back to article Japanese boffins build internet kissing machine

Researches in Japan are hard at work developing an internet-enabled kissing simulator that will allow lovers – or perfect strangers – to reach out and buss someone. "This device is for communications within the mouth," researcher Nobuhiro Takahashi of the Kajimoto Laboratory at The University of Electro-Communications in Tokyo …

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"Researches in Japan are hard"; no doubt.

But methinks they should get out more ... There's a big, wide, world out there, full of likewise single, horny & wanting a bit MOTAS ...

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Paris Hilton

"the goal is to obtain the feeling of kissing."

Poor guy. It hasn't worked out with the usual facebook/online-ads/etc for him, so instead he builds a robot to finally experience that elusive kissing thing? The mind boggles.

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Badgers

Norton has detected a virus.

Girls germs!

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Go

Competitive tongue hockey!

This device looks like it could be used like an arm-wrestle for the tongue! By remote (which is probably for the best).

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Paris Hilton

Prime mover of technology is always...

I can see a version of this being popular with the live sex shows but instead of lips to lips contact it'll be lips to other parts!

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JDX
Gold badge

eew

see title

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Futurama moment

"Commence lip identification scan."

Mmm, mmm, mm.

"No tongue!"

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Yag
Paris Hilton

Nostalgia...

Makes me remember the old "fu-fme" of last millenia :)

Warning : Following link is quite not safe for work...

http://img511.imageshack.us/img511/9334/fufmeem1.jpg

Paris... well... guess why :p

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re: Nostalgia...

Hah, Fu-fme, always wondered what happened with that page

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Paris Hilton

You what?

" Takahashi agrees that much more needs to be done to enhance the K-LRMCD's stimulatory capabilities. "The elements of a kiss include the sense of taste, the manner of breathing, and the moistness of the tongue," "

and I always thought kissing involved touching lips.

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WTF?

Yuk!

That's gross!!

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Silver badge

Something missing?

Where's the 'garlic sausage' flavour going to come from? How can it transmit 'old ashtray' or 'stale beer and vomit' flavours?

Does it have an 'Ancient Relative Fish' setting?

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Coffee/keyboard

Why a tube?

.. will saliva come out of it too?

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Joke

Scratch and Sniff

My friend and I have developed scratch and sniff over the internet...Unfortunately, we've only managed one smell so far, It's called vegetarian fart. The user scratches the image on the screen, then sticks his finger up his rear and sniffs. We've been 100 per cent successful in trials!!

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Coat

lolwhut?

lolwhut indeed.

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It is very telling ...

... that he couldn't find a lady to help demonstrate his device.

If he doesn't have a g/f now, this device will ensure he remains without. That's probably for the best!

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Joke

They may have some teething problems...

..but I'm sure they'll soon have them licked

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Nice...

...presumably Google are already working on what ads to display to you based on your technique.

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WTF?

Japanese are weird

No, seriously, they are!

Daddy, what were you doing when the 2011 Tsunami hit? Well, son, you see, I was developing my Internet kissing machine.

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Coat

Someone has to say this: it sucks..

Or maybe it wouldn't if it did (I leave you mentally sort that one out while I make my escape).

Thank you, and good night. The trilby, please.

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FAIL

I expect...

....that the robotised Real Doll with this capability will be along eventually...

....one more step to making the lonely more lonely...

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Coat

Not serious surely!

A bit tongue in cheek.

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Sad. </eom>

The post is required, and must contain letters.

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Boffin

Looks like

quantum entanglement to me - spukhafte Fernwirkung !...

Henri

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Hmmm.....

I know where my missus will stick that thing!

She's such a dirty girl.

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