California preacher Harold Camping is unrepentant following his second unsuccessful attempt to predict Judgment Day, and now says true believers should pack their bags for ascension to heaven on 21 October. Camping's first stab at nailing the Rapture advised Christians to get their earthly affairs in order before 6 September …
He missed it by one day only!
Camper's whole doomsday already happend, just neither him nor many others noticed the ascension crap but proof is at El very Reg: only the only REALLY holynoshitty iThing ascended to heaven in due time: http://www.theregister.co.uk/2011/05/20/vaz_ipad_nicked/
How to correctly claim this to the insurer remains to be seen but given that the world as we knew it already ended it that doesn't really matter, does it?
as already mentioned...
acts of god tend not to be covered ;)
for spouting the bullshite and FREAKS listening to him.
Clearly a case for sectioning.
guess what he says on 22nd?
er... 3rd time lucky???
What he says on 22nd
"My bad everyone. It turns out it was all a load of Bronze-age superstition that some of us all took a bit too seriously. Now how about we all stop blowing each other up over who's invisible friend is best and just - y'know - get on."
Well I can dream, can't I?
This *is* his third attempt :)
"er... 3rd time lucky???"
More like 4th.
He's had a previous go at this and it did not work out then.
Numerical overflow bugs can be *so* pernicious.
Third time lucky?
More like 3 strikes and you're out!
That's what happens when...
...you try to do math w/ NaNs. (You don't really think deific math is done with rational numbers, do you?)
if he lives long enough he'll get it right, one day.
really? the bible?
are you sure??
i thought it was just an unbelieveable jewish folk tale about a snake and an apple.
oh yes i was/am/will be correct.
rupture - my arse
That depends which part you read
If you read the "Song of Songs" part it can also be considered as a very believable Jewish folk tale about T*TS and SH*GGING.
If you take the text literally of course...
Rupture your arse?
I'll have to say "thanks but no thanks" to that offer!
Seems he's going for the "I'm bound to get it right eventually" approach.
He clearly isn't very good at calculating probability (although, if it happens before his prediction, I don't suppose anyone would take him up on it).
Ha Ha Harold is a fraud.
OMG, I'm loving evey minute of this, how stupid can some people be?
we're all going to die I tells ya......
I'm not religious..
but isn't there something in that book about False Prophets?
There's something in that book about it being easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. It doesn't stop these bastards lining their pockets.
It's easier to pass a camel through the eye of a needle...
...if you pass it through a liquidiser first.
Credit where it's due.
You got that idea from seeing this Luke Surl cartoon, didn't you?
I've never previously heard of the guy nor seen his poorly drawn comics. I do however admit that this particular aphorism isn't my own: I got it from Les Barker, the comedic poet.
I stand corrected.
Wonder if Surl is a Barker fan?
Is this like String Theory?
Make test! Reality doesn't comply? No problem, clarify what you _really_ wanted to say.
Also, imaginary friends in the sky etc.
he's not the first...Homer Simpson made one too...
Crayon up his nose
Has our hero got one like Homer?
That is all.
Got his maths right now has he? Removed the imaginary numbers from his equations perhaps?
"Camping now says he simply misinterpreted the word of God"
As do the millions of others who use the so called word of god to control, manipulate and subjugate the gullible.
Because scripture and the alleged word of god are usually interpreted to agree with and support the motive, morality and agenda of those doing the interpreting. I would be very surprised if a correct and unbiased interpretation of any scripture ever surfaced.
You're just jealous
because you got left behind.
Re: you got left behind
Isn't that a more reasonable explanation? That this guy got his sums right but last Saturday there *were* no righteous folks worth taking up and so we're all damned in five months? You've got to admit, it fits the evidence.
I would have been positively offended had I not been left behind, personally.
Who'd notice, really?
3 million to be saved, and 7 billion + on the planet - That's less than 3 in 7000 to be 'saved' - I bet on an average day, there are more than 3 in 7000 missing persons cases, world-wide. If indeed a 'rapture' were to happen, I'm willing to bet no one notices it.
3 in 7000 is 0.04%. At that attrition rate, half the world's population would go missing in 1,617 days, which is about four and a half years. I'm willing to bet we'd be noticing if persons went missing at that rate.
The global death rate is about 155,000 people per day, currently. Three million "saved" could be gleaned in twenty days at that rate, and REALLY nobody would notice.
That is all
"was not really the end of the world but the spiritual beginning of the physical end",
If that means he made himself look like an arse to most of the world then he is right.
Can someone just shut this guy up once and for all..?! I'm bored now...
Should be jailed
Harold is a confidence trickster, plain and simple. He is lying to people to extract money. Couldn't someone bring criminal charges against him?
The problem is that it is a confidence trick calling on the name of God, so no one wants to risk the hollier-than-thou argument and accuse him of anything.
If you wrap yourself up in enough religious trappings you can get away with almost anything - even rape.
The law doesn't notice religion
Plenty of people claiming religious authority end up being found guilty in court. If there's a problem, it's more that the victims are called on to forgive the perpetrator (and do so). For serious crimes, this still doesn't stop the law provided they can obtain enough evidence.
I'm not saying there isn't a time and place for forgiveness, but it shouldn't prevent the law from following its normal course. Harold is clearly continuing to make fraudulent claims and should be stopped. He cannot claim the Bible supports his statements either, because it also expressly warns against people who do this. In other words, this was always serious fraud whether you claim to be a Christian or not.
Makes perfect sense really
Camping clearly underestimated the length of time it takes to spend his ill-gotten $70 million.
So, is everyone ready for The Great Disappointment 2.0?
The Great Disappointment 2.0?
It's actually 3.0 this time :)
This is merely a refinement on Disappointment 2.0, so it should be 2.1, no?
well now that's just asking for trouble as more people world wide are aware of this moron and his predictions and so greater lampoonings can be prepared for. He must be a glutton for punishment - unless he dies first (which he's probably banking on).
Predictive FAIL enabled
One born every minute...
... and I fail to see how much more of an arse he is than the others I-have-an-invisible-bearded-friend-in-the-sky types (or the "astrologues"). He is however a bit more ridiculous, everyone in the business knows the absolute rule is "never give hard deadlines", that's just distributing sticks and begging to be beaten with'em.
Actually his strategy is quite alright: if he or his followers keep predicting the end of the world for long enough they will probably end up being right once (although I'm not sure about this rapture thing; I feel like it might be a bit hard to breathe from the stratosphere up)
This ones for the doom prophet...
Genesis - land of confusion
Highly appropriate methinks.
Paris - equally predictable
Appropriate in this case but Genesis have something extra special for TV evangelists.
Look up "Jesus he knows me (and he knows I'm right)"
Another good choice but its the video that sells it for land of confusion, I can see this guy riding a dinosaur to the apocalypse.
so do the Levellers - "Plastic Jesus"
Double standards again
If I stand out in public saying that I hear voices and screaming at the top of my voice that they're telling me that the world is going to end I'd get a nice new jacket with the long sleeves that tie up round the back.
But apparently if I claim that the voice in my head is god I would instead get media coverage.
Both, most likely.
What an absolute prick
Hopefully his followers won't be so deluded next time around.
- Does Apple's iOS 7 make you physically SICK? Try swallowing version 7.1
- Pics Indestructible Death Stars blow up planets with glowing KILL RAY
- Hands on Satisfy my scroll: El Reg gets claws on Windows 8.1 spring update
- Video Snowden: You can't trust SPOOKS with your DATA
- 166 days later: Space Station astronauts return to Earth