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back to article Assange™ names a Senatorial stand-in

Julian Assange™ has again launched his candidacy for a seat in Australia's Senate, but this time also offered an important new piece of information: the name of an alternative candidate for the seat should he be elected but be unable to leave his London bolt-hole to take up the gig. As we've explained in the past, if everything …

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Stop giving this twat press.

He's not useful. At all. In fact, I'd call his story "counter-productive" to those of us who are ethical computer nerds ...

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Facepalm

Re: Stop giving this twat press.

Yeah! Stop giving this oxygen press!

Wait...

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Re: Stop giving this twat press.

I would call his story "Counter Productive" to any of us who aren't egotistical narcissists with no morals.......

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Stop giving this twat press.

It's that rare occasion where I totally agree with Jake.

Julian Assange seems only interested in Julian Assange. Also, he's on the run from one of the countries in the world where he is most likely to receive a fair trial, and in the event that he is guilty would have the 'nicest' jail time. To make it worse, it's with cock and bull stories about how he'll be spirited away by America, nothing to do with his own cowardices.

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@AC 08:31 (was: Re: Stop giving this twat press.)

"It's that rare occasion where I totally agree with Jake."

It's the constant occasion where I don't give a rat's ass about AC's comments. If you can't stand on your own two feet, hold your head up, and actually attempt to become a personalty, bog off.

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Anonymous Coward

@AC 08:31

That'll teach you!

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Re: Stop giving this twat press.

"Julian Assange seems only interested in Julian Assange."

...and money.

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I've just had a thought, Westminster City Council should be charging him council tax.

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Big Brother

"Assange's Skype appearance at this latest launch crashed repeatedly"

Someone at the NSA having a laugh perhaps?

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WTF?

Re: "Assange's Skype appearance at this latest launch crashed repeatedly"

Why was he using NSA Messenger at all? Deeply puzzling.

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g e
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If he were a senator though

Would he not get diplomatic immunity ?

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FAIL

Re: If he were a senator though

No. He would be a politician, not a diplomat.

God (or whatever deity/non deity you do or don't believe in) save us if it became impossible to prosecute politicians.

Although ignoring the twat would be a better option.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: If he were a senator though

Because he wouldn't be a diplomat, also he should look up Bobby Sands if he thinks that British justice will allow people to get away with their crimes and walk free, just by being elected to office.

Julian seems to be trying to equal Prince in the 90s for sheer delusional behaviour: "If I'm a senator, I get away with skipping justice" is along the same lines of "If I change my name to a symbol, I'll get out of my contract."

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Re: If he were a senator though

Would he not get diplomatic immunity ?

g e,

There is is a persistent misunderstanding here. You can't award yourself diplomatic immunity. You have to be given it, from the country you're going to. Although I believe there may be some exceptions for the UN, for example I don't think the USA are allowed to block visitors to HQ in New York, because the UN has granted the immunity.

So Assange can only get immunity if the British government give it to him. Which they won't. Once granted, the only option is to declare someone persona non grata, and then they have to leave the country. Although immunity can be waived by their own government or ambassador.

There's no way for Ecuador to get Assange out, without breaking the Vienna Conventions that protect their embassy. Although there's also no sanctions built in, so the only cost would be to get a nasty note from the Foreign Office, have diplomats expelled, or diplomatic relations broken off (which would be overkill). And the legal advice to the FCO is probably that they can't make a deal to let him leave, as a court has already ruled he's off to Sweden. So unless they do a deniable deal, and turn a blind eye - Ecuador are stuck with him until they back down and kick him out - or risk escalating a diplomatic annoyance into a full-blown row. As the police have a legal obligation to arrest him, and the government have no legal right to overrule the Met in operational matters, doing a naughty little deal would have a massive chance of becoming public. The Met and the government aren't on good terms.

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Megaphone

Re: If he were a senator though

he should look up Bobby Sands if he thinks that British justice will allow people to get away with their crimes and walk free, just by being elected to office."

Absolutely correct. If you want to walk free, you have to already be in elected office before you commit your crimes.

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Re: If he were a senator though

"There's no way for Ecuador to get Assange out, without breaking the Vienna Conventions that protect their embassy."

In my dreams HMG/FCO boot all Ecuadorian diplomats on account of "conduct not compatible [...]" and Julie is left there, waiting for the food to run out... ...as the water, gas and electricity are turned off, one by one and Julie eyes another unpredictable UK winter.

