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back to article BOYLE and BONG: The secret story of my OLYMPIC TRIUMPH

"People like me sound like a lot of big cannons" - Mao Tse-Tung When Danny Boyle rang me out of the blue wanting to devise the greatest ever Opening Olympic Ceremony, I was in tears of joy. The chance to work with the man who wrote Trainspotting and brought Bend It Like Beckham to the world's cinema screens was unmissable. " …

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FAIL

Irvine Welsh...

.... wrote Trainspotting.

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Re: Irvine Welsh...

That's so old tec. Dead trees and all that malarkey. What you need is some high-powered multimedia mashup with a community investment package from the BFF and/or Channel 4 if you are going to get any where in his new thrusting world.

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Re: Irvine Welsh...

and Gurinder Chadha directed Bend it like Beckham.

Next you'll be telling us that Bong didn't actually devise the Olympic opening ceremony!

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Re: Irvine Welsh...

I think you'll find that Welsh just wrote the novelisation of the Danny Boyle screenplay. It's a shame that Danny didn't get his sister Susan to sing during the opening ceremony, but it was nice of him to get those Antarctic Monkey chaps to play, since it demonstrated the original amateur spirit of the Olympics. As for that Tim Berners-Lee, I think it's only fair to mention he created the Interwebs while on an internship with former presidential loser Al Gore.

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Re: Irvine Welsh...

Nope, Irvine Welsh wrote it, Danny Boyle directed it and John Hodge wrote the screenplay.

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Re: Irvine Welsh...

"I think you'll find that Welsh just wrote the novelisation of the Danny Boyle screenplay"

Don't say things like that, people might think its true.

Good book though. Much less played for laughs. I enjoyed "Filth", about a copper slowly going mad. Better writer than a lot of people who haven't read any of his books think.

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Re: Irvine Welsh...

I'm currently reading the Trainspotting prequel - "Skag Boys". Good stuff so far. (Also by Irvine Welsh).

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Re: Irvine Welsh...

@Chris Wareham

i think you'll find you are talking out your Arse! LOL

Irving Welsh wrote is FIRST to much acclaim and then the film was made from it.

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Re: Irvine Welsh...

Nope, Irvine Welsh wrote it, Danny Boyle directed it and John Hodge wrote the screenplay.

Woooooosssh!

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Re: Irvine Welsh...

>Nope, Irvine Welsh wrote it, Danny Boyle directed it and John Hodge wrote the screenplay.

Well if you are embedded in the old pre-iPad linear-time straight-jacket.

With the new internet 3.0 multi-media-cloud-social paradigm then whoever blogged about it last invented it first.

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Anonymous Coward

@Chris Wareham Re: Irvine Welsh...

Maybe if you type slower people will have time to glance up and see what is going over their head?

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Re: Irvine Welsh...

i think you'll find you are talking out your Arse! LOL

I think you'll find that I'm typing with my fingers.

Irving Welsh wrote is FIRST to much acclaim and then the film was made from it.

Tsk, tsk. Irving Welsh wrote the "The World According to Garp". Irvine Welsh is the chap we're discussing here - frontman of popular beat combo My Chemical Romance, and sometime screenwriter.

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Trollface

Re: Irvine Welsh...

Not only that, but Mao never said "People like me sound like a lot of big cannons." That was actually Winston Churchill.

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Coat

Who?

""Do you even know where Timor Leste is?" "

I thought he was a rapper.

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Trollface

I was watching

that Nathan Barley on youTube earlier...

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Anonymous Coward

Genius - community investment catapults

I'd like one of those please :-)

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Re: Genius - community investment catapults

Remember that for the opening ceremony you also need "Un trebuchet investissement communautaire"

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Facepalm

ffs

how many bong strips will there be before people get it?

to some irony is a synonym for metallic

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Anonymous Coward

Re: ffs

It's not just that it's a Bong post, it's not just that the quote at the top screams, "attempt at satire coming up", it's not just that the jokes are unsubtle (not denigrating the humour, just saying that they're obviously jokes), it's that it's all too true!

How many people think Stanley Kubrick when Clockwork Orange or Space Odyssey are mentioned?

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Trollface

Re: ffs

see my original post

The lack of subtlety IS the point!

Just the kind of twat who thinks zuckerberg invented then net and kno not who Robert Kahn or Vint Cerf are.

of course its too true, that's what makes it so excruciatingly funny (just listen to anything 'fig lover' ever said - it's indistinguishable from bong. yet shes dead earnest and he's a jaded hack taking the piss - prolly dashed off over a few swifties down the trout and niblick in his lunch hour)

Clockwork Orange or Space Odyssey

pers'nly it's Malcolm McDowell and dai bowie, but i am a contrary old fart (that cant remember the names of songs very well) :-D

and to be fair kubrick (whos ego made the late steve jobs look like St Francis of Assisi) didnt credit Burgess in the movie - or even make the story told in the book, and one hell of a lot more people saw the movie than read the book....

(you'll be telling me Decker wasn't a replicant next... but that's a whole other can of worms)

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Thumb Up

sitting at the VERY Amstrad PCW on which he invented the internet

Brilliant!

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Anonymous Coward

Oh! Danny Boyle?

The pipes, the pipes are calling!

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