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back to article Strategic SIEGE ROBOTS defeated by 'heavily intoxicated' man, 62

In yet another sign of the continued supremacy - for the moment at least - of humanity over its machines, reports are coming in that a duo of powerful police robots has been bested in combat by an elderly American man who was "heavily intoxicated" at the time after the "strategic" enforcement machines attempted to storm his …

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Happy

One major disadvantage robots have over humans:

People are far less likely to hold their fire when facing down a machine.

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Terminator

Re: One major disadvantage robots have over humans:

I am not certain, the moment the robots come up with more armor than a human, say 30kg*3 and more firepower a M2 (not a puny M60 like Rambo) people may think twice.

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Anonymous Coward

Sense of déjà vu

In the UK we are probably more likely to kill the robot with a golf club, tennis racquet or cricket bat as we don't have ready access to automatic weaponry and 1000's of rounds of ammunition.

Can't wait for the report from America when one of these is destroyed by an RPG7 or other anti-tank weapon that the American householder happenes to have stashed under his bed. Now that would be news.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Sense of déjà vu

Quote: "Can't wait for the report from America when one of these is destroyed by an RPG7"

That's Bulgaria, not America. I am to lazy to dig, but you can find it yourself - we had a guy arrested for threatening his in-law with a shoulder launched missile inside an apartment. He would have won the Darwin award if he used it of course and taken half of the apartment block with him too.

In fact I know how he got it (not first hand, this got retold a few times)- he used to trade books (I actually bought some from him a couple of times). When the ex-soviet block collapsed so did the trade which opened the opportunity for individuals doing blockade runs in vans and trucks to buy and sell goods. Funnily enough books were one of those as Russia was still printing the most accessible tech literature at very low prices too so they commanded a healthy margin.

So on one of his runs, somewhere near the Romanian border inside todays Moldavia a guy walks onto the road in front of his van with an AK47 and collects a "toll" - 50 bucks. Being a psycho (and ex-special forces) our "hero" stashes a handgun in the truck for the next run. On the next run he unpacks the gun ~ 100 km from the border and prepares himself. Same place, different guy walks in front of the truck - this time with a shoulder launched missile. Asks for 80 bucks. The driver grudgingly digs into his pockets (with a weapon like that it you really do not want to risk the dead-man trigger). After which the guy with the missile hands him the weapon and says "Thanks, nice doing business with you".

A few years down the road the same missile was (nearly) used in a domestic incident.

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Thumb Up

Re: Sense of déjà vu

That...is hilarious.

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Re: One major disadvantage robots have over humans:

A problem that robots will always have is that they (or their operators) do not have a reasonable claim to self-defence. If police officers go in and get shot at, they can reasonably shoot back to defend their lives. If a robot gets shot at, they have no "life" as such to defend, so they (or their operators) are less likely to shoot back unless they become aware of an actual threat to a life. The robot is mainly going to end up being used for reconnaissance, trying to talk the guy down, or at best a tasering. Taser vs bullets, I'd bet on the bullets.

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Go

Re: Sense of déjà vu

Threatening the in-laws with a shoulder launched missile? Sorry, but that's bringing a knife to a gunfight. The guy should be applauded for his restraint.

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Mushroom

Re: Sense of déjà vu

"Can't wait for the report from America when one of these is destroyed by an RPG7 or other anti-tank weapon that the American householder happenes to have stashed under his bed. Now that would be news."

No doubt will a statement along the lines of

"Hey, the 2nd amendment allows me to bear arms in the defense of my home. It don't way what arms I can carry, right?"

Of course you know it's only a matter of time before one of them has one something bigger stashed under their bed. At which point it really will be a case of "There goes the neighbourhood"

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Sense of déjà vu

« In fact I know how he got it (not first hand, this got retold a few times)- he used to trade books »

Looks like he's got a head start on Mr. Bezos on the trade diversifying front.

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Pirate

Re: Sense of déjà vu

Not that I know, but I heard of $100 US-type rocket launchers back in the late 80's - would not be surprised at all - too much for a copbot though, more of an entire house item.

;)

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Stop

Re: Sense of déjà vu

In the UK we are probably more likely to kill the robot with a golf club

Not my bloody clubs you don't. Not unless you can find the old steel set in the garage.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Sense of déjà vu

Um, no, in the U.K. you are more likely to kill the robot with a long, lethal kitchen knife. That's how how you blokes like to kill each other without guns. A bit sloppier, as it takes longer to bleed out from a knife wound, which is why the U.K. has one of the highest violent crime rates in the civilized world.

