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back to article Twitter translated to LOLCATZ: Strangely this had not been done

If you've got nothing better to do than faff around on Twitter, you're likely to be the sort who will enjoy having your Twitter account translated into Lolcatz, the language. Not your actual tweets, nor the tweets of anyone else, but just the various commands and buttons that furnish the page around the tweets. The languages of …

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Facepalm

Our *3*, no, our *4* greatest weaknesses are ...

Please look up "facepalm" in these languages: Catalan, Basque, Spanish, Portugese.

Bonus points: Which one doesn't read like the others?

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Coat

Lolcatz?

I have to admit I was entirely oblivious to this "language" before the particular article. After reading through I believe the only appropriate comment to make is:

I despair ov teh hooman race, we r doomd

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Re: Lolcatz?

Just leaving this here...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LOLCODE

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Re: Lolcatz?

Wot no Pirate option yet? Or Leet?

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Headmaster

Re: Lolcatz?

nah, they're a bunch of loosers

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Re: Lolcatz?

"http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LOLCODE"

Great language with commands such as:

IM IN YR LOOP UPPIN YR VAR

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Trollface

Re: Lolcatz?

That's good, I do like strongly typed languages instead of rubbish like JavaScript.

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Re: Lolcatz?

LOLCODE is fun to give in programming interviews. Most of the interviewees have never seen it. The language is trivial and makes it good to see how the interviewee picks up on new things.

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Re: Lolcatz?

I call it a monument to human ingenuity and persistence.

Mind you, I don't always think very highly of human ingenuity and persistence.

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Sign of the times?

Lolcatz is there, but Klingon isn't.

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Re: Sign of the times?

I was going to demand Klingon but a true warrior. . . . No, I don't have the strength to go on.

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FAIL

By adding LOLCATZ, and not Klingon, Twitter proves it is for the cranially challenged and not for us uber endowed nerds.

Phale.

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Phale?

Don't you mean " vonlu' " ?

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Happy

The Dialectizer - the original web translator

http://www.rinkworks.com/dialect/

eg, this is what the article looks like in Swedish Chet or Hacker

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Re: The Dialectizer - the original web translator

And I here was hoping for a translation into Obscurantist Hegelian Dialect hailing the prussian king and weirding people out for fun and profit.

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Silver badge

Re: The Dialectizer - the original web translator

I miss the 'bork bork' add on for Thunderbird -- especially for those official up-thier-own-bum type emails.

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Happy

Re: The Dialectizer - the original web translator

Thanks for the Swedish Chef link/translation. It was almost like being back home in Sweden reading again.

...

Hey, wait ... I already am.

OK.

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FAIL

Internet memes !!!!!

Are their not already enough illiterate people without adding crap like this.

If nothing else I suppose that it will allow the Chavs to communicate on their own level.

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Headmaster

Re: Internet memes !!!!!

"Are their not already enough illiterate people without adding crap like this."

Yes, 'their' are.

Also, that looked like a question to me. Isn't it missing something at the end there?

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Re: Internet memes !!!!!

I expect this to have been added to gov.uk by the end of the week.

WELCOM 2 GOV.UK

TEH BEST PLACE 2 FIND GUBMENT SERVICEZ AN INFORMASHUN

SIMPLR, CLEARR, FASTR

Hmmm - that IS simpler, clearer and faster

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Re: Internet memes !!!!!

"Chavs"

Ah, the last apparently indentifiable section of society some find refuge in slagging off .

Always good to have a section of society to feel superior t , isn't it.

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Re: Internet memes !!!!!

What the hell is a chav?

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Anonymous Coward

What is a chav?

A guido driving on the left.

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Re: Internet memes !!!!!

"Always good to have a section of society to feel superior t , isn't it."

Sorry, but I'm afraid even cutting sarcasm isn't going to eliminate that particular human tendency.

Besides, I tend to be more concerned by the people - like your good self - who object to the use of the word 'chav' on the basis that we shouldn't be looking down on "a section of society".

If we were talking about ethnicity, or age, or disability, or sex, or sexual orientation, or gender identity, or any of those other characteristics over which people have no personal control, then I'd be right there with you on the moral high ground.

But we're not talking about those things. Being a 'chav' is about behaviour and attitude. I know people make a big thing about 'chavs' wearing hoodies or big hoop earrings, or whatever - defining them by appearance, albeit a chosen appearance - but what it's really about is behaviours and attitudes. 'Chav' generally indicates someone who - in whatever way - rejects the standards of the society they live in but still expects to be supported by it. Someone who demands respect but is generally unwilling to extend it to anyone else.

So when someone comes along and suggests that we should refrain from being judgemental about 'chavs' because we're victimising "a section of society", what they're implying is that a) these people should not be *expected* to behave in a socially responsible way; because b) these people couldn't behave in a socially responsible way even if they wanted to.

