back to article Applicants sought for one-way trip to Martian Big Brother house

A Netherlands-based non-profit group called Mars One is seeking video applications from pioneers willing to take a one-way trip to Mars and become stars in a new interplanetary reality show. "This will be the biggest thing that humanity has ever done. In 15 years people will still be watching," Mars One's co-founder Bas Lansdorp …

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Pirate

history again...

just send the convicts!!

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Re: history again...

No send actual BB constestants. Getting kicked out of the house into non breathable atmosphere will make eviction night much more exciting...

On the plus side, bogans are like cockroaches so the radiation isn't likely to kill them.

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A new TV series...

Fantasy Island....

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Anonymous Coward

Re: A new TV series...

Holy cow could yo uimagine it? While you're on mars you could KILL EVERYBODY!!!

Why would you do that? No law! it isn't owned by anyone you could murder all you want REDRUM REDRUM

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JDX
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Re: history again...

The people need to be physically and mentally sound... BB are out.

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Rob
Go

Re: history again...

On that basis, so's a large chunk of the population.

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FAIL

Reality TV fail

How are they going to balance the intelligent, mentally stable people they'd need for a mission like this who don't normally make good reality TV subjects with the moronic, egotistical, mental trainwrecks who are normally chosen for reality TV programmes?

I'm sure if watching astronauts training made good reality TV either NASA or the Russians would have done it years ago to boost funds.

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Happy

Re: Reality TV fail

It is for a TV show so you don't want mentally stable people, you want the crazy asshole that will open the airlock. Besides, there are huge chances that anyone young enough & sad enough to sign up for a one way trip to Mars will (hopefully) have found happiness 15 years from now and will not want to leave all that behind.

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Re: Reality TV fail

But if the crazy asshole opens the airlock won't that be the end of the show? Not sayin' that would be bad but if it happens early there are going to be some upset sponsors.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Reality TV fail

You just need to tell them they'll be collected on another space shuttle.... Then forget to send it...

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Ru
WTF?

Re: Reality TV fail

How are they going to balance the intelligent, mentally stable people they'd need for a mission like this

Even if they start out as intelligent and stable, they won't stay that way long once they've been exiled to a caravan on an airless freezing ball of rock with three other human beings as their only company for the rest of their lives.

If there's no plan to retrieve any colonists, they'd better send quite a few more than that at a time.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Reality TV fail

> But if the crazy asshole opens the airlock won't that be the end of the show?

There'll always be someone on the team who's smuggled an AK47 onto the ship, reday to blow away any dirty commie who opens the airlock or criticizes the flag. Probably disguised as a nun or something.

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Gimp

Re: Reality TV fail

How are they going to balance the intelligent, mentally stable people they'd need for a mission like this

Well, that would not be necessary Mr. President. It could easily be accomplished with a computer. And a computer could be set and programmed to accept factors from youth, health, sexual fertility, intelligence, and a cross section of necessary skills. Of course it would be absolutely vital that our top government and military men be included to foster and impart the required principles of leadership and tradition. Slams down left fist. Right arm rises in stiff Nazi salute. Arrrrr! Restrains right arm with left. Naturally, they would breed prodigiously, eh? There would be much time, and little to do. But ah with the proper breeding techniques and a ratio of say, ten females to each male, I would guess that they could then work their way back to the present gross national product within say, twenty years.

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Self sustainability will be key. I would not like to be waiting for supply ships. There will be a need to import a whole ecology. Psychology experts could probably tell us the minimum amount of people needed to stop them going mad too.

Hmmm, just a thought, if no one had a cold or flu when they arrived would they be free of it forever more?

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Meh

Unless there is some nasty red planet disease waiting for them?

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Happy

Unless there is some nasty red planet disease waiting for them?

You mean one that turns them into psychopathic monsters? Surely not :)

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Anonymous Coward

Like Nanny from Count Duckula is she?

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Anonymous Coward

even better

can the target audience go also ?

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Re: even better

"can the target audience go also ?"

Let me tell you what I think that the targeted audience should be targeted *with*...

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FAIL

Streaming video,...

except when Mars is in solar conjunction with the Earth ie. obstructed by the Sun. Major fail not to think of this, its not like it didn't happen in the last 3 weeks to the Mars Rovers.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Streaming video,...