Oh, wait. Now there's a movement to to ban long kitchen knives in the U.K., too (no joke). What WILL you use to satisfy your homicidal tendencies next?

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Re: Sense of déjà vu

[Broadcast Eclear, sent 1362068630.6]

xGSV Slightly Perturbed

o(unknown) Anonymous Coward

> What WILL you use to satisfy your homicidal tendencies next?

Sharpened spoons perhaps. Humanity's creativity knows no bounds.

They're pretty awesome when they're not killing each other.

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Pint

Re: Sense of déjà vu for a déjà vu

never gets old, or new, or whaever...

http://xkcd.com/419/

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Devil

Re: Sense of déjà vu

" which is why the U.K. has one of the highest violent crime rates in the civilized world."

Funny how "violent crime" and "homicide" are different. See, *because* knives are less lethal, there may be more *attempted* homicides but far fewer *successful* homicides. The difference is that in one of these, they can fix you up and put you back on the street, raising your kids or *whatever* it is you do in life (selling coke and stabbing people perhaps, after your lengthy prison term). The end consequences are different, as a result.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Sense of déjà vu

UNODC murder rates per year per 100,000 population

USA 4.8

India 3.4

Israel 2.1

Canada 1.6

UK 1.2

Egypt 1.2

France 1.1

Australia 1.0

China 1.0

Italy 0.9

Germany 0.8

Japan 0.4

Iceland 0.3

Hong Kong 0.2

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Sense of déjà vu

I don't think it's to do with availability of guns at all, it's just violent culture.

As in, TV, films etc. The worship of stylised ultra-violence above all else.

Canada and Switzerland have just as many guns ..... many countries have whole populations that have to do national service and pretty much all know how to use a gun, but don't.

TV cop films look increasingly like braindead fascists in trendy designer clothes ....

and as for army-themed films .... well, Leni Riefenstahl springs to mind, especially the more "sophisticated" recent films.

With the possible honorable exception of Jarheads, at least they tried to show it as it is.

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Thumb Up

Re: Sense of déjà vu

TV cop films look increasingly like braindead fascists in trendy designer clothes ....

Yeah like the way the 'heros' are depicted pressurising employees to reveal customer details "Because you don't want the hassle of us with a warrant" or the classic "I think I heard a noise inside, we'd better go in".

I bet half the the audience just nods its head sagely thinking 'Anything to catch the plebs'. 'Cause of course the officers only do it when they know the perp is guilty anyway.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: One major disadvantage robots have over humans:

"If a robot gets shot at, they have no "life" as such to defend."

But then the guy adds one to his tab, something on the line of "destruction of public property" or "attempt to dest...." or something like it, right? Resisting arrest is already there, right?

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Re: One major disadvantage robots have over humans:

If people expend their good, AP-ammo, on the robot, then the robot has done it's job.

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Re: Sense of déjà vu

As in, TV, films etc. The worship of stylised ultra-violence above all else.

If that holds, then Indonesia should cook off pretty nicely then! I just watched this movie, "The Raid: Redemption" http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1899353/ -> Solid Action, decent acting - and - stuck on "Ultra Violence" all the way, maybe 10 minutes of soppy'ness in total. Japan is big on tentacle rape - e.t.c.

I don't think media drives it. Someone proposed lead poisoning as the hidden driver behind US violence.

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Gold badge
Thumb Down

Re: Sense of déjà vu

"Um, no, in the U.K. you are more likely to kill the robot with a long, lethal kitchen knife. That's how how you blokes like to kill each other without guns. A bit sloppier, as it takes longer to bleed out from a knife wound, which is why the U.K. has one of the highest violent crime rates in the civilized world."

And too scared to post with your name on a UK website.

That's a ROTLFAO moment.

But seriously do you know anything about murder and crime rates in the G20?

But recently I heard Americans are trying to do something about this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xr8PQDoZXSo

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Gold badge
Unhappy

Downvoted because...

"At which point it really will be a case of "There goes the neighbourhood""

To be clear that is "There goes the neighbourhood" in the sense of being converted into a cloud of radioactive dust.

I suppose the other reason would be the notion it suggests America is a country full of trigger happy nut jobs will will inevitably graduate to home nukes.

To which I would say either accept that's how parts of the world views you or do something about it.

The choice is entirely yours.

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Bronze badge

Violence in the street

@ anonymous, knife wielding troll.

