back to article Rogue kangaroo floors broom-wielding 94-year-old

A 94-year-old Queensland woman came off worst in an encounter with a rogue kangaroo which piled into her in the garden of her Queensland home. According the the Courier Mail, Phyllis Johnson was hanging out washing at her Charleville granny flat when the battling beast bowled her over and gave a her a few kicks. She recounted …

COMMENTS

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  1. Solomon Grundy

    Dog didn't work?

    Should have had curtains as well.

  2. jai

    proof?

    needs Playmobile recreation, or it didn't happen

  3. frank ly
    Thumb Up

    Good Luck To Her

    This old lady has over 40 years on me but she seems to be mentally and physically tougher than I am. I hope she recovers and gets well soon and can continue hanging out the washing for a long time to come.

  4. paulf
    Mushroom

    What's that Skippy?

    What's that Skippy?

    You've just kicked seven shades of shit out of Grandma?

    Quick Clarissa grab my 12-bore..

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Devil

    This looks suspiciously like rabies...

    Dunno about Australians, but in other countries such animals are shot on the spot and the brain is taken for an antibody test for rabies ASAP.

    1. Annwyn

      @AC

      My first reaction to this story was one of surprise that the trusty country QLD coppers didn't shoot it - so unlike them really.

      But, for the record, there's no Rabies threat in Oz - one of the many reasons the quarantine checks at Aussie airports are such a pain in the arse...

    2. Bryn Smith

      No rabies here...

      Rabies has never been detected in Australia, which is just one of the many reasons that our customs department is really anally retentive about importing animal matter.

      1. Andrew Moore

        No rabies...

        but only because Cane Toads aren't carriers...

      2. VeganVegan
        Alert

        @Annwyn, Bryn Smith

        No rabies, but there are cousins of rabies, called Australian bat lyssaviruses, found in both frugivorous and insectivorous bats.

    3. ravenviz Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: This looks suspciciously like rabies...

      Do they give the brain back again if given the all clear?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Mushroom

        @ravenviz

        "Do they give the brain back again if given the all clear?"

        Only if it belongs to a politician...because they know it won't be used for anything.

  6. Loyal Commenter Silver badge
    Trollface

    What to do with the captured 'roo?

    Chilli kangaroo burgers sound tasty

  7. sprouty76
    Happy

    That's not a big stick,

    *that's* a big stick

  8. King Edward I

    Australia...

    The only country where, without exeption, EVERY SINGLE PIECE OF LOCAL WILDLIFE IS TRYING TO MURDER YOU!,

    1. Colin Miller

      P'Terry

      Hands Edward I a book entitled, "Dangerous Mammals, Reptiles, Amphibians, Birds, Fish, Jellyfish, Insects, Spiders, Crustaceans, Grasses, Trees, Mosses and Lichens of Terror Incognita", Vol 39C, Part 3, and a list of the harmless creatures thereof, being a short note reading "Some of the Sheep".

    2. Annwyn

      Expat...

      "The only country where, without exeption, EVERY SINGLE PIECE OF LOCAL WILDLIFE IS TRYING TO MURDER YOU!"

      I really should start using this as my answer when asked "What on earth possessed you to move to the UK from Australia?"

    3. JaffaMan

      Ladies and gents of the jury, I present exhibit A) MF'ing HUGE SPIDER

      I never want to go to Australia because of the above reason. Man is not number 1 on the food chain there!!

      http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/earthnews/3353693/Giant-spider-eating-a-bird-caught-on-camera.html

  9. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Not a good idea!

    "I used to feed them next door, give them some bread" (from original source).

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Feeding them next door IS a good idea, surely

      Keeps them out of your own back yard.

  10. jestersbro
    Coat

    Johnson!

    Tee hee, you wrote "and a snap of a recovering Johnson here"!

  11. CD001

    WTF...

    ----

    Johnson, meanwhile, was reluctantly whisked to Charleville Hospital. The battling nonagenarian said: "I wasn't going to go but I was pretty bruised and scratched up. My son made me. I'm okay, although the roo took a chunk of flesh out of my leg and there's a chance they'll have to operate."

    ----

    Seriously?

    That's one tough old bat... and I mean that in a respectful way :)

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    To quote Terry Pratchett...

    "Death held out a hand, I WANT, he said, A BOOK ABOUT THE DANGEROUS CREATURES OF FOURECKS—

    Albert looked up and dived for cover, receiving only mild bruising because he had the foresight to curl into a ball.

    After a while Death, his voice a little muffled, said: ALBERT, I WOULD BE SO GRATEFUL IF YOU COULD GIVE ME A HAND HERE.

    Albert scrambled up and pulled at some of the huge volumes, finally dislodging enough of them to allow his master to clamber free.

    HMM . . . Death picked up a book at random and read the cover.

    DANGEROUS MAMMALS, REPTILES, AMPHIBIANS, BIRDS, FISH, JELLYFISH, INSECTS, SPIDERS, CRUSTACEANS, GRASSES, TREES, MOSSES, AND LICHENS OF TERROR INCOGNITA, he read. His gaze moved down the spine. VOLUME 29C, he added. OH. PART THREE, I SEE.

    He glanced up at the listening shelves. POSSIBLY IT WOULD BE SIMPLER IF I ASKED FOR A LIST OF THE HARMLESS CREATURES OF THE AFORESAID CONTINENT?

    They waited.

    IT WOULD APPEAR THAT—

    'No, wait, master. Here it comes.'

    Albert pointed to something white zigzagging lazily through the air. Finally Death reached up and caught the single sheet of paper.

    He read it carefully and then turned it over briefly just in case anything was written on the other side.

    'May I?' said Albert. Death handed him the paper.

    ' "Some of the sheep," ' Albert read aloud."

  13. Fred Flintstone Gold badge
    Joke

    Roo the day..

    .. when kangaroos learn to use pepper spray themselves.

    :-)

  14. Doogs

    Trained

    Apparently it was someone's "pet" they'd trained to box.

    Figures.

  15. Roger Jenkins

    Oh yes, I forgot a title

    'Queensland Parks and Wildlife Services and police eventually trapped the animal, and are pondering just what it was doing in the area'.

    Wondering what it was doing in the area? Jees, Charleville is halfway to the back of beyond, there are more roos than people out that way. Ponder? No need, it was living in the area.

    For those who don't know, the back of beyond is about where the Black Stump is and it's a long way from nowhere. Charleville is about nowhere.

  16. Ken 16 Silver badge
    Coat

    Police B'ROO-tality?

    I'll get my coat!

  17. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
    Pint

    Where's Tank Girl?

    She wants her Booga back.

  18. John Dougald McCallum
    Joke

    Re:what to do with the roo

    I need a new set of leathers,next to horse hide Roo hide makes the best leather for this nice and supple.

  19. Neil of Qld

    Re: Kangaroos

    I, for one, welcome our new Kangaroo overlords.

  20. Martin Budden Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Mr

    If there are *many* unusual calls to the police, they're not unusual.

  21. Nick Galloway

    Invaders beware

    This shows why the Australian military doesn't need all of its smart weaponry as the mix of local inhabitants and the wildlife are enough to create havoc for a ground force invasion. I wonder if Gaddafi has been importing Kangaroos and Australian pensioners???

  22. Craig 28

    Re:Not unusual...

    If they receive many different kinds of unusual calls they're still unusual. They only become usual when the same kind of call becomes routine.

    Of course I wouldn't be surprised if Aus police get a fair number of stray fauna related callouts.

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