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back to article MYSTERY of huge Canadian chicken-shed EXPLOSION

The Mounties have confessed themselves baffled after a Canadian chicken shed blew up in a huge, devastating explosion whose shockwaves were "felt across southern Manitoba", according to reports. The Red River Valley Echo has the story, reporting that a "large chicken barn which used to be part of the landscape" exploded in a " …

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Grenade

My Suspicion

Angry Pigs.

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: My Suspicion

Heh.

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@Ralph

You owe me a new keyboard! lol

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Anonymous Coward

Foul play?

How could you miss that one, Lewis, it's so obvious.

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Re: Foul play

But then again, the article says foul (fowl?) play is not suspected. Not surprisingly, since the shed was empty at the time.

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Bronze badge

@Foul play

It was to easier.

You know I'm thinking of this song by dead prez.

Once upon a time

There was a very serious situation growing

There was a farmer and a farmyard filled with animals

And this is the story of their times

Verse 1

Old man sammy had a farm

Walked the land with the wife

Most of the time shit was calm

His whole life was maintained off the everyday labor

From the mules in the field to the cattle in the stable

This is how we kept food on this table (maxing)

You would have he was disabled by the way he be relaxing

Acting like mr. magnificent

But the animals were thinking something different

The sentiment was tension in the barnyard

Throughout the years they had been through mad drama

With the farmer, word is bond

And they all came to one conclusion

They argued there was no way they'd ever be free

If it was up to humans

Therefore the only course left was revolution which was understandable

And since the pigs promised to lead in the interest of all the animals

They planned a full attack

Under the leadership of hannibal

The fattest pig in the pack

The next morning on the farm

Everything was calm

Just before dawn

But before long

The sun got so hot it made the farm seem electric

Now check it

This is when that shit got hectic

Directed by hannibal, the animals attacked

Old sam was in a state of shock

And fell up on his back

And dropped his rifle

Reaching in vain

Each and every creature from the field at his throat

Screaming "kill, feel the pain."

Chorus

This is the animal in man

This is the animal in you

This is the animal in man

Coming true (2x)

Verse 2

After they ran the farmer off the farm

The pigs went around and called a meeting in the barn

Hannibal spoke for several hours

But when talks about his plans for power

That's when the conversation turned sour

He issued an offical ordinance to set

If not a pig from this day forth then you insubordinate

That's when the horses went buckwild

One of them shouted out

"you fraudulent pigs, we know your fucking style!"

Hannibal's face was flushed and pale

All the animals eyes full of disgust and betrayal

He felt the same way sam felt

They took his tongue out of his mouth

And cut his body up for sale, for real

You better listen while you can

Its a very thin line between animal and man

When hannibal crossed the line they all took a stand

What would have done?

Shook his hand?

This is the animal in man

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Anonymous Coward

And how could _I_ miss it.

And now I see the fowl in the sub-heading. Now I feel as stupid as a headless chicken.

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Alert

a plot

Shirley this is the work of commie chickens - a conspiratorial cabal of Rhode Island Reds.

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Grenade

commie chickens

Well of course it is, and don't call me Shirley.

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Coat

Eggsactly!

(What the cluck?)

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Grenade

Total non story

Total non-story, no chicken casualties are reported nor are any ever likely to occur, the fear-mongering mainstream press are greatly exaggerating the threat to poultry from exploding Canadian sheds, since for the amount of shed released into the Canadian prairies a chicken would have to stand on the same spot for over a year in order to raise its chance of being hit by flying splinters by 0.0002%. The truth is the Mounties are simply bowing to public pressure to declare the sky is falling in.

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Methane

although relatively difficult you can produce methane from chicken shit. Right conditions for fairly complex reactions can occur naturally, we are evidence of that.

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clean shed

I suspected that at first, but TFA said the shed was clean...

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Silver badge

Organic dust

Organic "dust" (like flour, but also straw dust etc) is quite flammable when in suspension in the air. Where I grew up, explosions due to dust were one of the most feared dangers during harvests as they are capable of destroying large and expensive equipment. Basically some dust in suspension causes a rather small explosion, which brings more dust in the air, leading to a big kaboom, even in comparatively small and air-deprived silos.

Scaled up to match the volume of that shed, I can imagine a HUGE explosion indeed.

There would have had to be some organic dust in there to begin with, but it's not hard to imagine that there could have been some (residues? Empty shed used as storage?), and you don't need much. the limiting factor in smaller silos is the quantity of air, not dust.

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Clean is relative.

> I suspected that at first, but TFA said the shed was clean...

I was raised on a farm.

Clean only means that the air in the chicken house was more or less breathable without protection.

That you wouldn't instantly collapse and die on the floor.

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Black Helicopters

The title is required, and must contain chickens

Has it ever been conclusively proved there were no large chicken sheds at Tunguska?

Perhaps the veils are finally being lifted on that long-standing Russian mystery...

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Silver badge

read Niven.

