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back to article So, just what is the ultimate bacon sarnie?

It's fair to say that the question of just what makes the ultimate bacon sandwich has proved somewhat controversial with hungry Reg Readers. Our Bauernfrühstück v bacon sarnie post-pub nosh deathmatch prompted a furious scrap over the comparative merits of back versus streaky, brown sauce versus ketchup and butter versus, well, …

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Stop

The only way to create a great bacon butty is... To do what you like. You'll never get anywhere near agreement on anything as important as a bacon butty.

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I disagree

True believers have been granted the vision and skills to make the perfect bacon sandwich. Heretics that use things like tomato ketchup or cheap and crappy white bread shall fry in the Devil's pan for all eternity. And they won't even get any brown sauce.

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@A Non e-mouse

Not unlike the best bacon, which always comes from a local farmer who sells it as his own shop.

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Devil

Re: I disagree

"...shall fry in the Devil's pan for all eternity."

Together with the microwave users.

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Coffee/keyboard

Re: @A Non e-mouse

"Not unlike the best bacon, which always comes from a local farmer..."

Thank's Tom for that more than somewhat disturbing image.

Long pig anyone?

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Flame

Re: I disagree

I disagree with your disagreement. A bacon sandwich in anything other than crappy white bread just tastes wrong! And forget the ketchup and brown sauce, mustard all the way!

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Re: @A Non e-mouse

Ah, the *special stuff*...

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Unhappy

Re: I disagree

Interesting I would so love to agree with your "And forget the ketchup and brown sauce, mustard all the way!" position, however a bacon sandwich should, and in my opinion, only be in white bread - but "good" white bread, (i.e. FRESH and not middle aged purveyors, "can't be bothered to go and shop properly so we use our freezer to store the stuff - for no real reason than our taste buds have decade to such an extent that a Tesco's ready meal is spicy", type white bread).

PS speaking as a middle aged person, I despair at what these people have come too :-(

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Re: I disagree... mustard on bacon... are you ill...

Oh yes, you must be... 'crappy white bread is a must'....

as one of the other posts says 'won't get agreement'

certainly not, crappy white bread is just too disgusting even to feed to the ducks....

give me a large number of well FRIED and crispy rashers in a decent roll (preferably with sunflower seeds on - perverse I know but thats my taste) with some butter, cream cheese (yes yes yes, mustard is bad cream cheese is just perverted), mushrooms and an egg (bacon without an egg is like a cart without a horse - nice but not useful)

When I get home I will make one and photo it for your pervy delight :)

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Re: I disagree

It's supposed to be a hangover cure. Ergo trying to per cure FRESH bread of any sort is out of the question under any circumstances.

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IT Angle

Re: I disagree... mustard on bacon... are you ill...

"give me a large number of well FRIED and crispy rashers in a decent roll (preferably with sunflower seeds on - perverse I know but thats my taste) with some butter, cream cheese (yes yes yes, mustard is bad cream cheese is just perverted), mushrooms and an egg (bacon without an egg is like a cart without a horse - nice but not useful)"

This is why sicko's gain a totally understandable heroic populist status. Nothing to do with how wrong their ideas are, but more with how they show people, as a whole, to be so mediocre. Good on ya - but you are totally wrong so don't go printing off a big gold star.

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Happy

Re: I disagree

It's supposed to be a hangover cure. Ergo trying to per cure FRESH bread of any sort is out of the question under any circumstances.

------

That would be procure, as in, take great care to obtain. From the latin (etymonline.com) pro- ob behalf of, cure- curare, care for.

lesson ends.

Nice fresh brown bread, butter, ketchup, good thick smoked back bacon cooked till the edge is nice and crispy. Optionally add a goose egg for taste (yellowest damn yolk I've ever seen from a northumbrian goose). Needs to be a big sarnie to accommodate the egg, but oh so good.

We need a bacon sarnie icon.

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Re: I disagree

It depends on how extravagant you want to get.

