back to article RIM retracts denial on consumer devices: Pulls out, spins in circle

In an unprecedented retraction of a retraction, a RIM press officer has stated that their company is pulling out of the consumer market "once and for all." Acknowledging that they had denied this fact two days earlier, the RIMmer sighed and said that sometimes people in the press office just made crap up. It's time to tell the …

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April Fool jokes don't work on RIM, their schizophrenic management makes everything possible.

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Anonymous Coward

the real April Fool

Is being told that the Ice Cream Sandwich update would be here in the first quarter.

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You do the hokey kokey and..

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Happy

Ok nearly got me

check the date

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They finally noticed the Elephant in the room.

About time too.

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Thumb Up

ha!

Had me all the way up to 'cocks on twitter'.

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Re: ha!

Isn't even having a Twitter account basically admitting you're a right cock anyway?

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Last paragraph...

Genius.

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Windows

Alex (telegraph.co.uk)...

started to wish his coronary had been more serious. However, the calendar on his Blackberry, being kept charged dutifully by his temp. PA, gave the clue.

(Nice one, El Reg.)

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Ironically

Forgetting about kids and concentrating on the core strengths is just what they should do.

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Anonymous Coward

As a blackberry user, I must say I could back this plan. Even the iPhone lacks acceptable options in slavering Alsations - honestly, a reason I haven't yet switched - and with email commoditized, it's an area in which BlackBerry can differentiate itself again.

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Happy

Wrong day

You should have saved this one for any day other April 1st. People might think it's a joke.

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Re: Wrong day

Thing is, I'm so disinterested in Rim now, I don't care what the stories say, true, enemy action , or spoof.

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Daily Mash

I thought I was reading the Mash there for a moment. :o)

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No big deal

They're not going to be selling many phones, no matter if they're in the market or not. Might as well cut their costs on advertising etc.

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Devil

In other news...

RIM now considers filing a lawsuit against El Reg due to spreading classified information which might scare off potential customers which they so desperately need these days. As such rumor has it that RIM and El Reg are reaching a settlement for several thousands of dollars.

Source of being obviously the same source as the article itself ;-)

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Coat

What??

RIM doesn't want cocks on twitter? Capon now, wattle we do for lolz? I've really comb to dislike the way companies feel spurred to coop up their customers.

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Headmaster

Re: What??

Can someone translate this to English?

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Re: What??

@Irongut

cock - male bird specifically chicken (see rooster)

capon - a castrated rooster

wattle - a fleshy growth under the chin of a male chicken

comb - the fleshy appendage on a male chicken's head

spurred - the rearward toe of a chicken's foot is often called a spur

coop - a place where chickens are kept

HTH

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Coat

Re: What??

UNIX - Men who were surgically castrated as boys, often in order to preserve their voices for Church choir performances.

Wait, hang on a minute...

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Happy

Surely it's a better idea

Than the current Nokia off-the-burning-platform-into-the-fire model?

(And this is the best of the 01/04s

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BBM Kids

Ignoring the joke, there's a whole generation of kids here in the UK* that are seriously addicted to BBM, they will eventually leave school, get jobs and spend money, all RIM has to do is not get left too far behind and have something they'll want to buy.

Which is probably a tall order, but at least it's possible, unlike retaking the enterprise market, which is a lost cause at this point.

* Perhaps this is just a UK phenomenon, a chance effect of PAYG txting plans here? Is BBM popular with the kids elsewhere?

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FAIL

Re: BBM Kids

Nah, when teens in the UK first started getting mobiles, they all wanted a Nokia. That brand loyalty didn't stay with them when they started getting jobs.

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Pirate

Platinum

Blackberry consumer phones, are laughable....

http://1.2.3.11/bmi/www.theregister.co.uk/Design/graphics/icons/comment/pirate_32.png

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What day is it?

Ah ..... spring must have sprung ..... did I just hear the first cuckold of summer?

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