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back to article iPhone queue ‘superficial and pretentious’ says queuing fangirl

Apple Stores have started selling the iPhone 5 in Australia, the country where this kind of thing happens first thanks to accidents of geography and the location of the International Date Line. Your correspondent was there and can report that, in the suburban store he visited, the sale was an orderly affair. Our first encounter …

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MIc
Coat

I'd hit it

that is all

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Bronze badge

Re: I'd hit it

Going by the older one, you'd need to make sure you had protection on it first otherwise it's going to end badly.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: I'd pound that

I'd like to see Amy in her Nurses outfit and some black stockings, plz.

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Silver badge

Re: I'd hit it

Geek girl alert. The blogoshere may approach melt down in the next few days. There is probably already a fan page for her. Mind you she is quite cute.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: I'd hit it

Are you dry-humping your office desk, or does every photo of a woman under the age of 25 elicit this response?

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Anonymous Coward

Re: I'd hit it

We need a side by side photo page to compare with with the Asus eee girl......Oh I am having good thoughts now.....I better go and have a cool beer quickly to calm down.

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Trollface

Re: I'd hit it

I'd say about 80% of the 18-25 age bracket, can't speak for the OP though

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Happy

Re: I'd hit it

LOL - Fancy that - people masturbating over the phone, without any porn on it.

Damn - must be a "Really Great" phone.

Stick to my cheapy basic mobile - cause I want to make calls more that I want to wank over it / wank with it.

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Yawn...

At least they only queued from the night before unlike the iDiots in NY queuing up for 8 days. I assume that there are less obsessive compulsives in Oz, after all it's only a fucking phone, owning one isn't going to change your life.

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Re: Yawn...

But there is a chance media will interview you and you'll be in the papers or on the TV or something!

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Joke

Re: Yawn...

That was the Broadway store... That Apple Store is inside the shopping centre and Centre management wouldn't allow the queueing inside the store.

At the "Standalone" Apple store in the centre of Sydney people had been queueing since last weekend. We have the same fanboi idiots here that they have in the US.

Joke icon because it is the iPhone5 the biggest joke played on the fanbois yet.

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Joke

Re: Yawn...

And here I thought they weren't queuing up for several days because the people of oz have such short attention spans. Then again, the iPhone is pretty shiny.

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Headmaster

Re: Yawn...

"there are less obsessive compulsives in Oz"

Should be, "there are fewer obsessive compulsives in Oz"

Pardon me, I have to go and shout at the pigeons in the park now.

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Devil

"But there is a chance media will interview you "

Well, I suppose everyone knowing you're an idiot will change your life, but perhaps not in the way you might have hoped.

(Note: this sentiment applies to anyone who queues for days for anything, not just to iPhone buyers.)

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Yawn...

"owning one isn't going to change your life."

But it will!!! My very soul needs validation from such things. Oh God please, someone define me, I am so vacuous without such affectations!

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Headmaster

Re: Yawn...

@Stanislaw

No, I think I am right to use 'less' in this instance, less is used when referring to something that can’t be counted or doesn’t have a plural, to quote Albert Einstein “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”, since the level of stupidity is infinite, and we are talking about the iDiots, it is uncountable and therefore 'less' is the correct comparative to use (or is it a superlative?)

I'd also like to offer you my most enthusiastic contrafibularities for the helping me to get learned gooder English like what it ought to be spoke and embiggening my vocabularly.

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FAIL

Re: Yawn...

"less is used when referring to something that can’t be counted or doesn’t have a plural"

"obsessive compulsives"

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Bronze badge

Re: Yawn...

Or is it that the compulsives are less obsessive?

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Pint

Re: Yawn...

@ Field Marshal Von Krakenfart

Your proposition concerning the infinitude and consequent indivisibility of human idiocy is an exquisitely handsome example of the genre, and I salute it thus!

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Coffee/keyboard

Re: Yawn...

Stanislaw, see icon

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Facepalm

iPhone owns Australia

Travelling on public transport one can clearly see that Apple owns Australia. Every douche and his dog owns an iPhone.

Having said that.... Aussie is always a few yearss behind the curve and I reckon this will change.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: iPhone owns Australia

And if you went but what I see flying business class you'd think Blackberry still had 60% of the market.

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Megaphone

God I hate that phoney corporate team crap.

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Anonymous Coward

"There's no I in team! Am I right..I mean, err...WE mean WE are right, yeah!"

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Thumb Up

Yep

We all work together, we're one big happy family here, we're a TEAM!

Until your job gets outsourced to some third world shithole for a tenth of your wage, then it's "there's the fucking door sunshine, security will escort you off the premises to make sure you don't fuck with the computers."

Absolutely, Johnny. That shit makes me sick too.

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Coat

There' s no I in team...

...but there is a ME

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Bronze badge

There's no I in TEAM

But there's a U in MUPPET

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Thumb Up

"There's no I in team!"

But there are two in idiot. :-D

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Bronze badge

"There's no 'I' in TEAM"

There is also no 'F' in WAY.