There's a parallel assertion that people who criticise 'chavs' are criticising 'the poor' or 'the disadvantaged'. This similarly implies that poorer people can't be socially responsible in their behaviours, and therefore shouldn't be expected to be.

All in all, I think those implications are pretty worrying in themselves. For myself, I believe that almost everyone is capable of conducting themselves in a socially responsible way, so I expect them to do just that - even if it only goes as far as basic politeness, the rejection of violence, and not trying to nick other people's stuff. If people refuse to adhere to those standards, if they reject the need to respect other people, their property and the society they're a part of, then I have no qualms about calling them out on it. (I might not call them 'chav', myself, because it's a tired-out word, but the principle holds.)

By gods. Can we have an icon for "I'm going to talk like a complete pompous arse for far too long", please?

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Anonymous Coward

This is entirely appropriate.

After all, the web exists solely for pussies of one kind or another.

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Facepalm

Sic transit gloria mundi.

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Coat

Your van broke down yesterday?

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Coat

The suspension is knackered, which made Gloria barf.

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Anonymous Coward

Lolcatz more useful...

Hmmm, even Lolcatz is more useful than Galician, Catalan and Basque! Anonymous because I don't want irate speakers of pissant languages to "kill" me ;-)

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Happy

Re: Lolcatz more useful...

speakers of pissant languages

What, you mean like French?

*runs*

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Re: Lolcatz more useful...

" I don't want irate speakers of pissant languages to "kill" me ;-)"

Keeel heem,, keeel heem to death!

Luzer!

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Trollface

Re: Lolcatz more useful...

Translate in all known languages and dialects including Welsh.

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Trollface

MS missing a trick

MS spends a fortune on Localisation every version of OS, tools and applications. But would volunteers add the translations?

Proves that some Twitter users Gullible.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: MS missing a trick

Lolcatisation of Windows?

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FAIL

Wot, nah Biffa?

Had awa' an shite, man!

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Re: Wot, nah Biffa?

Young man, one has no intention in concealing oneself in order to defecate purely at the appearance of your good self.

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Anonymous Coward

I tried to write a filter for Social Networks

I tried to write a filter for Social Networks - I called it "intelligent".

I could never get it to work; for some reason it never output anything.

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Coffee/keyboard

Re: I tried to write a filter for Social Networks

Presumably you think it was working?

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Anonymous Coward

I want to find it funnier than I do...

...but I rather fear the joke is lost on 'yoof' and 'not so yoofs' that aren't net savvy enough re: the cat gag.

This being of course because a frightening percentage of people now text / email / socially networkalise themselves in this manner anyway*. I suppose it would be funnier if I thought potential participants knew how to communicate in any other way.

More a case 'LOLhumans', IMHO.

txtspk was just one in a pantheon of f*ckeries that edged me toward the 'EXIT' sign on Facebook - if such a thing actually exists, and my escape wasn't a hopeful fantasy.

* I had to go back to a correspondent once and request written English. She'd typed exclusively in txtspk, and not even phonetically accurate txtspk for that matter. I literally had no idea what she was trying to say.

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Boffin

Re: I want to find it funnier than I do...

"This being of course because a frightening percentage of people now text / email / socially networkalise themselves in this manner anyway"

People have always used shortcuts and abbreviations. The problem is not in the jots or tittles or particular grammatical constructs or spellings - it is entirely possible to understand these conventions. The problem is that often these people are inarticulate anyway meaning trying to extract sense was always going to be an uphill battle. Unfortunately I don't think that is a problem that would go away simply by eliminating a particular coloquial phonetic construct de jour.

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Re: I want to find it funnier than I do...

People have always used shortcuts and abbreviations.

Indeed. People who think "txtspk" is a novel phenomenon should spend a few hours grubbing about in the archives of their nearest research library. Going through a stack of, say, publishers' chapbooks from the nineteenth century would disabuse them of that notion.

And most of that stuff was handwritten (before the introduction of the typewriter, late 19th C). At least with computers and SMS the glyphs are usually discernible.

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Black Helicopters

A Cunning Plan Perhaps?

Perhaps it's all a cunning plan intended to locate those ignorant enough to both use Twitter and combine it with the desecration of the English language known as "LOLCATZ" (*shudder* I feel unclean from merely typing that!) before unleashing a pogrom against those identified and thereby improving the human genome marginally?

Or maybe I only suspect that because it's very much what I'd consider doing...

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Alien

Re: A Cunning Plan Perhaps?

Nah - iz just for tah LULZ

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Boffin

I R holding out for I_337CAT

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Pint

I miss the app that turned everything in FireFox into Swedish Chef speak, is it still available??

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Anonymous Coward

Of course...

I believe you're looking for the Bork Bork Bork! add on. Unfortunately, it appears to be borken at the moment, and not working with FF 18.0.

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Angel

@Michael Wojcik

Thanks for the Lolcat Bible link. I have a passing acquaintance with the Authorised Version, but it's not nearly as funny.

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