That was a quantum black hole.

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Grenade

Insurance Job?

Type your comment here -- plain text only, no HTML, XML or other voodoo allowed.

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: Insurance Job?

Is it too much to ask that you put your comment in the comment bit?

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jai
Silver badge

the title bit

i suspect he's one of the "i won't write a title" malcontents that seem to form the majority of El Reg commentators

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Happy

Sorry...

Yes in this case I could think of zilch, that's why I got 'inspired' and copied the default guff and spiced it up a bit. Now then, back to that STONERS ARE DESTROYING THE PLANET story...

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Coat

Where...

...was Henny Penny & Chicken Licken when they were needed? Crossing the road? Poultry in motion?

Right then, definitely time to flee...

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I believe -

it was insured for a poultry sum.

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Bronze badge

No doubt

Somebody was attempting a coop d'etat.

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Flame

Propane tanks intact

But are they empty? Sounds like a gas explosion.

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Flame

Gas or powder?

I first thought of a powdered chicken-shit explosion, like those that happen in flour mills occasionally, but the article said it was clean. The size of the explosion as described, suggests the whole building was full of a near-stoichiometric mixture of propane & air. Perhaps the tanks were empty because they had all just leaked out into the building.

PS Sarah, we need a nuclear mushroom icon for even bigger kabooms.

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Re: Gas or powder?

Indeed... For the tank to be damaged it would either have to had the explosion occur inside it, or it would have had to be subjected to prolonged heat. Neither happened here, but a leak of gas into the building sounds good to me.

What ignited it is a good question, but congratulations on getting the mixture spot on! Approx 15:1 of C3H8 in a shed that size... Gonna be impressive!

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Powdered chicken shit

in flour mills?

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Silver badge

Reminds me of Cows with Guns

Tom Lehrer:

From behind all the guns,

behind all the coppers,

Came the deafening roar

of chickens in choppers

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WTF?

Reminds me of...

...Dana Lyons

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQMbXvn2RNI

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Go

I recognise....

a firepower demonstration when I see one!

The little feathery bastards want another crack at world domination!

They just never got over not being dinosaurs any more.

Evolution can be a bitch.

P.S. All chickens are evil.

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IT Angle

Not all chickens are evil

A dead chicken is a good chicken, and southern fried it is a fine chicken.

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Alien

Clearly the work..

of eggstraterrestrials.

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Linux

Chicken meth lab...

That is all.

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Coat

The sky is falling

Big egg-splosion ... Easter Bunny blamed ... Provisional KFC denies responsibility ... Local residents shell-shocked ... Insurance company pays out a poultry sum ...

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Grenade

Undoubtedly Smokers will get the blame

Why not, we get the blame for everything else. <sigh>

I can see the headline now;

"Bigfoot Butt Blows Barn"

Right now poor old Sasquatch is rolling in the snow to soothe his singed skin and swearing off cigs for the next

Any old chicken barn will fill with methane so all it needs is a statically charged leaf or piece of discarded plastic to blow against a suitable earth-point and zap-BigBadaBOOOOOOOOM!!

Oh well, I imagine it's well ventilated now. <LOL>

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HAARP

Yanks testing HAARP and missing.

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Terminator

Yep...

...they meant to take out one of the BC weed 'grow houses' but dialled in the wrong grid reference. Word on the street says a lot of Vietnamese guys in Canada are wiping their brow fervently.

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Alert

Aye!

I was thinking the same thing but didn't want to Haarp on it. Most folk are afraid to publicly address conspireggcies.

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Joke

Where did the chickens go on holiday?

Sandy Eggo.

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Boffin

Big Bang

There's nothing in the laws of quantum physics to prevent chicken barns from just blowing up occasionally. It's quite possible, just extremely improbable. Elsewhere in the multiverse there will be countless other chicken barns that did not blow up for no reason.

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Silver badge

Typical - blame the chickens

"They don't plot, they don't scheme, and they are *not* organized."

Alternately a large contained space filled with fine aerosol powder of highly combustible feather, feed and bedding remains ignited - like the great Norwich custard explosion

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Pint

Re: Blame the chickens

But the chickens are revolting.

*wanders off to watch some more wallace and grommit*

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Grenade

Obviously..

.. the work of well armed disgruntled Canadian geese

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Headmaster

"used to be part of the landscape"

"It was like somebody chopped it up into little pieces and just flung it everywhere,"

Surely that means it is still part of the landscape?

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Coat

You mean...

As a bomb-disposal officer once said, "one mistake and you're geography."

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Thumb Up

Inside, but not part of.

If we use the definition of landscape as "an expanse of scenery that can be seen in a single view," then the shed is undoubtedly no longer part of it, as it cannot be seen. Granted, it's *inside* the landscape...

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Silver badge

clean shed

bet its connected to a sewage system of some form though....

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Grenade

I blame

Foxes

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Anonymous Coward

It's a cover-up for the secret Canuck nuke programme

obviously

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