US author David Guterson has walked off with this year's Literary Review Bad Sex in Fiction Award, for an admirable contribution to the genre in his novel Ed King. The book is ominously described as "a re-imagining of the Oedipus myth", and the judges were particularly impressed with "the part where a mother has sex with her son …
As an audiologist
I can safely say that I have never had to put a set of headphones on a vagina. I have however, heard rumours of female colleagues experimenting with the vibrating bone conductor though....
As a hearing-impaired person
After many years of innocence, I shall now wonder where the bone conduction headset has been prior to it being placed upon my head by a smiling female audiologist....
Bit unfair to Murakami
That particular sex scene in 1Q84 was between a possessed dude and some sort of spirit half-person. It's not supposed to be normal sex!
I always liked the line "His eyes slid down the front of her dress". eewww.
Wouldn't that read better as "with too blunt a pin" ?
May I be the first....
.... to use a Paris icon
@May I be the first..
Now to slip into something a little more comfortable.
This, ladies and gentlemen, is why we pay so much for our Register subscriptions.
Keep up the good work chaps!
""an 'impossibly stiff, impossibly eloquent cock' that 'poked her now from the front and now from the back and now from the side',""
I am still laughing, thank you. :-)
Background music for scene
U2's "I still haven't found what I was looking for"
Is my (not so unique after all) talking penis a fail then? Or are you talking about a talkative bird? I am confused - maybe Playmobil would help?
Shower romp? Bar of soap...?
Sounds like good clean fun to me...
You can't make this shit up
- NASA boffin: RIDDLE of odd BULGE FOUND on MOON is SOLVED
- SOULLESS machine-intelligence ROBOT cars to hit Blighty in 2015
- BuzzGasm! Thirteen Astonishing True Facts You Never Knew About SCREWS
- Worstall on Wednesday YES, iPhones ARE getting slower with each new release of iOS
- Tor attack nodes RIPPED MASKS off users for 6 MONTHS