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back to article Steve Jobs' last words: 'OH WOW. OH WOW. OH WOW.'

A eulogy for Steve Jobs written and delivered by his sister was published over the weekend. It reveals many personal details of the techbiz titan's life, among them his last words as he lay dying with his family around him. According to Mona Simpson, Jobs' sister and a professor of English at the University of California, his …

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Anonymous Coward

OH WOW

Worst news story ever.

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shit

How he hell is this tech news? What a pile of shit!

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Dying.....

So its probably a pain induced Owwww Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww rather than this. But I digress. SJ - RIP, will miss your showmanship on the yearly 'one last thing'.

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My thoughts too, either pure pain or his body flooding him with chemicals to counter the same.

Not any kind of visions of the afterlife or ghosts or any of that mythical nonsense.

Whatever we neither need this story nor comments.

Including this one.

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Happy

better one here...

I preferred the interview with the nun who had been beside Mother Teresa as she passed away.

The TV reporter, off-camera, asked her what the Holy Mother's last words had been..

The reply, quite meekly but as a simple matter-of-fact, was: "I can't breathe"

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"Not any kind of visions of the afterlife or ghosts or any of that mythical nonsense."

People seeing visions as they near death is pretty well documented and can't realistically be called nonsense. If you want to call them hallucinations I'll go with that, but to say people don't see things that look like God or angels or (more likely in Jobs' case) Nirvana is to ignore tons of documented research on the subject.

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Coat

He saw the Light

He saw the glow as he ascended to a Windows icon surrounded by light....

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Actually, when your brain is on the way out, you do get those sorts of visions.

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Cue Maxwell Smart.

"Hang on, Chief, I think he's trying to say something."

Max, kneeling, leans in close and places his ear next to the dying man's mouth and listens, then he stands.

"So, Max, what did he say?

-Get you knee off my chest."

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Saul... ehhh... Steve on the road to Damascus...

Oh Wow, Oh Woh Oh Wow

I've just realised why Android is so good

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Coat

Nope...

He probably said that.

Not pain induced. By the time he said that he would have been doped to the gills by hospice.

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I'm sure I won't be the first, but had he just seen iGod?

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That's so direspectful to him. Of course it had to be iBudda. Let's respect the man's iFaith if we're going to make iJokes.

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Facepalm

God strewth

The cult of Jobs now has the kernel of an afterlife myth. If only people buy Apple products and services, they too may follow Steve into a smooth, minimalist version of heaven. You aren't allowed out though and there's a strict dress code.

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Meh

This s getting complcated. I think Jobs' version of 'heaven' would mean 'hell' to me. And vv maybe. Not sure where I hope he went, don't wanna meet him.

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Anonymous Coward

I swear on my iPhone 4S...

I saw Steve Jobs showing a Hillsbus route 610X bus driver a more efficient way to change gears.

Steve has NOT left the building.

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jai
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evidently

heaven is running OS X 10.9 and the angels have ditched harps for iPads

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I'm thinking heaven to Jobs would look like THX1138 with earbuds.

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Could be worse...

She was probably carrying a Samsung.

As famous last words go, not too memorable, and up against:-

God damn you --- George V - not a particularly good final few words - maybe he realised the brompton cocktail was to get him into the first editions...

but infinitely better than...

They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist.... which were the highly inaccurate last words of General John Sedgwick a commander in the US civil war.

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Coat

I beg to differ...

As words to get you remembered, General John Sedgwick was spot-on.

Yep, the one with the musket and telescopic sight...

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Sedgwick...

Probably wasn't a telescopic sight, just a Kentucky long rifle...

Other (applicable) last quotes..

Leonardo da Vinci: "I have offended God and mankind because my work did not reach the quality it should have"

Pancho Villa: "Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something…"

Ludwig von Beethoven: "Friends applaud, the comedy is over."

Personally I'm going to copy Rick Wakemans epitaph: …”There’s been a mistake . I haven’t finished yet”.

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Coat

And lo, a shiny orb of of glowing glass and aluminium did envelop him, raising him up to his rightful place in the heavens.....

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Anonymous Coward

Perhaps he was being burnt by the overheating iPhone battery?

That's all I have

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Anonymous Coward

That's what happens when you're on palliative care drugs.