I'd be more concerned about it being a one way trip funded by a corporation who you NEED to stay financially viable for the entirety of your life otherwise you'll end up eating your "house mates" and eventually starving/suffocating. That's assuming Jack doesn't start typing out pages of "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy" into a computer first.

Given the attention span of the average human, this may get awesome ratings for the landing, and probably first year or two, but when all they're doing is eating, shitting and sleeping, those ratings are going to drop off rapidly until they start dieing - granted this may be accelerated by the Jack situation.

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Yag

"Given the attention span of the average human..."

Given what happened for the lunar landings, people won't even care for more than a few monthes...

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Streaming video,...

> eating, shitting and sleeping,

I suspect there'd be a 4th activity, especially if they've sent a mixed-sex group. That will always make for good TV, especially if they're of an exhibitionist bent. Dogging on Mars?

The first few folks out there would probably have to agree to compulsory vasectomies, though, or there'd be worrying problems later.

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Bronze badge

Re: Streaming video,...

"worrying problems later". I think the worry is now, with the person presenting this idea as an actual thing, and not a film plot. At least behind a camera is safer than giving them a rocket.

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Alien

Re: Streaming video,...

"... especially if they're of an exhibitionist bent."

Wait, I thought that was a prerequisite for getting on these shows. I don't think vasectomies will be necessary as the show is undoubtedly planning on and looking forward to the birth of the first verifiable ET.

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Anonymous Coward

Please, please send Kate Do Nothing Middleton. It'll be so nice to NOT have to live on the same planet as her, plus, she will have to wear the same space suit as everyone else so no more dead trees showing off her ugly mug wearing yet another designer dress she never earned.

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Mars is only about 10% of Earth surface gravity, so kate, posh-spice and the rest of them would float off.

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Boffin

10%?

38%, it says 'ere. So they'd need a fairly robust kick up the arse to help them on their way.

GJC

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JDX
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I think the AC is a better nomination, get rid of all the bitter little idiots.

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Re: 10%?

Yes, sorry it's 10% Earth's mass, 38% Earth's 'g' - read the wrong column

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WTF?

after the die-off

Wonder how they plan to deal with the backlash if the whole crew dies en route or shortly after arriving? It would be the end of the show at least, will the broadcasters be wanting their money back?

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Trollface

Re: after the die-off

They just shoot it in a studio like last time

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Joke

Yeh, as with ......

Capricorn One

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Facepalm

It would be great

Until the target audience was distracted by the next shiny thing or PR stunt....oooh look, celebrity X has a baby bump!

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or... they'll just cash in on the 'were going to....' and it'll never actually happen.

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Headmaster

Shhhh. You'll put 90% of the market out of jobs once they realize all these scams... ahem, projects.

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On the more positive note ...... what IT can do for you ... and all that are yours to favour

I have no doubt that we could physically place a human being on Mars. Whether they'd be able to survive for an extended period of time is much more doubtful.…… Dr Veronica Bray

That depends Entirely, Mistress Veronica, on what they be doing together and what IT Generates and ITERates as the Virtual Realities to be Followed for Earthly Pleasures in Heavenly Treasured Deep Driver Information with SMARTR IntelAIgent Supply.

And that takes Us All into Immediate Virtual Teleportation Territory which is where one is spoiled rotten for choice in every luscious sin that is not vice …..and therefore Satisfaction is LOVE's Great IntelAIgent Game.

And what Delivers One LOVE in Live Operational Virtual Environments? Global Operating Devices Sharing Real Dreams, in Plain Text for Magic Pirate Pictures in Fine Private Hands…….. with Programs CodeX-XSSXXXX Triggers an ESPecially Immersive Program to Master and Enjoy, Mentor and Monitor …….. Virtually Driver Oneself.

Hmmm? That would provide Spontaneous Instantaneous Remote Control Facility with All Orbiting Satellite Stations Communicating with Earth Base through Mars One Station X-XSSXXXX

Wow, what delivers LOVE in Live Operational Virtual Environments is the Right Stuff and a Great Idea for Colossal Atlas Thought and Virtual Program Realisation.

Second Nature and Normal to Martians does sort of dictate a Sweet Sticky Surrender and Submission to Pleasures with Alien Treasure Holders in Universally Strange Space Arrangements.

