back to article Two fat atoms get the nod

If you’re the kind of person to lay out more than US$8,000 on a periodic table coffee table, The International Union of Pure and Applied Chemistry (IUPAC) has bad news for you: it’s obsolete. That’s because after deliberations lasting more than a decade, and a review process begun in 2008, the Joint Working Party on the …

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Silver badge
Happy

Far out!

And cosmic baby!!!

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Coat

Yeah well ...

I've invented Maggioreium by bombarding my skeleton's Calcium atoms with protactinium nuclei whilst standing in a zinc bucket filled with pigshit.

It has a half-life of 10−43 seconds and decays into one Carbon atom and four Hydrogen atoms. Through the power of 'make-believe'™.

Honestly -- sober up. These are not real elements you're talking about. Its the stuff of unicorns and bread-and-butterflies.

Scientific reportage has become a joke. The modern trend for dismantling 'standards' is outrageous. Neither wonder people have no interest in (what passes for) science today.

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Facepalm

Just....wow

I'm sitting here seriously trying to decipher through the medium of text alone if you are serious, or the sarcasm intended to carry with this post got lost in the sea of mark-up and cascading stylesheets that is the internet.

I'd love to know how you come to the conclusion that these "are not real elements" despite the fact they have been created, observed and interacted with in a repeatable way.

Contrast this with the following statement: "Scientific reportage has become a joke". I have news - the "reportage" of anything is a joke, what with reportage being a made up word - the stuff of unicorns if you will. By the way, as a side note, both "bread" and "butterflies" exist, at least one certainly exists at home in my fridge and the other existed up until it's arse went through its head as it impacted my windscreen on my way to work this morning.

If this is a joke, then I accept I'm wrong, but seriously, you really are a special kind of moron.

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Hostility towards what one doesn't understand...

...doesn't make it go away.

And what's with the "dismantling standards" comment? You think the Periodic Table just sprang into being as a complete "standard"? It took over a hundred years of research to come up with the table and to understand the interrelationships between the elements recorded in it.

These researchers are just continuing in the footsteps of many others, and being damn careful about making sure that what they are doing is accurate and reproducible. You know, doing science.

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Why not?

Why shouldn't these elements be counted?

Because they have half-lives of seconds or less?

If so, what do you consider a minimum half-life?

Because they can't be found in nature?

There's no reason to believe that these didn't exist, briefly, just after the Big Bang.

There may still be places in the universe that are energic enough that they can be created 'naturally'.

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FAIL

Congratulations to the El Reg donkey.

For it's first posting!

Didn't know you had called it Craiggy...

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Trollface

Progress is a bitch!

If change hits you that hard, then I suggest going back to the Air, Fire, Earth and Water system.

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Boffin

Err, actually....

There is every reason to believe that these didn't exist after the big bang, as pretty much the only substance to come out of the initial cooling phase was hydrogen, followed by a brief period when a few light elements up to berylium were created. All other elements got created much later in stars as a result of fusion.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Bang_nucleosynthesis#Heavy_elements

GJC

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Happy

You didn't invent it...

..because *everything* was created 6,000 years ago, remember? You only *discovered* it.

Speaking of which - we've not heard from the creationist nutters in a while?

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Boffin

Supernovae

Maybe not in the big bang.

Almost certainly created in supernova explosions (which is where all the elements on Earth heavier than Iron were created, by bashing lighter nuclei together. (That's much the same way as scientists have created these short-lived superheavy nuclei, but on a much bigger scale ;-)

Any dividing line between an element and some more transient entity has to be completely arbitrary. One can separate stable nuclei from unstable ones, but that would exclude the fairly common naturally-occuring elements Uranium, Thorium and (maybe) Bismuth as well as their shorter-lived decay products. (Bismuth is a "maybe" challenging even that division. Theory suggests it's unstable with a VERY long half-life around 2*10^19 years, but the decay hasn't been observed because it's so rare).

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Facepalm

What have I started?

See title.

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Moscow Orblast?

You probably mean "Moscow oblast", meaning the Moscow region. Wouldn't it be simpler to say that the element is simply named after Moscow?

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Pint

Inevitable pun...

They shouldn't be Russian these new elements into the Periodic Table.

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Gimp

BTW ...

Its Copernicium not copernium.

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A relevant question:

Were you standing in a zinc bucket full of pigshit when you took that picture?

We have a right to know! (Actually, we don't. I'm just saying stuff.)

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Pluto

Will Pluto eventually be classed as an atom rather than a planet?

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Coat

Bluto

I thought it already had?