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Linux

Re: Yep

TEAM; Technically Excellent Android Mobile

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Paris Hilton

'wants a phone that works'

Does Amy actually know what a phone does? What will she do after the Zombacalypse when the only phones that work have a rotary dial and a cord? I suppose the zombies will enjoy a light snack.

What, no zombie icon?

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Silver badge

Re: 'wants a phone that works'

If you want a phone that works, your choice has always been cheap dumbphone, such as a Nokia with a goddamn monochrome screen and lasts for weeks.

I would definitely not say you need to spend hundreds on an iPhone 5 to achieve working calls, or are people really that stup... don't answer that, of course, she was waiting in a long line to buy a phone.

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Stop

Re: 'wants a phone that works'

"If you want a phone that works, your choice has always been cheap dumbphone, such as a Nokia with a goddamn monochrome screen and lasts for weeks."

Don't be so literal.

A 'phone that works' means 'A phone that I can easily use the full functionality of'. That is what Apple do: They make phones that any feul can use. That is why they sell to masses of people who otherwise are often very non-technical: They are simple to operate and require no faffing.

It's not my cup of tea, but that's a major contributing factor to their popularity. It's like the difference between stereo with a hundred buttons and twiddly bits and one with an 'on' and a volume button. Some people don't want to fiddle: They want a simple experience.

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Thumb Up

Re: 'wants a phone that works'

Battery in BlackBerry Bold 9790 lasts for a week, if one is using it only for few calls and not much else. Same battery as 9900 but slower (i.e. frugal) CPU. It's also briliant at texting (thanks to proper keyboard) and the reception is good, as are other traditional phone qualities like switching calls, contact book or phone log. So I would say, (some) BlackBerries work great as a phone.

Of course some will grumble about poor choice of apps in RIM store or imminent death of the platform, but it is not app store, or platform, which makes great phone (unless you own an iPhone).

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Re: 'wants a phone that works'

iphones are not my cup of tea either but i recommended one for my dad because again, it just works. He doesnt want to do things outside the box but he does understand the internet, email and taking photos and videos. It is easy for him to use his phone and mac and can do everything he wants on them both.

I personally dont like the extra expense or walled garden approach but I can appreciate her sentiment.

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Re: 'wants a phone that works'

I hear this a lot, but I find that Android on ICS and above is very easy to use, as does my not-really-technical-i-just want-to-send-a-text-and-check-facebook girlfriend.This was maybe not the case a few years ago but I think times have changed.

I'm sure I read a study once which compared how a 'virgin' user would perform tasks on iOS and Android, and I think it was really close. They measured things like hunting around to find the correct button etc.

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FAIL

Re: 'wants a phone that works'

I find the amount of comments for these articles from people who want to defend apple whilst distancing themselves from their products to be most amusing, keep them up.

Infact I may even write my own.

"Yes but you have to remember this is what Apple do well, they make functionality easily accessible to the masses, whilst not my sort of thing and i would never own one i can understand the appeal."

Priceless.

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Unhappy

Re: 'wants a phone that works'

oh so thats how the undead track the living so effectively, use of a radio network. or is it because the living tend to be noisy and loud.

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Happy shiny people all around

" ...it is pleasingly light, so much so that an Apple Store staffer joked it may be disconcertingly so."

He was then taken into a back room by two black shirted staff, for re-education and attitude adjustment.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Happy shiny people all around

" ...it is pleasingly light, so much so that an Apple Store staffer joked it may be disconcertingly so."

Think I may be an exception to the norm but I don't like ultrathin/ultralight mobiles so I'd probably agree with this Apple store bod.

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Anonymous Coward

All Froth

Well done to the coffee shop, I trust they sold the right coffee, all froth and no substance.

Now what would that match?

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I am getting sick and tired of these 'news' stories regarding Apple and their products.

When Apple create a product that cures cancer, then write about it.

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too soon

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"When Apple create a product that cures cancer, then write about it."

The Chuck Norris Phone has an app for that.

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Nowt

so daft as folk

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Re: Nowt

My grandfather made it plural ... "Nowt daft as folks".

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Nowt

Folk is a plural, surely?

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Re: Nowt

Of course "folk" is plural. I was just reporting Granpa's variation on the theme :-)

See: http://forums.theregister.co.uk/forum/containing/539779

(Pardon the "ou" muscle memory in "Yourkshire. Ta)

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Anonymous Coward

Scary

Just listened to the BBC World Service 'reporting' from the queue at the Regent street shop. Some seriously fucking scary people there including one who flew from Sweden to London to buy his iHit, apparently to show his thanks to Apple for blah, blah blah. Scary, scary shit. Like the Borg after a collective Masters at a version of the Royal College of Art where they only admitted people under six years old and closed down the Union bar.

I've owned a dozen Macs, even have an iPad, but if I ever end up like that, someone please shoot me.

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Devil

Priorities

So many students preferring to spend their hard earned (???) on tech, not ale. What have we spawned....

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