Of course, if one realises that the concept/show is a military program spin off, does such ensure and assure and insure one of civilian success in the rendering for realisation of complex conceptual actualities and New Future WorldZ Virtual AIMachine ProgramMING?

Which all says quite a lot, in quite a confined space, and that sort of thing tends towards situations and/or predicaments being volatile and explosive. :-)

All in all, done properly is it guaranteed to be a huge market hit routing stocks and shares putting big business in panic and turmoil.

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Anonymous Coward

Prior art?

Sounds like someone has got hold of a copy of Red Mars by Kim Stanley Robinson.

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Re: Prior art?

Not really. In Robinson's Mars trilogy, the first settlers were sent as a classic governement-funded mission, with US and Russia jointly running it, and there was no 24h reality TV involved (although the crew was expected to prepare broadcasts to Earth, just like current NASA etc. astronauts). On the other hand, the book is so old the Big Brother show had not yet been invented.

As one of the few less-credible details in the otherwise rock-hard sci-fi book series, the ship the settlers travel on sounded like a luxury cruise liner, compared to what has actually been planned, there was even space for a garden, and a stowaway traveller...

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So let me get this straight ...

... HOW many billion dollars, exactly, to park a few un-trained idiots ex-planet, just to watch 'em die? If anybody is actually stupid enough to be willing to go on such a suicide mission, I'm pretty certain that building a sound-stage, and then offing them here on Terra, would be a piece of cake ... for a lot less money. And the fucking idiots involved would probably actually believe they were dying on Mars ... as would the morons in the audience.

Does anyone, anywhere, still believe that over-produced, over hyped, so-called "reality-TV" is un-scripted?

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Re: So let me get this straight ...

"... HOW many billion dollars, exactly, to park a few un-trained idiots ex-planet, just to watch 'em die?"

Exactly. Bring back roman games I say, but with HD coverage. I'd even subscribe to Sky if they had Friday night gladitorial combat live from Millwall Colosseum. Now that wouldn't cost billions, and I bet there would be no shortage of people wanting a piece of the action.

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Re: So let me get this straight ...

Considerably less than the 100,billions of $$$ the US spends on "amateur" college football so that a bunch of testosterone cases can run around a filed chasing a bit of leather watched by fatter drunk testosterone cases

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What's in it for me?

I f I were to be a wannabe Martian and be lucky enough to be chosen, the sponsors are going to be making billions allowing the world population to watch me taking a dump on Mars; what will I be getting out of the one way trip to a planet with nothing on it to buy? Other than the opportunity to make one small dump for a man, one great (potential) environmental impact for Marskind.

I suppose guaranteed payments to the family back on Earth might make it interesting but going to spend the rest of your life, however long or short that may be, in the depths of space or on aplanet without a breathable atmosphere with 3 people you may come to hate would need pretty good compensation.

After all fame is not much use if you are not around to enjoy it.

And would I have any say about the opposite sex accompanying me, as the general concensus now is that such a journey should have a mixed crew?

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Happy

Re: What's in it for me?

Isn't an assured place in the history books enough? Later on they will probably even name Martian cities after the first settlers. But if that does not turn you on, don't go.

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Alien

Re: What's in it for me?

I don't know how they would screen the people, but I hope they ensure its a 50:50 split male to female, and preferably couples...

Can you imagine what would happen on a one way trip with only 1 woman but 3 men?

anyone going should be going with the mind they are going to start the colonisation of mars!

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Anonymous Coward

Re: What's in it for me?

> only 1 woman but 3 men?

It would be a hell of a lot worse with 3 women and 1 man. That might seem fun at first (for the man), but after a few months...

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Anonymous Coward

Re: What's in it for me? @AC

I suspect a single woman say no to 3 men wanting sex daily... and even if the woman is up for it... would she be able to cope???

But a man? well no straight man would refuse 3 women taking advantage of him... sure it MIGHT get a bit sore on occasion, but there are plenty of ways to please a woman...

Plus for reproduction, its better to have 3 wombs available than 1... and sperm can be brought in a freezer for when its needed (to ensure genetic diversity)

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Anonymous Coward

MacroRodent

Just like all those Luna cities? Or is that just speculation on your part?

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