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back to article REVEALED: Everything Everywhere new 4G logo ... a SNAIL?

Everything Everywhere has chosen a surprising design to accompany the launch of its 4G next-gen mobile broadband in Britain, we've discovered. Ten trademarks were registered with the Intellectual Property Office on 29 May, and have now emerged: the ten include the phrases "4G Every", "4G Everywhere", "4G Everything Everywhere" …

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Everything Everywhere

Like your home broadband, but slower.

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Re: Everything Everywhere

Is it a dead snail?

Is it a coiled poo?

Yes! It's Everything Everywhere.

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Anonymous Coward

nuff said

slimy,

inderderminate sexuality,

slow,

armoured against complaints,

big brother eyes on stalks,

does not like salt...

** wonders what form digital salt can come in to test it ***

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Happy

Re: nuff said

Do they salt the stored hashes of user passwords? Anonymous will probably test that....oh, it's you.

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FAIL

Ooooh

I wondered what happened to the design team behind the truly inspirational "Lisa" Olympic Logo. Another masterstroke here guys!

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Ooooh

What about the OGC logo?

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/1901656/OGC-unveils-new-logo-to-red-faces.html

(although perhaps it was just a way for the graphic designers involved to imply that they thought their customers were a bunch of wankers?)

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Coffee/keyboard

Re: Ooooh

New keyboard please!

In fact, good job I'd just been or I would be invoicing you for a new chair too.

Someone somewhere won a bet with that logo, no doubt.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Ooooh

maybe the e logo is the product of.. err.. the OGC logo.. or maybe the London2012/LisaSimpson logo.

looks kinda like a confused.. err.. tadpole

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not just a snail...

It's a dead empty upturned shell..

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Anonymous Coward

Does this mean we will have to buy a new phone again?

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How fast is our 4G network?

Just look at that S car go.

What!? I like Trading Places :)

Joke doesn't really work though does it? But then, neither does the logo.

Beef jerky time.

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A dead snail at that!

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Anonymous Coward

Snails are related to the fastest animal.

The worlds fastest animal has never been seen doing anywhere near it's maximum speed. Therefore it's generally assumed to be one of the slowest.

But unless it was a particularly fast animal, why else would the slug be such an aerodynamic shape?

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Nya
Joke

It's not even a snail...it's a dead snail, it's fallen off the leaf, it's no longer of this world, it's an ex-snail...

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I found a very informative article

On the 4G revolution here:

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/science-technology/speculation-continues-over-what-the-fourth-g-is-2012082238767

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FAIL

Also the snail's on its back - ready to be noshed by the first passing thrush or Frenchman.

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WTF?

Accurate at least

Well I'll give them marks for honesty - I mean Orange's service DOES run at a snails pace normally.

Apart from that WTF, FAIL and er WTF

I wouldn't mind but you know some crazy design/marketing company will have made a ridiculous amount of money from this utterly stupid concept. Assuming it's real.

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FAIL

I don't normally concern myself with worrying about other people's logos...

...but that's just a bit crap.

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Coat

Snails can go really fast.

Saw one the other day in a sports car with the number-plate simply 'S'.

As it raced by, I turned to my friend and commented "Wow did you see that S-car go?"

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Re: Snails can go really fast.

There is actually a van called the S-Cargo which immitates the Citroën 2CV van. It was made by Nissan.

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Re: S-Cargo

Lovely little things. Never understood why they stopped making them. Should have licensed things properly with Renault and made a passenger version as well.

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Thumb Up

Re: Snails can go really fast.

Even more clever when you remember that one of the nicknames for the 2CV is the Tin Snail and that the S-Cargo was never intended as an export model (those you see are grey market jobs).

Yup, it's a deliberate bilingual pun, a damned good one and neither of the languages involved are those of its market....

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Ex snail

Not only that but it seems to have gone belly up. For a gastropod, that's disastrous.

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FAIL

Snail?

Looks like a whirlpool to me, and probably represents the one they have sucking up the 3G signal at Kings Cross.

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Re: Snail?

Indeed. My first thought was, "Snail? Nah, obviously they're admitting that their service is circling the drain!"

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WTF?

Maybe...

They've been watching Neverending Story and it's a racing snail.... those little gits were fast!

Posted via Falcor, because everyone needs a luck dragon that looks like a dog...

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TRT
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Re: Maybe...

I had a racing snail once. I thought I'd speed it up by reducing the weight so I took the shell off, but instead it just turned really sluggish.

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FAIL

Sega's lawyers are getting ready to take them to court, as the snail looks like their (tm) Dreamcast logo...

http://thegamershub.net/wp-content/uploads/Dreamcast-Logo.jpg

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Anonymous Coward

Prior "art"

Erm ... i think they may find that logo has already been taken: http://debian.org/

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Trollface

1997 called. Apparently IBM want their logo back. http://www-03.ibm.com/ibm/history/history/year_1997.html

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Anonymous Coward

Dead snail

Actually, that shell looks upside down, so isn't it more like a dead snail!

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It's not a snail

It's the vortex generated by your money disappearing into their coffers...

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Anonymous Coward

Chrome snail with go-faster stripes

For the necessary slick & shiny. Just add lightning grease, and it'll be over everything, everywhere. Yep, ticks all the whalesong boxes, so it's appropriate. Whether this sticky state is something you'd actually want is something else again, of course. Maybe they'll start a sideline in cleaning products?

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FAIL

EE

With such a ham-fisted, long-winded, cack-handed, drawn-out brand name like "Everything Everywhere" what do you expect?

As foar as I'm concerned EE stands for one company only: English Electric.

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Re: EE

Surely that was EEV (English Electric Valve Company)?

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Anonymous Coward

Remember

"4Got it already!"

As a handy sign up catch phrase, or not.

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Stop

It is an empty shell.

And like the empty shell, when you hold your 4g phone to your ear you hear white noise.

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Could be an ammonite

And they are extinct. Not just six foot under and pushing up the daisies, but many, many strata below.

Makes as much sense as the other explanations

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openSuse Chameleon

it looks like they cut of the tail and threw away the body.

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NJ
Facepalm

New EE name - anagrams

Could only come up with a couple

Real Minge Boot

One Tomb Lager

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Whale song and jossticks...

Are what were clearly missing.

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At least

It has rounded corners.

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Re: At least

Apple won't like that.

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Go

Why not ...

... after all, one of the best British sportcars of the 1960's had a tortoise for a bonnet badge ...

Quotes from the GORDON KEEBLE OPERATING, MAINTENANCE AND SERVICE HANDBOOK 1964 -

"WARMING UP THE ENGINE

DON’T start up a cold engine and then leave it idling while you rush indoors to pay a belated farewell to your wife.

In the interest of minimum engine wear, skip the farewell and drive away. When facing the music on your return in the evening, make a mental note henceforth to adopt a definite sequence of events prior to your morning departure. You will achieve substantially diminished wear from your engine and deserve greater affection from your wife”.

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Isn't that a sarc mark?

Perhaps they're trying to admit something?

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It's not a snail

It's the flight path of the Oozlum bird.

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Like our service: No Direction

Our new service levels?

Where are we headed around and around and......

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Linux

It's

Everything Everywhere - Debian

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I gather they chose a snail logo in a sudden fit of marketing honesty because a tortoise came across as a little too resilient and determined.

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