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He might be better of being winning as it will raise him to the level of incompetence

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Can I just take this opportunity to thank the Ecuadorians

...for continuing to oversee Assange's confinement. It must be getting rather irritating for them in there now, and shirley someone must have snapped a couple of times having to dodge Assange's washing line of drying underpants when using the loo.

Still. It's all in a good cause. The longer Assange can evade the evil clutches of Satanic Sweden, the better it is for, erm, well I'm not sure really.

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Stop

Re: Can I just take this opportunity to thank the Ecuadorians

I thought I asked you not to call me "shirley".

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Re: Can I just take this opportunity to thank the Ecuadorians

I thought I asked you not to call me "shirley".

.. at least not in public :)

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Happy

Re: Can I just take this opportunity to thank the Ecuadorians

"I thought I asked you not to call me "shirley"."

Some men named Shirley manage to go through life with no difficulty, e.g. Big Daddy and his father, in whose steps he followed as a professional wrestler.

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Anonymous Coward

Diplomatic Immunity and Diplomatic Accreditation are two separate things.

To be a diplomat you must be presented to the host country formally. Those accepted are accredited and afforded immunity. BUT their countries can remove that immunity at any time. A diplomats status can be removed and they can be declared Persona Non Grata by the country they are in, they must then leave.

Happened to a lot of soviets and Americans during the cold war.

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Assange's day will come

Sooner or later he'll decide to leave and eventually he will be caught and prosecuted for his crimes, regardless of ill-informed public opinion by the clueless.

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Re: Assange's day will come

"Sooner or later he'll decide to leave and eventually he will be caught and prosecuted for his crimes, regardless of ill-informed public opinion by the clueless."

Not liking the truth someone has down arrowed you. Ah, cultural relativism, don't you love it?

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A solution

I believe non-diplomatic people travelling on Government business get Limited Diplomatic Immunity, they certainly do in the UK, and I'd guess it's the same for politicians. Perhaps Australia can let him win and ask for him to be given him that, then revoke it when he's on his way to Heathrow.

In exchange we'll let them win the ashes.

No a price to high I think.

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Devil

Re: A solution

That price is appallingly high. It's worth spending £3m every year to keep that loony confined to Ecuador's mansion flat in Knightsbridge, a bit steep but the Met have padded the figure anyway. It's not worth forgoing an Ashes win in order to get him! That's a disgusting thing to say!

There's a chance of a 5-0 slaughter here, with the opportunity to follow them home and do it all over again! This is a once in a lifetime gloating opportunity, and we might even make their captain cry and resign again. Haven't managed that since the 80s...

The Ashes is far more important than Julian Assange.

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Id let him stay there a while yet, its saving so much of the tax payers money that would be spent on security and detention if he were banged up.

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I hope he wins the Senate seat

Some times the truth bringers are not saints. They are faulty messed up human beings. Considering I am no saint myself I'm not about to cast stones. I don't care who brings the truth to the masses just so long as we do finally find out what the elite in this world are doing to us and trying to hide. I would love to see this human being get that Senate seat. I would also like to see him and others like him who expose the corruption and hidden truths that are kept from us to have the freedom we all wish to have.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: I hope he wins the Senate seat

"truth bringers .. brings the truth to the masses .. elite .. hidden truths .. freedom"

What took you so long? Was the people's front of Judea caught out on a day off? I think you left out "prevail", "conspiracy" and "evil", and "sandals" and "socks" - no, wait, different checklist.

BTW, "hidden truths" are by default "kept from us", that's sort of the meaning of the word "hidden".

Have a nice day monitoring the Innertubes for more Assange™ news.

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Re: I hope he wins the Senate seat

"What took you so long? Was the people's front of Judea caught out on a day off?"

Funnily it reminds me of Tom Sharpe's "Wilt" series, especially the one with many different 'liberation' organisations taking people hostage in Wilt's house... ...ranging from the mad Baggish to an IRA imposter. Sharpe had his finger on the satirical pulse. What a pity he is not here to send up Julie, whose predicament is made for the treatment meted out by him, ranging from his days in Iceland, through to Sweden and then the flight to England. The manor house in which he stayed on discharge from the prison in which he was rightly incarcerated as a flight risk, living with owner/a former society serviceman cum journalist would lend itself to the satirical furniture backdrop, as would the host - I think here of the man who, having stuck his todger into a condom laced with caustic soday, sticks it into a beef mincer in an effort to relieve the pain, whilst a dog high on acid sinks its teeth into his ankles.

