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back to article Flying Spaghetti Monster's works spotted in space

Astrophysicists have found that galaxies can produce tails of “filamentary structures” with a noodle-like appearance. In a paper titled “The Flying Spaghetti Monster: Impact of magnetic fields on ram pressure stripping in disk galaxies”, researchers M. Ruszkowski, M. Bruggen, D. Lee and M.S. Shin suggest that certain …

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FAIL

lets be honest

>point out the odd rationale used to support the teaching of evolution in US schools.

I should point out this ignorant rationale is only used a handful of the US states. These states all happen to not only be red states (mostly Republican) but also coincidentally are in the bottom 10 states in income and education level. In fact for some reason all 10 bottom states in average income are red states.

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FAIL

Re: lets be honest

And yes I know the worst state for all this is Kansas which rates in the middle income wise but this is the state that is home of the Westboro Baptist Church. Sadly in many red states today another Scopes monkey trial would result in the defendant being lynched by the bible thumpers.

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Re: lets be honest

Missed Kitzmiller vs Dover, then? That was just funny. "No, I've no idea where those textbooks I personally raised the money for and ordered came from. What do you mean, lying under oath?"

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FAIL

Re: lets be honest

Well we have seen with the Penn St fiasco that Pennsylvania seems to operate more like a Boss Hog southern state than NE liberal state. Plus you always have Philly full of thugs (chavs) who would even throw batteries at Santa Claus at half of an Eagles game.

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Happy

Praise...

... His Intergalactic Noodly Appendages!

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Pint

You know something?

I actually hope the Flying Spaghetti Monster is real. I want to see it flying towards Earth as scientists and priests sit there weeping into their textbooks and prayer books. As the colossal meatballs roll across continents and oceans turn into tomato sauce, I will laugh hysterically, comforted by the fact that everything the human race knew and believed was utterly ridiculous and pointless.

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Boffin

Re: You know something?

Cheese String Theory?

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Anonymous Coward

re: Flying Spaghetti Monster's works spotted in space

Unbeliever - now I KILL YOU !!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1uwOL4rB-go

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Anonymous Coward

Proof is in the skies

Christian god visible in sky? Nope.

Flying spaghetti monster visible in sky? Yep!

Just sayin'.

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Go

Re: Proof is in the skies

Except... There is that nebula out there shaped like a gigantic middle finger pointing at us.

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Thumb Up

Re: Proof is in the skies

Ramen to that, brother!

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Re: Proof is in the skies

@LaeMing: That's just another of his noodley appendages. It may look like a middle finger, but if you look closer it's 2 meatballs and a noodle...

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Proof is in the skies

Finite being <> God.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Finite being <> God.

It's not actually Him. It's His signature on the universe. His Noodliness is permitted to sign His Work, yes?

By the way, to qualify for tax exemption on your meeting halls, is there a requirement that a religion "takes itself seriously" or just that it holds services and has regular members?

Anon because I really should be working, rather engaging in such deep philosophical discussions, but lots of semi-random capital letters are just too much fun.

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WTF?

And a major supporter of ID is running for republican presidential nomination

See PBS "Judgement Day Intelligent Design on Trial" (frontline)... where a small Pennsylvania town school board tried to have ID added to the biology curriculum! Heavily supported by Rick (google it) santorum. Note the santorum google thing probably NSFW...

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Anonymous Coward

I for one ...

welcome our noodly overlord. May his meatbally goodness drench us in sauce.

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May his meatbally goodness drench us in sauce.

NSFW?

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Trollface

But is the FSM evil or compassionate?

According to the old-menu he is a monster of great wrath, hatred, fire, flood and pestilence.

However, if you read the new-menu he is a monster that teaches love and forgiveness.

We are but his minions and we need to know.

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Mushroom

Re: But is the FSM evil or compassionate?

Perhaps Her hasn't noticed we exist. Which is probably the safest thing.

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Pity I did not hear this yesterday.

I was accosted by evangelical Christians yesterday evening and was asked what I believed in. I pointed to Venus, Jupiter, and Mars in the sky stating that my Goddess of Love, Father of Gods, and God of war were all now visible in the sky, so who was I to doubt. They were genuinely shocked.

On the other hand, if I started out about the FSM they would probably know immediately I was pulling their leg (which I was of course), so suggesting belief in ancient gods is probably the better ploy.

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Anonymous Coward

Note to self: find how to reliably identify Venus/Mars/Jupiter in sky (I have no talent in astronomy, but I'm sure I'll be able to work it out).

I actually like that approach, it's certainly less work than a friend of mine put in (not willingly, it was the place he grew up that sort of forced it upon him): he knows the bible more or less backwards, so his hobby is to always invite Jehovas Witnesses and proceed to confuse the crap out of them by countering every pre-cooked statement with actual bible quotes (he gets them to look it up as well, which is IMHO doubly evil). Needless to say, they tend to avoid his place now :-).

So, thanks. You saved me a lot of work :-)

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"so his hobby is to always invite Jehovas Witnesses and proceed to confuse the crap out of them by countering every pre-cooked statement with actual bible quotes"

I keep 'em on the doorstep.

Yesterday they lasted half an hour before the escaped.

