MYSTERY of huge Canadian chicken-shed EXPLOSION
The Mounties have confessed themselves baffled after a Canadian chicken shed blew up in a huge, devastating explosion whose shockwaves were "felt across southern Manitoba", according to reports. The Red River Valley Echo has the story, reporting that a "large chicken barn which used to be part of the landscape" exploded in a " …
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Foul play?
How could you miss that one, Lewis, it's so obvious.
Re: Foul play
But then again, the article says foul (fowl?) play is not suspected. Not surprisingly, since the shed was empty at the time.
@Foul play
It was to easier.
You know I'm thinking of this song by dead prez.
Once upon a time
There was a very serious situation growing
There was a farmer and a farmyard filled with animals
And this is the story of their times
Verse 1
Old man sammy had a farm
Walked the land with the wife
Most of the time shit was calm
His whole life was maintained off the everyday labor
From the mules in the field to the cattle in the stable
This is how we kept food on this table (maxing)
You would have he was disabled by the way he be relaxing
Acting like mr. magnificent
But the animals were thinking something different
The sentiment was tension in the barnyard
Throughout the years they had been through mad drama
With the farmer, word is bond
And they all came to one conclusion
They argued there was no way they'd ever be free
If it was up to humans
Therefore the only course left was revolution which was understandable
And since the pigs promised to lead in the interest of all the animals
They planned a full attack
Under the leadership of hannibal
The fattest pig in the pack
The next morning on the farm
Everything was calm
Just before dawn
But before long
The sun got so hot it made the farm seem electric
Now check it
This is when that shit got hectic
Directed by hannibal, the animals attacked
Old sam was in a state of shock
And fell up on his back
And dropped his rifle
Reaching in vain
Each and every creature from the field at his throat
Screaming "kill, feel the pain."
Chorus
This is the animal in man
This is the animal in you
This is the animal in man
Coming true (2x)
Verse 2
After they ran the farmer off the farm
The pigs went around and called a meeting in the barn
Hannibal spoke for several hours
But when talks about his plans for power
That's when the conversation turned sour
He issued an offical ordinance to set
If not a pig from this day forth then you insubordinate
That's when the horses went buckwild
One of them shouted out
"you fraudulent pigs, we know your fucking style!"
Hannibal's face was flushed and pale
All the animals eyes full of disgust and betrayal
He felt the same way sam felt
They took his tongue out of his mouth
And cut his body up for sale, for real
You better listen while you can
Its a very thin line between animal and man
When hannibal crossed the line they all took a stand
What would have done?
Shook his hand?
This is the animal in man
And how could _I_ miss it.
And now I see the fowl in the sub-heading. Now I feel as stupid as a headless chicken.
a plot
Shirley this is the work of commie chickens - a conspiratorial cabal of Rhode Island Reds.
commie chickens
Well of course it is, and don't call me Shirley.
Total non story
Total non-story, no chicken casualties are reported nor are any ever likely to occur, the fear-mongering mainstream press are greatly exaggerating the threat to poultry from exploding Canadian sheds, since for the amount of shed released into the Canadian prairies a chicken would have to stand on the same spot for over a year in order to raise its chance of being hit by flying splinters by 0.0002%. The truth is the Mounties are simply bowing to public pressure to declare the sky is falling in.
Methane
although relatively difficult you can produce methane from chicken shit. Right conditions for fairly complex reactions can occur naturally, we are evidence of that.
clean shed
I suspected that at first, but TFA said the shed was clean...
Organic dust
Organic "dust" (like flour, but also straw dust etc) is quite flammable when in suspension in the air. Where I grew up, explosions due to dust were one of the most feared dangers during harvests as they are capable of destroying large and expensive equipment. Basically some dust in suspension causes a rather small explosion, which brings more dust in the air, leading to a big kaboom, even in comparatively small and air-deprived silos.
Scaled up to match the volume of that shed, I can imagine a HUGE explosion indeed.
There would have had to be some organic dust in there to begin with, but it's not hard to imagine that there could have been some (residues? Empty shed used as storage?), and you don't need much. the limiting factor in smaller silos is the quantity of air, not dust.
Clean is relative.
> I suspected that at first, but TFA said the shed was clean...
I was raised on a farm.
Clean only means that the air in the chicken house was more or less breathable without protection.
That you wouldn't instantly collapse and die on the floor.