The book would properly speaking have to start with Assange's childhood, which is also ripe satirical material, as is the maternal creature.

I think that I'll get typing then.

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Re: I hope he wins the Senate seat

Oooooooh! I found another Wilt reader!

Funnily it reminds me of Tom Sharpe's "Wilt" series, especially the one with many different 'liberation' organisations taking people hostage in Wilt's house... ...ranging from the mad Baggish to an IRA imposter. Sharpe had his finger on the satirical pulse.

Oh God, yes. It would at least brought some entertainment. And it would explain the poor state of the condom, with that rosebush & all. Maybe we could get Julie to use a plaster? Sjeez, thanks for this one..

I must admit that I don't quite know how I managed to get through the first book of the Wilt series because it was paced slower than the subsequent ones, but boy oh boy oh boy, they were funny. I haven't actually read anyone since the late Tom Sharpe who could create such rib-aching disasters from a mix of originally innocuous and innocent circumstances and intent. And inspector Flint. Hahaha. Epic.

Thanks for the memories :)

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Smoke and mirrors

Truth is like a snake, its slipper and hides out of sight at the slightest risk of danger.You really are deluding yourself if you consider what is in the press or published on the internet as total truth,its all smoke and mirrors designed to hide events and change whats written in the history books.

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Coat

Re: Smoke and mirrors

"Truth is like a snake, its slipper and hides out of sight at the slightest risk of danger."

Does it wear a condom?

I'll take my coat, the very old and worn combat jacket. Thank.

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Re: Smoke and mirrors

You really are deluding yourself if you consider what is in the press or published on the internet as total truth,its all smoke and mirrors designed to hide events and change whats written in the history books.

Arachnoid,

Take off the tinfoil hat old chap. I wouldn't disagree too much with your statement if you removed that word designed. Then we could agree that truth is hidden, very complicated and incredibly hard to pin down.

Wikileaks didn't really reveal anything we didn't already know. The diplomatic cables confirmed that sometimes diplomats and governments don't say what they really think about foreign policy - and also often negotiate with unpleasant regimes. Say it ain't so! You ought to have had that figured out once you started doing history at school. There's no excuse for not already knowing that by the time you're 18.

The Afghan war logs showed us that civilians get killed in wars. Sometimes by accident, sometimes deliberately. Again, you should have known that already. I don't recall a single case being highlighted of NATO screwing up and killing civilians that was covered up.

So what truth has St Julian unveiled to the world? That some guys who fly Apache helicopters make tasteless comments as they shoot at people milling around with guns (and it turns out an RPG), because they were afraid they had an RPG, and so might get shot down, and were covering it with bravado. Again what did that reveal? Other than Wikileaks point of view, by calling it 'Collateral Murder', and worryingly dodgy ethics by editing the version they put on Youtube...

Truth is complicated. We don't know everything. We should be sceptical of government, media and also historians and internet comments. As I said, you shouldn't need Assange to tell you that, not once you're past 16, or at the very latest, 18.

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Truth is like a snake

True. It did sort of start with a trouser snake, no?

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"ethicist and commentator"

Ah, so now we have a new title for people with no actual skills who find themselves in the limelight.

No doubt this lady will have a brilliant career doing nothing useful whatsoever beyond blabbering on talk shows.

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Australian law

I wonder if Dr Cannold has actively renounced her US citizenship ? Section 44 of the Australian Constitution is very explicit in the matter and the High Court in Sykes v Cleary [1992] HCA 60; (1992) 176 CLR 77 (25 November 1992) touched upon its problems (though Cleary was disqualified on another ground before the question of his UK citizenship was answered so it was moot though discussed).In the case of Sue v Hill [1999] HCA 30; 199 CLR 462; 163 ALR 648; 73 ALJR 1016 (23 June 1999) because Hill had failed to positively renounce her UK citizenship before the time of the election she was disqualified.

The US and Australia allow dual citizenship in certain cases. Australia does not allow such for its members of Parliament (or other "offices of profit under the crown")

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