I was in a good mood, the happier I am the longer they get to stay - until they realise they have been tied in knots. (It's not my book so they ought to know it better and not just a few choice extracts)

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Anonymous Coward

Yup, I keep 'em talking too - they're not used to anyone having a strong interest in science and being able to put up a good argument using solid evidence.

If they come round trying to convince me there's a god, they are fair game for being convinced that actually there isn't.

They don't come round any more - except just once when wanted to talk to someone Chinese they'd been told lived there. I'm not Chinese, so they were a bit surprised. Given up on Brits I guess, and trying to find someone more polite who won't just slam the door in their face.

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Note to self: find how to reliably identify Venus/Mars/Jupiter in sky (I have no talent in astronomy, but I'm sure I'll be able to work it out).

There's an app for that ;)

If you want to go the old fashioned route. When Venus is visible it is always found relatively close to the Sun so it is best seen around sunrise or sunset. It is by far the brightest natural object in the sky apart from the Sun and the Moon and appears bright white. With a telescope or a pair of binoculars you might even be able to see the phases of the planet.

Jupiter is fainter and never shows phases.

Right now you can see Venus and Jupiter quite close together around sunset in the Western sky - they are both very bright. Venus is closer to the horizon than Jupiter. Meanwhile on the other side of the sky you can see Mars - it's very bright and in a region with few bright stars and distinctly reddish orange - even in built up areas.

HTH.

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A bloke I know has worked out the perfect technique for dealing with Jehovah's Witnesses:

"Ah, good to see you, come in. I haven't really had a chance for a decent chat since I was Disfellowshipped.........where are you going?..........the gate opens, there's no need to jump it!........".

Apparently the merest mention of the magic "D" word causes 'em to do Warp 6 in any direction that can be described as "away"......

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Just to add to what Mike Richards said - all objects in the solar system lie in roughly the same plane (known as the ecliptic), so Mars, Jupiter, Venus and the Moon all lie on or around an arc across the sky. They are all easy to spot right now if you look towards where the sun has set and follow it round.

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Trollface

Alternatively...

... here's a quote I heard a few weeks ago:

"Jesus promised to rid the world of wicked people.

"Odin promised to rid the word of Ice Giants.

"I don't see any Ice Giants around, do you?"

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Coat

They're not noodles...

They're genticles! ;)

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Pirate

I for one

Welcome the first signs of the coming of our noodly (over)Lord.

May his coming bring forth the foretold beer volcanos.

As an aside - anyone else noted the rise in reported piracy and the decline in evidence for global warming?? IT IS A SIGN I TELL YOU!

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Re: I for one

They aren't real pirates, they are just mercenaries hired by the oil companies to discredit global warming models.

Wooden legs? Parrots? Eye patches? Not on the ones I've seen*.

*Disclaimer: number of pirates seen may not be statistically relevant

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Coat

I see a SIGN!

I see a sign! A sign, I tell you. Mind you, I *am* on the motorway.

The one with the googles, thanks.

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Happy

Pastafari!

All praise to the Sauce that comes from Jar!

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Windows

FSM?

Makes me glad to be a midget!

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Devil

Re: FSM?

Sauce from a jar?

Heathen.

All true believers know that the only way to show reverence to his noodly goodness is to gather and cook the ingredients yourself.

I drawn the line at making your own pasta - that's for monks.

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FSM

Blimey. One mention of "creationism" and we all rush to the forums desperate to be right.

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Re: FSM

But we are all right, every time.

It the god-botherers that don't understand.

Feynman had it right by saying he didn't know it all but wasn't scared either.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: FSM

Apart from this one guy who's desperate to be different.

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Alien

prove I'm wrong

The true creator of universe is the flying monster. We cannot see/feel him, but we must have faith in him. You either believe or you don't.

Now, I'll sue every school that doesn't teach the only true creationism.

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Likes beetles

I can't disprove that of course, just as I can't prove/disprove the existance of God. However, although there are reasons to believe in God, I can't see any reasons to believe He is preoccupied with pasta. Jesus was partial to fish, apparently, if that helps.

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Anonymous Coward

Jehovah's Witnesses etc.

Them, or Mormons, or whoever else goes door to door piddling religion: I like to tell them they're just in time for the orgy.

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Anonymous Coward

(no I didn't misspell "peddling")

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Pirate

Perfect timing!

ARRR! It's certainly fitting that a FSM story comes out on Friday, after all it's His Nodliness's favourite day of the week. Grab a tankard of ale and a wench and let youself be touched! (by His Noodly Appendage)

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Happy

Ah correct for today is indeed the frabbath. all praise the noodly one

ps i am according to the nhs a pastafarian. it was great fun explaining it to an increasingly bemused series of medical types on a recent hospital visit :-)

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Windows

PIRATTITUDE!!!

We need more before the next Solar Fart.

Now, me beauties, shut yer left eye and go "Avast!"

Else, the world will turn to a blob of tomato sauce - not ordinary tomato sauce, but the stuff the Great Unwashed buy from Lidl.

I'd rather goto hell.

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Meanwhile ...

... the crumbling of dogma that the paper exposes seems to have gone unnoticed. The sacred doctrine that gravity is the only significant force at galactic scales has been completely ignored.

"... combinations of gravity and magnetic fields can cause galaxies to leak long strands of gas."

Who knows, within a few years it may even be possible to question the existence of dark matter without unleashing a hail of opprobrium from the disciples of orthodoxy.

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