But not sure if it's something that deserves the El Reg treatment.

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Pallitive Drugs

So right. My very ill mother was pumped full of morphine for the last few months of her life to control pain, and whilst it could be entertaining listening to her having babysat the neighbours kids the night before, the induced hallucination was not very pleasant to behold in someone who was so dearly loved.

A joke is okay, but there are some areas which should be treated as completely out of bounds.

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jbk

Sorry about your mum, but you REALLY need to grow a thicker skin! Pretty much everything people say that isn't small talk is going to be capable of offending someone, somewhere. How often have you or someone you know said "oh, you nearly gave me a heart attack", when surprised... well curse you for treating heart attacks in such a light-hearted way! Chill some. Oh, and my Dad had Alzhemiers and I often hear the jokes about that and don't really mind; it's human nature and it's not meant personally, I know - so I do speak from some experience.

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Happy

Ah, yes

Some years ago, my Dad was suffering an aggressive form of prostate cancer and quite advanced Alzheimers (he always was an unlucky bugger). In his more lucid moments, he would often comment that he was glad he had Alzheimers, it made him forget he had cancer.

I can only hope I can face my end with such humour and equinamity as and when it comes.

GJC

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Its not a bad last message

Lets face it.. Infront of your family, children especially. Seeing dad screaming in pain wouldnt be a nice lasting memory.

So, if you do have the abilty/presence of mind to be able to give them a warming last memory, its not a bad one to go with.

He was often quoted as looking forward to his next journey, so it would fit the Man.

If it's true, and was planned, good for him.

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"He was often quoted as looking forward to his next journey, so it would fit the Man."

As long as he didn't need registration plates for his transportation vehicle and there were lots of disabled places for him to park in I expect he would be happy!

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Ugh

Reading this brought me chills...

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Anonymous Coward

If I was dying of Cancer

I'd want to be so full of drugs that I'd be as far out of it as a van full of hippies on owsleys old original too...

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Anonymous Coward

That's usually the way it goes.

I know two people who died as a result of their cancers, and witnessed their deaths... both were heavily sedated and quite unconscious for the last 24 hours or so. Neither were in a particularly coherent state for some time prior to that as a result of large doses of painkillers and sedatives.

I Am Not A Medic, but I doubt it was any different here. You too might go "Oh Wow" when dosed up with enough opiates to make the world go away.

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Anonymous Coward

Compasson

No matter how much you dislike the man, someone dying with his family present is most distressing. I hope his family have the strength to cope with this loss and don't get too upset about the various strong views being expressed.

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Bronze badge

Huh? It should depend on the CIRCUMSTANCES of how one is passing on.

What I may have missed and what doesn't seem to be here is his sister's account of whether or not he was *smiling* or lamenting or was he bowling over in pain. Nevermind the drugs.

The problem with humans is we "cling" too much. If we're more rationally earlier in life trained to EXPECT death, how EVER it comes, part of the excessive preoccupation with transformation of some sort is nixed. Now, if one is violently removed from our realm, and it was an most unfair, vicious means, then of course, getting emotional, defiant, and and full of denial is much more to be expected. Revenge and all sorts of other things can result.

But, for those who live long, reasonably good, materialistic, violence-free lives, and who have very little to want for, those kinds of people ought to be more rooted, and many probably are. Many of them *likely* (if thoughtful) prepared their familes and loved ones to be strong and not deny the inevitable fact of death. It is truly one's right to die with dignity and without uncouth activity, but one cannot demand AND get the right to be corporeally persistent.

Given Jobs' past, I'm pretty sure he very well prepared his family. I suspect there are some uncouth, profiteering journalists and rags out there seeking to monetize every last bit of the man's life. If it was not the drugs, then it probably IS the case that he was energetic enough to vocalize what he felt he was experiencing as a transition. So long as we're not truly evil or murderous, it's possible we'll get to feel or think we're feeling a new level of existence, probably for a better path, not a regressive or "back to square one" or, "onward, straight to a hell box".

We're too caught up in "death" because we're not permitted in general to die then come back to talk about it. Those who do claim the event are commercialized to the hilt and yet the world is not globablly transformed.

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WTF?