The title is required, and must contain chickens
Has it ever been conclusively proved there were no large chicken sheds at Tunguska?
Perhaps the veils are finally being lifted on that long-standing Russian mystery...
Insurance Job?
Type your comment here -- plain text only, no HTML, XML or other voodoo allowed.
Re: Insurance Job?
Is it too much to ask that you put your comment in the comment bit?
the title bit
i suspect he's one of the "i won't write a title" malcontents that seem to form the majority of El Reg commentators
Sorry...
Yes in this case I could think of zilch, that's why I got 'inspired' and copied the default guff and spiced it up a bit. Now then, back to that STONERS ARE DESTROYING THE PLANET story...
Where...
...was Henny Penny & Chicken Licken when they were needed? Crossing the road? Poultry in motion?
Right then, definitely time to flee...
Propane tanks intact
But are they empty? Sounds like a gas explosion.
Gas or powder?
I first thought of a powdered chicken-shit explosion, like those that happen in flour mills occasionally, but the article said it was clean. The size of the explosion as described, suggests the whole building was full of a near-stoichiometric mixture of propane & air. Perhaps the tanks were empty because they had all just leaked out into the building.
PS Sarah, we need a nuclear mushroom icon for even bigger kabooms.
Re: Gas or powder?
Indeed... For the tank to be damaged it would either have to had the explosion occur inside it, or it would have had to be subjected to prolonged heat. Neither happened here, but a leak of gas into the building sounds good to me.
What ignited it is a good question, but congratulations on getting the mixture spot on! Approx 15:1 of C3H8 in a shed that size... Gonna be impressive!
Reminds me of Cows with Guns
Tom Lehrer:
From behind all the guns,
behind all the coppers,
Came the deafening roar
of chickens in choppers
Reminds me of...
...Dana Lyons
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQMbXvn2RNI
I recognise....
a firepower demonstration when I see one!
The little feathery bastards want another crack at world domination!
They just never got over not being dinosaurs any more.
Evolution can be a bitch.
P.S. All chickens are evil.
Not all chickens are evil
A dead chicken is a good chicken, and southern fried it is a fine chicken.
The sky is falling
Big egg-splosion ... Easter Bunny blamed ... Provisional KFC denies responsibility ... Local residents shell-shocked ... Insurance company pays out a poultry sum ...
Undoubtedly Smokers will get the blame
Why not, we get the blame for everything else. <sigh>
I can see the headline now;
"Bigfoot Butt Blows Barn"
Right now poor old Sasquatch is rolling in the snow to soothe his singed skin and swearing off cigs for the next
Any old chicken barn will fill with methane so all it needs is a statically charged leaf or piece of discarded plastic to blow against a suitable earth-point and zap-BigBadaBOOOOOOOOM!!
Oh well, I imagine it's well ventilated now. <LOL>
Yep...
...they meant to take out one of the BC weed 'grow houses' but dialled in the wrong grid reference. Word on the street says a lot of Vietnamese guys in Canada are wiping their brow fervently.
Aye!
I was thinking the same thing but didn't want to Haarp on it. Most folk are afraid to publicly address conspireggcies.
Big Bang
There's nothing in the laws of quantum physics to prevent chicken barns from just blowing up occasionally. It's quite possible, just extremely improbable. Elsewhere in the multiverse there will be countless other chicken barns that did not blow up for no reason.
Typical - blame the chickens
"They don't plot, they don't scheme, and they are *not* organized."
Alternately a large contained space filled with fine aerosol powder of highly combustible feather, feed and bedding remains ignited - like the great Norwich custard explosion
Re: Blame the chickens
But the chickens are revolting.
*wanders off to watch some more wallace and grommit*
Obviously..
.. the work of well armed disgruntled Canadian geese
"used to be part of the landscape"
"It was like somebody chopped it up into little pieces and just flung it everywhere,"
Surely that means it is still part of the landscape?
You mean...
As a bomb-disposal officer once said, "one mistake and you're geography."
Inside, but not part of.
If we use the definition of landscape as "an expanse of scenery that can be seen in a single view," then the shed is undoubtedly no longer part of it, as it cannot be seen. Granted, it's *inside* the landscape...
clean shed
bet its connected to a sewage system of some form though....
It's a cover-up for the secret Canuck nuke programme
obviously
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