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back to article US nuclear aircraft carrier George Bush crippled by toilet outages

The US Navy's newest and mightiest nuclear aircraft carrier, the USS George H W Bush*, has been plagued by continual failures in its lavatories, according to reports. Sailors have been forced into increasingly desperate measures to relieve themselves. Nov 11, 2011: USS George H.W. Bush (CVN 77) transits the Arabian Gulf in …

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Coat

I see a plotline for NCIS coming up...

Labcoat for Abby

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TRT
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In other words...

the toilets suck.

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No problem is exactly the opposite.

What I don't get is the deliberate introduction of single points of failure on a fucking warship.

Banks of bogs serviced by centralised vacuum systems? That is a guaranteed disaster, no matter how massively over engineered.

Vacuum should always be generated as close to the point of need as possible.

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Coat

Look on the bright side, at least they don't blow.

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Coat

Indeed.

A really piss-poor piece of engineering; the engineers did a crap job and are probably not flushed with success right now.

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I think that the problem is paradoxically that the toilets don't suck.

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Trollface

Clearly they need a Dyson. No loss of suction, no matter how many tampax you flush.

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Unfortunately vacuum bogs have a bad habit...

...of doing exactly that if the piston returns before the bowl has completely cleared.

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IT Angle

I see...

So when it's working, the toilets suck. And when they don't suck, they're not working. A bit like Microsoft products then.

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Fire the DCA*

Maintenance of the CHT (collection, holding, and trasnfer - i.e. sewage) lines and system traditionally belong to the Damage Control Division, headed up by the Damage Control Assistant (DCA). The lines require more-or-less constant attention in rotation - start at one end of the hull and work to the other, then start all over. I've seen what happens when the process isn't followed correctly, and it's *NASTY.* It's the job of the DCA make sure his sailors know what they're doing, and actually do the job right, as well.

Fire his butt.

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WTF?

Fire the training officer as well...

When you read this line:

"Naval commanders blamed the problems on inappropriate objects such as clothes or feminine hygiene products being flushed down the heads."

FFS. If such an excuse is believable (and I'm dubious), then the seamen and seawomen should be told over and OVER again that flushing clothes and tampons is not the thing to do. It's bloody common sense, but since most people lack common sense, they need to be told - preferably by angry chief petty officers shouting in their face. Or maybe they should have sanitary bins next to the female toilets, like they do in civvie world.

Myself, I'm suspecting the episode is the fault of the US Military-Industrial complex. Some company's been given a no-bid contract to provide the toilets to the George Bush because the firm's CEO play golf with a couple of Senators, and there's no clause that prevents the company getting their money just because the loos aren't up to scratch.

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Anonymous Coward

Confirmed - You're not to be relied on.

"FFS. If such an excuse is believable (and I'm dubious),

then the seamen and seawomen should be told over and OVER again

that flushing clothes and tampons is not the thing to do."

Vessel deployment imminent.

Reluctant to depart swabbie, rinses & releases t-shirt.

Line blockage or macerator damage.

Deployment delayed.

Repeat as required.

Regular occurence in UK RN.

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Carrier design is a mature technology, so I strongly doubt some "no bid contract" deliberately made this mistake. The Nimitiz Class (including the Bush, named after the senior Bush, a carrier aviator in WWII) are built by Northrop Grumman, a regular contractor for multiple ships, and one of the few capable of building something of this magnitude.

Since the design is of a proven historical status, I concur with a prior poster that the Damage Control Officer is likely not managing his department and taskings properly.

Before ranting about a subject, a few minutes of google would at least give you a starting point to not being foolish.

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Happy

Lol

and clearly you were never in the U.S. Navy.

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FAIL

@Peter Murphy 00:02 GMT

Fire the Training Officer?

Ah, no.

"Not tossing inappropriate items down the shitter" is something that is taught young sailors LONG before they ever see anything that floats. Maintenance of that 'Basic' instruction does not belong to the Training Officer (technically, that's the XO, though the job is delgated far down teh chain and to many individuls) but rather to the various Chiefs and Leading Petty Officers whom are responsible for discipline and management of their sailors.

So, yeah, there's apparently a discipline problem on board, too. But mostly, I'd blame the Damage Control Division - If you do the job right, the lines stay reasonably clear no matter *what* goes down them, and if you do it wrong, even once, you can (literally) stuff up the whole system for days. Or even better, if it's an older vessel, you can cause a CHT line to rupture - under pressure.