Once in a while I like a BLT on thick sliced seeded batch loaf, but I add some slices of stilton as well and top off the lot with HP or Reggae Reggae sauce.

But I'm just as happy with 3 slices of bacon on Tesco Value white bread with a bit of Ketchup.

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Meh

.....almost anything with Marmite.

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Pint

Marmite??... you're lucky I can only down-vote once! :P

There's only one acceptable use for malt and yeast (see left)

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JDX
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Milkshake and bread spring to mind too.

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Pint

@DJACK

So, we're not Marmite people then?

The good thing about Marmite is that it is a by-product of the brewing process, not a diversion from!

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Coat

Id agree with the Marmite - Proper Bread, lashings of Bacon, a dash of real butter on one slice, a spread of marmite on the other. However, if your bacon is too salty it can be ruined (don't buy the cheap stuff). Ketchup can be used to reduce the marmitey flavour for those fools out of touch with their tastebuds.

Flameproof coat - on.

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Ketchup is not allowed under any circumstances.

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I hate marmite but love marmite flavoured Crisps. I must try this.

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Trollface

So it is true then...

with 12 up votes and 12 down votes at time of posting, it appears you either love it or hate it.

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Windows

Almost anything with Marmite...

Judging by the equal upvotes and downvotes (12-12 at the time of writing) it seems you really love it or hate it - 50/50!!!!

(Personally, if Marmite's not spread on my "soldiers" before I dip 'em in my 3½ - minute soft-boiled runny eggs, there's something seriously missing in the morning as I set off, once again, to the (un)employment office.I can get a bit tetchy..Of course, anyone on the other side of the pond wouldn't know this culinary breakfast luxury.)

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Coat

Foiled again!

Sorry. I ate it too quick for a photo.

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Trollface

You don't fry bacon, you grill it...

...after trimming the fat off with scissors then preferably over a grill pan so all the fat can run off the bacon

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Trollface

Re: You don't fry bacon, you grill it...

Exactly. It's then best eaten in a brioche bun with mayonnaise and some chopped chives.

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Boffin

Re: You don't fry bacon, you grill it...

Not around here you don't. The smoked streaky bacon is fried in a non-stick pan without additional fat or oil, then when the bacon is cooked, you very lightly fry one side of both slices of bread in the same pan until the bacon fat is absorbed. The sarnie is assembled by turning the fried sides to the middle. No other condiments are required.

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Re: You don't fry bacon, you grill it...

Re:FartingHippo

"Exactly. It's then best eaten in a brioche bun with mayonnaise and some chopped chives."

must be Belgium to come up with a mad variation of a British classic.

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WTF?

Re: You don't fry bacon, you grill it...

What!?! The fat's where the best bit of the flavour is! Fry it quickly and when you're done cooking the bacon you can fry off some thick mushroom slices in what's left.

Hungry now...

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Pint

Re: You don't fry bacon, you grill it...

"It's then best eaten in a brioche bun with mayonnaise and some chopped chives."

You can fuck right off with your foreign heresies!

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fartinghippo

Mayonnaise on bacon? I do hope he is a genuinely forgiving god.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: You don't fry bacon, you grill it...

Kool-Aid drinker has it right, though I prefer a good white roll (or four), halved and fried on the inside. Not that it really matters as long as it's fried.

If you don't have enough bacon fat to fry all the bread, I can recommend white rolls fried in olive oil or granary rolls fried in butter (this is fantastic but I thought I was going to have a heart attack).

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Mushroom

you bastards

Trapped in India for two and half months, and now you've made me homesick. I would kill for a bacon sarnie, literally. Or even a big mac right now, somehow they managed to franchise mcdonalds here with out any pork/beef based products (not they are probably pork/beef based in the UK either).

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Flame

Re: you bastards

How can you mention McVomit's in the same post as bacon sandwches?!? Please wash ot your mouth with soap and then go stand in the corner and think about what you've done.

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Re: you bastards

The true travesty is the Bacon McMuffin.