@dssf

"If we're more rationally earlier in life trained to EXPECT death, how EVER it comes, part of the excessive preoccupation with transformation of some sort is nixed."

Sorry to break it to you but that's utter bollocks.

I lost a child a few years ago (at a few months old), and my older children KNOW what death is because of that. Everything was explained to them at an appropriate level for their ages, and any questions over the years have been answered truthfully. At the time they weren't too bother, now they do worry more over death and dying than other children of comparable age (6-9). They worry more when people are ill that they will die.

I would never have withheld the information from them, but it does change their outlook on life......

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Bronze badge

I used to worry, too...

I've lost dearest friends, casual friends, and relatives, and shipmates. Some from my age of about 10, some older. Biology class, war movies, news, and living in rough neighborhoods with very little isolation from danger has a way of altering perception, outlook, expectations... Nowadays, even if I have a spell of pain, I still *hope* that they went to a place better than here. It needn't be some human-named place called "Heaven" or "heaven", it just hopefully is not some dead-end, meaningless, pointless, void of a place.

So, in my case even before my teen years, I knew what death was likely to be like. I too worried at times. Had some anxiety over it. It came and went off an on over the years. Sometimes, now, I actually WELCOME it. Nothing will last forever, and the longer we are cushioned by denial or those who withold it form us

As for the adults, having knowing that he delayed treatment, and went to the hospital at least 3 times, they had to have known for years that he was on the losing end. He probably made his inner peace. Do you think Jobs withheld it from his family and banned them from watching the news? The adults surely must be capable of coping with this, shouldn't they? Obviously (and, did I need to say it?) the kids are a special case. I am preeeety sure that any close relatives of any family standing to get the kind of money Jobs is leaving behinds will have a few frames of mind:

1. I feel sorry for you that you have to go so soon, at this youngish age, in this manner

2. I hope like hell your affairs are all in order and that I get some of that pie

3. I hope I can live long enough to enjoy it -- whether or not a make a + difference in the world

4. I hope like hell you don't perceive of me from afar as undeserving of your gifts -- GODS, thank you, man.

ANd who knows what else.

As for kids, I know that not all kids will process the loss of a parent, but many kids can be reslient, especially if they have several years of preparation. I am not certain, but I doubt Jobs and his wife and relatives would deprive the kids (I don't know their ages) of the evolutionary stages of passing on if they are at least past 6 years old. It'd be kind of cruel to just spring it on them by way of a sudden disappearance from the daily hugs and wrestling or TV watching and so on.

Now, if someone left *me* that kind of money, even $500,000 after taxes, I could create jobs and income streams and maybe open an incubator or two.

PS, I wasn't trying to demean or degrade individuals stages of grief. It's just that we as a species vest a lot in clingyness as if there is no chance to "meet up" later.

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Could've been bowowow.

Perhaps he was about to be reincarnated as a dog.

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JDX
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Deep stuff.

Unless it was "oh no" rather than "oh wow"

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Or it's upside-down

MOM HO! MOM HO! MOM HO!

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The Castle of Aaargh

"The Castle of Aaargh."

What is that?

He must have died while carving it.

-Come on!

-That's what it says.

Look, if he was dying,

he wouldn't bother to carve "Aaargh."

-He'd just say it.

-That's what's carved in the rock.

-Perhaps he was dictating it.

-Shut up!

-Does it say anything else?

-No!

But, for the complainers, i'm sure this was a Bootnotes story. No? Oh...

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TRT
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He's iShuffled off this mortal coil.

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Paris Hilton

I'd rather see the castle of Anthrax, really.

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TRT
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Your mother was a Napster and your father smelled of Blackberry?

"Sorry. We're right out of Bondi Blues. (pause) I've got an iPhone4s."

"Does it talk?"

"Yes."

"I'll have it."

And other assorted Monty Python references not intended to cause offence.

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Anonymous Coward

OH NO

Did you really need to publish this 'story'? Especially with the clientele the register attracts these days, it's only going to be unpleasant.

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Anonymous Coward

reg customers LIKE unpleasant

The post is required, and must contain letters.

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Anonymous Coward

Yes these articles are getting a bit rediculous.

Long past the point of beating a dead CEO!

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Dougal: Aww...he was fantastic, wasn't he?

Ted: Ah he was brilliant.

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