back to article Australia, US agree to space junk talks

Australia and America have decided that Europe’s moves against the half-a-million items of space junk might be a good thing. Australia’s participation was announced January 18 (Australian time) by foreign minister Kevin Rudd, while Space.com reports that Hilary Clinton issued a statement on January 17 (US time). America’s …

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So that's what ...

"Don't touch my junk" means.

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Isn't that a horrid phrase?

Americans clearly have issues with their sexuality if they feel they have to use a derogatory term to refer to their sexual organs. Religion is such venomous filth.

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Anonymous Coward

I'm confused

I'm far from a religious fanatic, but how does referring to your privates as "junk" infer a religious connection?

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Joke

Eureka!

What is needed is some kind of reusable orbital space plane with the ability to capture and retrieve used satellites for return to earth and repair and service defective or old satellites in-situ.

Brilliant!

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Good idea! Since it would be used to shuttle things between Earth and space we need a name that suits its function...... I know! it could be called a Space Shuttle!

oh wait......

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The free market solution would be to have a refundable deposit on satelites, then people could collect them for scrap

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Hopefully you'd get more than 20p back

Ginger bottles... IN SPACE.

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Re: reusable orbital space plane

Actually we don't. That would only deal with the bits large enough to justify a multi-million dolar flight, and *those* are not the dangerous ones because they are much the easiest to track. Also, since this stuff is a worry *because* it is dangerous, you'd have to be pretty nuts to propose using a manned craft to hoover it up.

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Joke

Ginger bottles in space.

Excellent film, nearly as good as "Debbie does the space station"

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Paris Hilton

But what does the verb "to bottle" mean? And do I want to watch Ginger doing it?

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Alien

Simple solution

Tell the junk to "look over there"!

Then just move the planet while it's not looking...

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"As we begin this work, the United States has made clear to our partners that we will not enter into a code of conduct that in any way constrains our national security-related activities in space or our ability to protect the United States and our allies,"

Because, as everybody knows, space is part of the USA.

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I thought it was more like "we won't sign anything that limits what we can do". But then at the same time saying that there are bad people who might do bad things.

The sticking point was that the only thing that there was unanimous agreement on was that maybe something is needed... (The USA wouldn't even agree with China that there shouldn't be weapons in space, but then according to USA regulations, a TV satellite is a weapon, so maybe that explains it)

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"As we begin this work, the United States has made clear to our partners that we will not enter into a code of conduct that in any way constrains our national security-related activities in space or our ability to protect the United States and our allies,"

They're a bit like a garage hoarder: "no, that's not space junk, you never know when it might come in useful for our national security, someday"

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I read it more like "we like this idea and know its a problem but still want to be allowed to blow your satellites up if we don't like you this week'

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Stop

Has the USA...

...paid the pollution fine to Oz for dropping Skylab on them yet?

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Yes.

"ALMOST 30 years after fining NASA for littering the local area with debris from abandoned space station Skylab, the Shire of Esperance has received a $US400 cheque.

American radio station Highway Radio paid the fine on NASA’s behalf, raising the funds on variety breakfast program Barker and Barley in the Morning. "

http://www.esperanceexpress.com.au/news/local/news/general/littering-fine-paid/1488319.aspx?storypage=1

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Coat

A different view of Hilary Clinton

sniff "That's a nice bit of metal that is. You never know when you're going to need some bolts either. That piece of insulation will make a nice piece of, well, insulation. Anyway I can't be talking to you all day. There's a pile of old newspapers that needs propping up so if you'll excuse me." Pulls cardigan around herself and shuffles off in slippers.

I know. Time to be gone.

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Ru
Meh

Oh dear.

Bag ladies are not traditionally capable of using the contents of their trolleys as strategic weapons.

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really?

You've never been in Atlanta at 4am, have you?

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Trollface

Australia's finest hard at work again.

Australia today promised to devote the services of its ENTIRE spacefleet to clearing space junk.

K.Rudd said: "Every single one of Australia's active spacecraft will be involved in the project, as well as our massive launch & recovery centers*."

"We'll be following America every step of the way" Kev continued, responding to a massive cue card held up by the US Ambassador, "Much in the same way a chained puppy follows a speeding ute. That it has been chained to." acknowledging the US Deputy Ambassador waving a sock puppet holding a Free Trade Agreement at him.

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Alert

@Wombling_Free

"K.Rudd said: "Every single one of Australia's active spacecraft will be involved in the project, as well as our massive launch & recovery centers*.""

What exactly is that *composed* of again?

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Mushroom

* massive launch & recovery centre

1,500,000 sqkm of slightly radioactive dirt.

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You didn't win the caption competition for Visit Australia did you?

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Happy

Thanks Mike

Am -very- please I wasn't drinking my tea at the same time as I read that!

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Holmes

Clean up space

What they need is a satellite with massive aerogel wings on it to mop up all those fragments of old satellites. Plus maybe a robot arm for gathering up the larger chunks.

After the junk collecting satellite has done it's job it would make for a useful collection of spare parts.

How much junk is there up there anyway?

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Facepalm

as expected

I don't know how we can ever have global progress, on all fronts, with the US's bullish and brattish attitudes. If you weren't such dicks, then you wouldn't have to be scared every time someone lifts a cheek to fart.

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Major Space power?

"The participation of the world’s major space power is probably more important than Australia’s endorsement"

So that's Russia then?

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true.

And, most of their space junk de-orbits on its own.

On the other hand they were first, and they sure as hell better remember that.

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Coat

not enter into a code of conduct that constrains antional security-related activities

Translation: "we only play by our own rules (although we don't feel necessarily bound by them)."

Whatever happened to peaceful use of space (aka earth orbit considering the time) yadda yadda...

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US is afraid of Iran

throwing lots of space junk up with a rocket. I wonder how many nuts and bolts a good Iranian payload could contain?

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