After a heavy team night out (they used to happen about twice a month), a colleague of mine used to bring in a big bag of them to work next morning and hand them out. I'll swear that most of the people must still have been drunk in order to eat them! Made worse by the Berocca that they also thought made them feel better.

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jai
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simple is always best with a bacon sarnie, i feel.

plain white sliced bread, butter, nuke the bacon in the microwave to ensure it's crispy but not burnt, lots of ketchup

but, this got me thinking - surely somewhere in Scotland there's a chippie that'll do a deep fried bacon sarnie, no? now that would be perfect :)

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Flame

White bread? Nuked bacon? Ketchup? Blasphemy! Burn the heretic I say! Burn him!

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You can all stop the debate

'cos when you see the bacon sarnie that I intend to enter*, you'll then know the ultimate.

*enter as in enter the competition with, obviously. I've no intention whatsoever of "entering" a bacon sarnie.

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Coffee/keyboard

"entering" a bacon sarnie!

Go on - maybe just a little tongue wiggling?

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Location, location, location

There is a wagon located at BBC Television Centre (FSM rest its soul), behind the scenery block, which opens for breakfast until about 11s'es. They do one of the finest bacon and egg rolls on the whole FSM planet.

Being that I don't work there anymore there is also the Boston Cafe on Boston Manor Road, they probably should be shut down by environmental health, or NATO, but they do a mean bacon roll.

Personally I am a roll man more than a sarnie man, sarnies are more prone to flop around the place. Although you could tempt me with some thick sliced crusty white. Oh, and brown more than red, fried egg is a bonus.

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Re: Location, location, location

There's a van, located here:

https://maps.google.co.uk/maps?hl=en&ll=52.538175,-0.306027&spn=0.001343,0.004128&sll=52.538285,-0.30605&sspn=0.001349,0.004128&t=m&z=19&layer=c&cbll=52.538285,-0.30605&panoid=-LFKmwtfd5i9OLAwxgToIg&cbp=12,267.67,,0,5.79

That makes the finest Bacon & egg rolls in the universe. No sauce, just salt & pepper on a buttered torpedo roll. Devine. We place a bulk order for almost the entire office on a Friday morning & get them wrapped in foil, in a paper bag with our names on the outside, as there are perverts in the office who insist on sauce & you wouldn't want any cross contamination :-)

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Pint

Re: Location, location, location

Oh my dear god.... Is that van still there? I last ate there over 10 years ago.

It was the highlight of my week as a junior geek in the basement of TV Centre supporting the ungodly pile of cr*p that was P4A to go there and have one of their mighty works of gustatory pleasure. The Bacon and Egg Roll was a joy but you haven't lived (and died) until you had one of their fully loaded burgers with bacon, egg, cheese, mushrooms, onions etc. etc. etc.

As I remember it all the guys that did the real work in the studios used to eat there, the carpenters, technicians, cameramen and so on. Always amusing to rock up in my shiny geek suit and shoes among the guys in jeans and t-shirts.

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Anonymous Coward

M&S

I've discovered the most delicious ones, and you have to do no cooking yourself, are large quantities of those M&S packets of cooked smoked crispy bacon strips between white bread slices. With Brittany butter, spread thickly. Full of salt and nitrates, Yummy. You do have to take the strips out of the packet first before adding them to the bread and butter.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: M&S

Don't like my idea huh? I'll bet you're all just lonely old operators, shift people used to eating by the cold fluorescent rest room lights in the middle of the night.

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Re: M&S

Why is Brittany/Normandy butter so scrumptious? ...and their cheeses aren't bad, either, thought the ultimate hard cheeses are Ludlovian or Montgomery.

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A prize for the best should be called:

The Sir Samuel Vimes, Commander of the City Watch, Duke of Ankh's Annual Bacon Sarnie Award

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Re: A prize for the best should be called:

Bit of a mouthful I will admit, but then so is a good bacon sarnie!

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Paris Hilton

Re: A prize for the best should be called:

"Bit of a mouthful I will admit, but then so is a good bacon sarnie!"

That's what she said.

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