Hipsters concerned that their footwear is lagging in the cool stakes will soon be ordering Bluetooth-enabled socks, even if they do make them look like a young offender with an electronic tag. The Sensoria sock monitors impact across the toes and heel of the foot as the wearer runs, providing helpful advice about stride and …
This just in from The Chocolate Factory. Google Glass will soon integrate with a new line of garments, including the Nexus bra (in partnership with Playtex) that adjusts the wearers cleavage based on location tracking.
MicroSoft will also be releasing their belated entry into the market, resurrecting Clippy who will inform the wearer when their garments need to be changed. "I see you've soiled your pants again Dave, do you want help finding the nearest launderette?"
adjusts the wearers cleavage based on location tracking
Version 2 raises or lowers the hod carrier's shorts based on proximity to building site
Microsoft's new productline named Microslut, will among other include a vaginal ring to check if any of the females in your family have unsanctioned sex. Ofcourse bluetooth enabled and connected to the cloud to make sure there is a skydrive involved.
Why would microsoft be using technology from bskyb?
Each one is linked to your twitter account and updates include:
* When you take a dump
* Pausing for a piss
* Length of time spent having sex
* When you last laundered them
Give me 160k and I'll put a prototype together. Hint: the prototype will probably be a T68i stuffed down a set of Y-fronts.
Re: Bluetooth Underpants
With integrated penylplethysmograph with output monitored by your significant other?
Re: Bluetooth Underpants
Excellent. This should integrate well with my new fartr website (or maybe parpr, I'm not sure yet). I'll sort out the API specs and we should make a pitch at Bong! in order to wangle us an investment catapult .
You jest, but Stool-R is under dev during substance enhanced programming sessions for your Bristol scaling needs. Naturally we favour a phone-based point and shoot interface instead of a special tool/item as it will lead to people dropping smartphones on their poo while attempting to perfectly frame the loo.
Google socks ?
Quite useful actually
This is actually quite useful, speaking as a victim of podiatrists :-)
Currently you can either run across a pad or be filmed running on a treadmill: this sort of data could help a lot of people diagnose issues.
I'm somewhat reminded of TBBT
Sheldon Cooper: Perhaps we could expand our market.
Penny: How are
flower barrettes fancy socks gonna appeal to men?
Howard Wolowitz: We add Bluetooth!
Sheldon Cooper: Brilliant! Men love Bluetooth!
Penny: Wait a minute. Wait a minute. You want to make a
hair barrette fancy sock with Bluetooth?
Sheldon Cooper: Penny - Everything is better with Bluetooth.
Re: I'm somewhat reminded of TBBT
> Everything is better with Bluetooth.
Nothing else to say on this really
I'd be interested in some silicon roundabout socks that could cure verrucas and a pair of underpants that could poke my hemorroids back in when they popped out.
Bro, do you even run?
There's some serious heal striking going on in that video!
The Bluetooth gurnometer is already on the drawing board. Runners need that angsty pain-wracked fizzog to convince their fellow competintive alpha joggers that they've just peebee-ed in their pants.
- Product round-up Coming clean: Ten cordless vacuum cleaners
- Product round-up Too 4K-ing expensive? Five full HD laptops for work and play
- 'Regin': The 'New Stuxnet' spook-grade SOFTWARE WEAPON described
- Worstall @ the Weekend BIG FAT Lies: Porky Pies about obesity
- 'Snoopers' Charter IS DEAD', Lib Dems claim as party waves through IP address-matching