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back to article Jiggy Pennsylvania couple busted by 25 bike cops

A Pennsylvania couple have been cuffed after apparently picking a very unfortunate moment to engage in an al fresco coupling. The luckless pair were arrested by not one, not two, but a whopping 25 bike coppers. According to this report, Richard McBride, 37, and Jennifer Harvey, 41, were spending time in a softball field bench in …

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Brain bleach required

Remove the effing link or put a warning on it, it's not suitable for humanity

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Unhappy

Re: Brain bleach required

My eyes, my eyes...

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Re: Brain bleach required

Or at least just give us the Playmobil version...

Hmm, we need a "Playmobil or it didn't happen" icon here. Then again perhaps it would be better if it hadn't.

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Re: Brain bleach required

I didn't click the link on my first read through the article, but then I read the comments and went back to check it out.

Now I know there is no God.

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Coat

Re: Brain bleach required

Is that Ashley Cole? That Cheryl's let herself go...

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Brain bleach required

While my first reaction was not unlike yours (hence no downvote), the second was a bit more...measured: we're all humans, and 99.9% of us do not look at all like pornstars. Don't we all reserve a bit of love rather than cuffing by 25 bike plods? Unless they all wanted to join the fun?

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Alien

@ Great Bu

Rather, if there is a god, it is a cruel and sadistic one.

<--- my face after clicking link. Nearly saw my pain au raisin for the second time this morning.

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Re: Brain bleach required

No wonder he was behind her!

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Re: @ Great Bu

Or even more appropriately, if there is a god maybe he decided like other posters have said that the universe should be spared the horror of the offspring and nudged the 25 cycloplods towards them.

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Happy

Re: Brain bleach required

"Now I know there is no God."

On the upside.

Ugly people get laid too.

But that's why they call it "Doing the nasty."

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Re: Brain bleach required

I didn't click the link because while I hovered over it 'gawker' appeared.

That's a good enough reason to not click on *any* link as far as I'm concerned. :/

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Re: Brain bleach required

That was a very similar experience to goatse.cx

Unpleasant.

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Re: Brain bleach required

... or put a warning on it

"Not Safe For Any Environment"

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Brain bleach required

I am not sure at all that "love" is the word you are looking for. Love is a bit more than a plug finding a socket.

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Alert

Re: Brain bleach required

I am traumatized for life.

DO NOT FOLLOW THE LINK. DO NOT FOLLOW THE LINK.

You have been warned.

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Re: Brain bleach required

Almost lost my lunch.

I'd have arrested em too..

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Re: Brain bleach required

With all these warnings I'm genuinely curious about the link now.

Dare I click on it?

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Anonymous Coward

Re: @ Great Bu

Hey, I bet she'd be a bit of a looker if she lost a few pounds... ok maybe not :-\

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Re: @ Craig 28

But what does God use for Brain Bleach?

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Maybe there is a God.....

.....on further consideration, she does look like she might be related to Cthulhu......

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Childcatcher

What has been seen cannot be unseen...

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Unhappy

"What has been seen cannot be unseen..."

True.

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Down the rabbit hole

There is always Absinth, Vodka or a mix to your own liking..

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Stop

They also should have been held up on a charge of being too grotesque to procreate.

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When only one cop shows up it's chance. Multiply it by 25 and it means the universe itself is trying to prevent a rip in the continuum.

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Childcatcher

Pictures or...

Judging from the responses of my peers, I take it the usual call for "pictures or it didn't happen" is not required. Indeed, it sounds like "no pictures so it didn't happen" is more appropriate.

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Happy

Got them bang to rights...

Like I said..

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Coat

...and they'll have her up before the Bench

I was leaving anyway!

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Good Lord, oh the manatee!

As above.

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Re: Good Lord, oh the manatee!

Is that a reference to: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/04/target-manatee-gray-color_n_3013235.html

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Happy

Re: Good Lord, oh the manatee!

Oh, the huge-manatee ...!

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WTF?

Beasteality ?

Holy sweaty hambeast batman that surely contravenes multiple laws.

The only one laughing is that guys guide dog!

Cue the compensation claims from the plod traumatised by that event.....

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Re: Beasteality ?

That's an interesting one.

What's the legal definition of "human" and does porking a Hutt qualify as bestiality?

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Re: Beasteality ?

Hmmm, I'd probably put a WH40K spin on it and go with Xeniality for loving aliens, derived from "xeno".

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Cor

But whatever the aesthetic merits of the couple or of one of its members in particular, the funny thing is, whenever there are cops around and they see something they disapprove of (a) they "get shocked", (b) they arrest. They don't point and laugh or snigger or take a picture, or say: "naughty, naughty". They arrest. And if there's no offence that fits the act, they make one up out of bits of other offences.

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Re: Cor

On the upside.

For the first time in a long time - no tasering.

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IT Angle

..."There's a bench, she is bent over the bench and our friend is behind her with his pants down to his ankle, banging away."...

It's nice to know that there's a park bench somewhere which hasn't been vandalised by the local kids and then removed by 'Leisure Services'...

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Frankly ...

... if I were a Cop[1] and came across something like this ... and there were no innocent bystanders to behold the details ... I'd salute & ride on ;-)

Sex is a GOOD thing, as long as it doesn't frighten the children, dawgs, horses & ignorant.

Now, in a heavily populated area ... perhaps not so much. This doesn't look populated.

To the idiots griping about the looks of the enamored pair (I haven't, and will not, visit the link), humans come in all kinds of shapes & sizes. Love is blind. And trust me, you'll never boink Paris ... Although why anyone would want to is beyond me (bag of hammers, anyone?).

[1] I'm not. I breed & train Cop dawgs & horses, though ... and I'm pretty certain that most of the handlers I pass my critters on to would agree with me.

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Coat

Re: Frankly ...

Love is blind.

I reckon its sense of touch must a bit ropey too.

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Re: Frankly ...

The only problem with that is it only takes one of those 25 cops to complain later that a crime (technically that was, no matter how ridiculous) was witnessed and nobody did anything about it, and there's always that one guy

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"There they are, on the first base line," Chitwood said.

Nope, they're definitely beyond first base.

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Holmes

Re: "There they are, on the first base line," Chitwood said.

All your base are belong to us.

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Alien

Re: "There they are, on the first base line," Chitwood said.

All your base are belong to us.

And in this case, you're welcome to them...

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I followed the link

Now I'm not sure which one was over the bench.

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Coffee/keyboard

Re: I followed the link

Dammit! Evil Graham! (see icon)

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Anonymous Coward

omfg

Them coppers must be traumatised seeing that pair at it. I feel a claim coming on.......

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got wood

Must have been one strong effing bench.....

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Limeys!!

It's spelled D-A-R-B-Y. A derby is a hat.

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Re: Limeys!!

What the hell is a destruction derby then?

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