Cops cuff rectal shoplifter
Police in the Czech Republic have arrested a man who attempted to steal a digital music player by concealing it in his anus. The thief was caught when the shoplifting alarm rang loud and proud at the supermarket he had entered in the town of Prerov. Nabbed by staff, he was found to have a pair of earphones stashed in his slacks …
Nnnngh....too many jokes.....X_x
He's really in the shitter now.
He's given himself training for his time inside.
'Twas a really crap attempt at shoplifting....
With headlines like this
With headlines like this the death of paper newspapers will only be a matter of time.
Apart from covering the angle were this proves time-travel and is the origins of the often used term `bum rap`, I think were done here.
Well,
It was the right colour for a Zune when extracted ....
"Police hope he is not part of a organised crime ring."
Ya, no shit
erm, sorry
What Player?
This article doesn't state which player was secreted. Surely, this is important due to the eye watering difference between a first gen iPod and an iPod nano.
He should form a double act with that 'youtube sensation' woman caught on cctv taking a dump in a shop!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-JHLXMGB70
Well
having worked for a state corrections dept in my sordid past... I have stories....
Like you know how your mother told you never to put money in your mouth cuz you don't know where it's been? She was entirely correct - had an inmate atm in one incident... dry-celled him after visitation one day due to some suspicious behavior.. he eventually shit two twenties and a ten dollar bill...
Shampoo bottles, lighters, drugs, money... what folks will do doesn't amazed me anymore.... to my great disappointment . There are some things I'd rather be ignorant of, ya know?
8|
Presumably the con was examined by the prison doctor afterwards to make sure he was OK, and advised to get in touch if there was any change.
Buck o'five... in nickels
That_was_freaking_awesome!
Wife thought I was crazy just now lol
;)
Reminds me of the tyke who went to the doctors with a sore bum. The doctor extracted 99 twenty pound notes from the patient's backside. To which the patient explained that was probably why he wasn't feeling too grand.
Yes, I know, I'm getting it.
How could he do that?
How could he conceal the music player in his arse when his head was already up there?
"You can see where this is going, can't you?"
NOT looking. However, I've heard-tell it's pretty dark thereabouts...
Anyone who feels they need to do this
Deserves to keep the item in question.
Unacceptable prose!
Totally disgusting - can I get a refund?
Did they want it back?
...probably a lot easier these days than in the days of the old Victrolas...
This would never have happened if we'd stuck with personal cassette players.
He should've put the tube of lube up there too.
Then it would've been the perfect crime.
You can shove that iPod up your arse.
No! I didn't mean litera.... oh too late.
Time inside?
"The thief was later found to have a "colourful" criminal record and done time inside."
No, no. If he'd stolen a wristwatch he would have done time inside.
Ouch!
Thats got to hurt...
It does make me wonder though, how (un)stable would the battery have to be in one of these MP3 players for it to go into thermal runaway when heated up?
AC/DC
When the cops confronted the thief...
...did they order, "Blow it out your ass?"
This reminded me of the old one about the nurse who shoved a thermometer up between her legs and rectum.
Maybe it's a present...
...for his homeboy cellmate in prison?
This gives me an idea
For a new range of "Hands free" music players