I've seen the results that last item. Nasty beyond the power of words to relate.

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Coat

And now, for the inevitable joke:

Clearly, this George Bush is full of it, too.

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g e
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So. Like George Bush...

It's full of shit.

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Too much bran in the diet?

423 dunnies for 5,000 people? That about 1 for every 12 crew, or 2 hours per day each. Even if they are reserved for different genders and ranks (mustn't see the officers with their trousers down!) that's still a great deal of porcelain.

One can only assume that the designers needed that amount of redundancy in the system to cope for "emergencies" (aircraft-carrier landings can be scary events) and the reported breakdowns. I wonder if the weapons systems, for all their extra complexity, are any more reliable?

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Re: Too much bran in the diet?

1 for every 12 isn't much. Standard UK domestic guidelines are 1 for every 6 (i.e. 7 people = 2 toilets).

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"Standard UK domestic guidelines..."

Do not apply. It's a warship, not an office park or residential development.

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Anonymous Coward

Name sake

Like its name sake, full of crap an doesnt work too well

yes yes, i know its not named after the Dim one, but still....:)

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Windows

There you go, Al-Qeda. Doddle.

Plant a couple of dozen female mateots on board in 'off-games week', and their combined tampons in the heads can scupper a warship!

(Aptly named ship, in this case...)

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Coat

Whoever did the plumbing must have (not) been taking the piss.

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This post has been deleted by its author

Coat

Hey...

...shit happens.

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...or in this case it doesn't ;)

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Is that an ...

Ice-Cream van on the deck?

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Devil

Perhaps they're filming...

... another of the Hot Shots films ;-)

RIP Lloyd Bridges

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Windows

Hahaha!

That's all.

No, it's not.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Now, where's my empty bottle....

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Coat

So ..

.. another Bush being a pain in the a** .. if amusing

.. be war crimes next ..

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Happy

The headline would be better without "US nuclear aircraft carrier"

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Happy

Nah, I think it should say "US nuculer aircraft courier"

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Anonymous Coward

A ship full of s*** - just like its namesake :)

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Anonymous Coward

So, in short,...

...they're pissed off and well and truly in the shit, then?

AC because I don't want the USN dumping all over me for taking the piss ;-)

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Coat

No head?

Good thing it's not the USS Clinton...

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Coat

Or its sister ship, the USS Monica L.

That's also full of seamen.

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Anonymous Coward

Hmmm

This must be the first time that Bush (Senior) wasn't taking the piss.

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Facepalm

Montgomery Scott's maxim:

"The more they overtake the plumbing, the easier it is to stop-up the drain." (ST III; TSFS)

Rather literally, in this instance, it seems...

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Anonymous Coward

One again, it shows that George Bush wasn't good for shit !!!

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Anonymous Coward

A comment on the Bush family?

A ship full of sh....

This is in keeping with GW's style of Texas BS!

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Holmes

So George H.W. Bush has problems in the head?

Sorry, that's all I've got......

Another unintended, but fitting application of the Sherlock icon!! No shit indeed, my good man!

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Anonymous Coward

So what you are saying is

George Bush is backed up backed up with Shit and full of sea men.

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Bust Bogs Bollox Bloody Big Battleship

I can do subheadings, me.

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IN NELSONS TIME.....

they stuck their backsides over the poop deck and got on with it, there was no 3 ply toilet roll, they ate weevil infested biscuits, rotting salt beef, got scurvy, drank grog, climbed the rigging without a health and safety assessment, fought at every opportunity. They were real men.

Not like the namby-pamby lot of today who need their pepsi, aircon, risk assess having a shave and eat peaches and cream for afters.

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Pirate

RE: IN NELSONS TIME.....

Not just Nelsonsonian times! A grand relative served on one of the Insect class gunboats during WW2 in the Med, and told me they had two "heads" - effectively canvas-covered frames over a plank - hanging over the stern, and that for a crew of over fifty!

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Off

To the poop deck then...

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Pity the poor A-gangers that are having to deal with those outages...

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Anonymous Coward

"it can steam at a speedboat-like 30+ knots for 20 years without refuelling"

Imagine holding it in for that long: "When they've stopped chasing us and we can get the toilet technicians aboard, then you can go!"

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So, the third George Bush ...

... that isn't quite right in the head.

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Seems appropriate...

No Working Head, just as the carrier's name sake, and progeny.

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