No one's going to ban long knives, how would our dear Queen knight someone if she couldn't hit him with a sword. It's the carrying of dangerous items, such as long knives, in a public place with intent to use as an offensive weapon* that is illegal - as it is in other European countries and probably also in the US of A.

Yes, punch-ups and such have been remarked on by shocked visitors to Blighty for a long time. Probably not a good characteristic but nevertheless we do seem to actually kill fewer of our people than some other civilisations.

* something like that - IANAL.

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Silver badge

I thought common practice was to burn down the house, no?

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Mushroom

Alternatively

Nuke from orbit, it's the only way to be sure!

;-)

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obviously the rules of engagement

were wrong. Preserving fleshy bits should be a much lower priority.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: obviously the rules of engagement

fleshy bits? yeah, fried burgers on the menu!

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Terminator

Re: obviously the rules of engagement

"were wrong. Preserving fleshy bits should be a much lower priority."

This error will be corrected in due course.

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Silver badge

Re: obviously the rules of engagement

fried burgers on the menu!

First read that as 'fried burglars'.

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Coffee/keyboard

Re: obviously the rules of engagement

So that's what chex mix and cola smell like. And now, I need a new keyboard.

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Silver badge

Siege Robots may need redesign

How about something more disarming - like a mini skirt.

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Happy

Re: Siege Robots may need redesign

>mini skirt

Robot Whores?

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Silver badge

Re: Robot Whores?

I think the Japanese have a head start on you there.

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Terminator

Alternative solution

Rather than spray these robots with bullets it might make more sense to spray them with "paint" or drape a towel overs their eyes ( webcam).....

Blinding a robot renders it ll but useless **.

**( Unless they are also equiped with volumetric, heat detection or vibration detection sensors, then you would have to push them over or short circuit them)

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Terminator

Re: Alternative solution

Nutritional paste to the eye stalk or a fetching rubbery cloak over the top have proved to be effective in the past- or was it the future?

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Terminator

Re: Alternative solution

It could work, but then you'd have to put up with it screaming "MY VISION IS IMPAIRED!" whilst it sprays the area with weapons fire...

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Bronze badge

Re: Alternative solution

How to blind a man in power armour: sneak up behind him and wrap your bra around his helmet.

It's out there, but I shall let you have the fun of using Google for yourself.

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Happy

Re: Alternative solution

You've got to throw a towel over it. If it's a part #223219B (aka 'Colin'), then the next thing you need to do is rewrite it's pleasure circuits, and it will do whatever you want.

To be a frood, you've really got to know where your towel is.

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Re: Alternative solution

Or, tip it over. Funnier still, grab it and spin it around so it's facing the door that its backup handlers will shortly have to storm through.

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Thumb Up

Re: Alternative solution

That works for a man not in power armour....

the bra around the face is a big disarmer.....

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Valid tactics

Being 'heavily intoxicated' may be a very good way of gaining an advantage over the machines. Their internal assessment and prediction algorithms wouldn't be able to cope well with a drunken adversary.

"Dad, the machines are coming." "Ok son, take the whiskey bottle to your mother and bring me the crystal meth."

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Valid tactics

I see a dark robot in the front garden

Moved by a black squad that drive the gun

Bring me my bourbon and methamphetamine

Bring me my golden shot of a skag

...

Tune in to a Jethro Tull song ;-)

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Re: Valid tactics

Was this ever actually tried in say an episode of Doctor Who? I'm not too well versed in the Whoniverse, being a Star Trek fan myself, but the incident piques my curiosity to wonder if a Dalek or two just couldn't get their weapons on target because the target kept lurching around drunk.

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Silver badge

Re: Valid tactics

"THE...HUMANOID....IS HUGGING....ME! HUGGING ME!!"

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Mushroom

Re: Valid tactics

Indeed so.

It's difficult to get inside a guy's OODA loop if it happens to be on a totally 'nother frikkin' planet.

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Machines as dull

as their operators will never match the chaotic paranoia that a fine bender produces.

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Re: Machines as dull

Going berserk as a warrior served a similar purpose against human opponents in the past.

Could well work against robots (and perhaps also Vulcans, or anybody else thinking logically)

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Paris Hilton

Stop being so dramatic

You're trying gin up (if you'll pardon the expression) the story with words like "elderly" and "oldster." The man is a mere 62. He (like myself) is just reaching his prime robot-fighting years.

(Paris because she, too, is no longer a spring chicken.)

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Re: Stop being so dramatic

That's going on my next tee-shirt!

"Just reaching my prime robot-fighting years"

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