      Re: Should I truly care???

      Was that rant directed at anyone specific, or is it just the online equivalent of the tramp who stands outside our local Tesco's hurling abuse at anyone within shouting distance?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Should I truly care???

        So your reply is the equivalent of some chav having a go at said tramp? Pretty fucking sad.

    2. MJI Silver badge

      Re: Should I truly care???

      Here is an explanation

  17. WhoaWhoa

    The very names 'i'Pod, 'i'Phone, 'i'Pad - I, I, I - have shouted supreme, self-centred chav from their very inception, gold or any other colour.

    It truly has become an iconic image of the X Factor, hollow celebrity, over-inflated sense of self importance kind.

  18. Philip Lewis

    I would just like to say I spent 3.27 minutes laughing heartily at the commentary here. This is what we readers of The Reg forums thirst for. The witty, the incisive, the unexpurgated and dare I say it, the side splittingly funny tangential commentary. Who needs our boring IT reality, when we can have this?

    Pip pip ... keep it coming

  19. PaulR79

    Bloody Cardassians...

    What? Oh, I misread..

  20. dshan

    A Lot of Kardashians

    Well, given that the gold iPhone has been such a hugely popular model that Apple have had to expand production by around 75% as fast as possible then either there are a hell of a lot of aspiring Kardashians out there or it actually appeals to a much wider segment of the market than the nickname suggests.

    Apple thought the gold 5s would be popular in Asia; they were wrong, it's wildly popular everywhere.

  21. Zuagroasta

    Arsing

    Well, since I do confess to Mix-A-Lot-like bottom preferences, that photo has pleased me quite a lot. And as a part of the demographic who prefers the Oola/Slave Leia/trashy alien woman (aka Star Wars) phenotype, I approve of El Reg's including such examples of badonkadonk in its image bank, even if the excuse for it is that sorry thing the fruit factory dares to call a phone.

  22. Potemkine Silver badge
    Trollface

    I thought at first the second picture was about a new zeppelin model...

  23. Andrew James

    But thats not an official gold iphone 5s

    It's (as stated in the tweet she posted) an anodised iPhone 5 done by anostyle.com ... and was tweeted a year ago.

  24. Arachnoid

    Cadi who?

    The only Cardi I know about is the one you throw on when the weathers cold

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    She may be a trashy, talentless celebrity. But that arse... oh god yes.

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