Plutonium

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Boffin

Unobtainium

It's about time we recognised unobtainium, the element which makes certain consumer products unaccountably expensive. For instance, Apple products use a thin vapour-deposited coating of unobtainium on their outer casing, which is why they cost three times more than anything else on the market of equivalent specification. It's also speculated that Leica uses unobtanium in its range of cameras and lenses.

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Oakley

have trademarked the name Unobtanium - they use it in their sunglasses, although I suspect it's actually just a type of plastic...

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Joke

Short Your Gold

Anybody else see a bubble here? Once this one pops, we'll be happy to keep C & O

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Joke

Discovered in Russia

If they were discovered in America they would have to change the names from Copernicium to Copernicum and from flerovium to flerovum. I'm not sure why Americium isn't Americum as well...

OK I'll get me coat. It's the one with the alumin-i-um can in the pocket...

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Joke

I think you mean..

..aloominum

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Alien

Actually Element 115 is acknowledged.

Element 115 is known since the early 90s and bears the name Elerium. Though it is beyond me how they think to replicate it outside Cydonia...

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Pint

I presume they are also deliberating . . .

on Administratum. You know :-

1 neutron

125 assistant neutrons

75 vice-neutrons

111 assistant vice-neutrons

etc.

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Coat

Un-unium?

I think that my shower curtain already has these called ununium and suchlike (but sadly no unobtainium which was always required in my last company).

Even people who haven't seen Penny step out from behind it in the Bing Bang Theory think it's cool. (Does that mean I have sad friends?)

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Unofficial names.

The "Unun" names you describe are tentative names given to stuff like element 113 when a submission is given. It's the scientific circle's way of saying, "It might exist, but give us time to verify it." Once it's officially recognized, then it gets a more common name, usually based on the circumstances of its discovery (Many of the heaviest elements have this basis for their names).

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Periodic Coffee Table?

Not interested unless its radioactivity is strong enough to keep my pot of tea warm.

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It's a lot nicer than some coffee tables I've seen...

Actually, that periodic coffee table has spaces reserved all the way up to element 118. So there. Theodore Grey's momma didn't raise no fools.

Second, Oakleys would almost certainly have a quiet word about trying to name anything after it's ear-sock and nose-piece wondermaterial.

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WTF?

Vague specifications?

Uhhm, when we asked for a "table of the elements" this is not what we had in mind. Better charge $8500 for it to recover some of the development costs.

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IT Angle

Nice table, but why the label?!

What's the bleeding point of a table saying "coffee table"? And if you're too dense to know it's the periodic table then this is not the product for you [I have this lead coffee table for you then]. Without text/title it would look better (and the market would be bigger!).

You'd think a bit of style would go with that kind of money, but no.

All in all a poor execution of a simple idea (we've all seen similar tables, e.g. for a wedding present make a table with similar little boxes, and let all friends & families drop in mementos; or fill them with beach sand from every holiday you've taken).

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Trollface

If we're naming them after Soviet inventions

Why not Chernobylium?

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Finally

This ununhexium bit is getting a bit long in the tooth. Can we just call the rest Tomium, Dickinium and Harrietium?

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Happy

That coffee table from the link

what a rip off!

Betcha all the gases are just normal air in a jar. And what's with all the radioactives missing, including the 'natural' ones? I *want* the radioactives!

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Mushroom

Radioactives included!

They give you Thorium and Uranium (and Bismuth). All the other naturally-occurring radioactives will be present within one or other or those samples, via radioactive decay.

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No.

Transuranic elements ,cannot be assigned where life exists.

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Pirate

All of them?

I can accept that the occasional atom of francium or astatine would have a transient existence in a large enough sample of uranium. But where would the technetium and promethium come from?

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Boffin

Good news everyone!

But when are we going to get Jumbonium!

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Bronze badge

Theodore Grey's momma didn't raise no fools.

Quite....which is why he gets some of those elements from me.....not the radioactives, obviously.

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Happy

"Moscow Orblast"

Hi Richard,

Just thought I'd kindly let you know that the name for an administrative region in Russia is 'Oblast'.

Furthermore, I would like to compliment you on your numerous quality articles recently. You are indeed a valuable addition to the Reg team. Keep up the good work!

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Someone contact Tom Lehrer

The songs going to need another line added.

There's Antimony, Arsenic, Aluminum,Selinium

and Hydrogen and Oxygen and Nitrogen and Rhenium...

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Thumb Up

time to start a campaign...

to get one of them named "Elregicum"

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Boffin

Merry go round

Weren't they going to come up with a fairground of new elements based on specific variations in spin of the quarks of the component particles in known elements?

Dammit I want my periodic spin table.

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