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back to article Online world maps rub jubs against todgers

It's Friday, and since you're all sitting around on your backsides waiting to head off to the pub, here's a challenge to fill a couple of dreary hours: just what interesting scientific conclusions can we draw from a comparison of the two following maps of breast size and penis length worldwide? Before beginning your …

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Paris Hilton

Hmmm.....

One thing is for sure: Size does NOT matter when it comes to population growth.....

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Happy

Reverse boast

I was going to say "Well, I guess it means I must be part-Russian" until I realised I was reading the chart upside-down.

So glad I avoided making a fool of myself...

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americans

have a smaller penis and bigger boobs than canadians

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Though hopefully not at the same time

Brazilians on the other hand. . .

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Alert

Scientific?

Science be damned. My conclusion is that I'm living in the wrong country when it comes to meeting women with big jubs! Scandinavia here we "come"!

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the french

are liying in the trouser department.

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Africa

So Ghanaians are well endowed, eh?

;)

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Paris Hilton

I call shennanigans on the penile data

Bra size can reasonably be mapped through analysing the sales statistics of Ladygarments but the size of a todger is surely anecdotal or a result of less than rigorous statistical recording. Funny that France and Italy have on average lager tackle than the rest of Europe. Bigging themselves up (literally), perhaps?

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Anonymous Coward

There is some serious data on penis size

Condom manufacturers and distributors commissioned it. I've seen a report on it, about 50 pages, IIRC. There isn't that much data, but it's surprisingly detailed. They even go into how the girth varies along the length. They're generally more interested in the "width" than the length, of course, as it doesn't matter too much if a condom is too long. Width, by the way, means half the circumference in this context, in case you ever find yourself trying to interpret such data, because they measure the width of a condom as it lies flat.

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smug... here in the Netherlands.

Nice to see the statistics match my own personal experience.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: smug... here in the Netherlands.

Have much experience of willies do you?

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Coat

Missed opportunity....

for a jub/todger ratio map.

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Alert

Odd scale for comparison...

As on the first map RED is GOOD (large breasts) whereas on the second map RED is BAD (small equipment). I wonder who chose those colours?

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Anonymous Coward

assumptions

While larger is better (within reason) is a fair assumption in the todger department, you shouldn't make the same judgement for boobs. Note to self, volunteer for next Chinese trade show duty...

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Unhappy

awww...

Looks like my trip to the Congo is out then... don't think I'll get a visa for that one... :(

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Anonymous Coward

Funny, but wrong..

That's definitely wrong in the nordic and slavic countries. The size of a todger tends to be related to height, so it's no surprise that oriental and asian men have slightly smaller todgers, but that doesn't apply to Russia, Denmark etc.

Breast size in the nordic countries tends to be smaller (at least in Norway and Sweden). Don't know about Russia etc, and I doubt the Russian/Ukranian pr0n I've seen is a particularly scientific way of knowing..

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Phew...

Glad I come from Northern Ireland, not the Republic...

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Pirate

penis map scale

I hope that is in centimeters, not inches...

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Pint

More Data Please!

I second the request for a jub/todger ratio map, and will add a request for the jub/todger data to be cross-referenced with the countries' obesity rates, as I'm sure there's a bit of correlation especially in the former.

Now, off to the pub to verify the Canadian data... Or maybe I should wait 'till lunch?

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Happy

"Now, off to the pub to verify the Canadian data..."

Men get their todgers out in Canadian pubs? Gross, I'm cancelling my planned trip to Montreal.

Very surprised to see Spanish women average 'B' cups. From my own lecherous observations, Spanish racks are the biggest and best in Europe.

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Ru
Heart

Cup size alone is an inadequate metric...

Spend some time comparing and contrasting, say, a 52FF with a 36D and you'll see what I mean.

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Certainly wrong for Israel

Having lived here for a while, I can assure you that an average of an a-cup is well out. In fact I'm struggling to think of even seeing an a-cup for the last few years...

From viewings, I'd say on average larger than the UK, which I'd guess putting around C-D cup average.

But considering how many women don't know how to measure correctly for bras, and the fact that UK and european sizes vary when you get to the larger sizes (europeans don't have double measurements, DD = E, E = F etc etc), I'm guess lots of errors can come in.

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Looks like we should move pr0n production

To South America. Big jubs and todgers!

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Joke

I heard the average Canadian..

... has one testicle.

It must be true, a Canadian told me, and the statistics don't lie ;-)

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Coat

Size matters?

What's the big deal? Mine is only about 3" if truth be told, but really just how wide does it need to be?

Yes I know. Coat...

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Joke

Mines only a couple of inches too....

Couple of inches off the ground that is...

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Coat

So,

Where does Lady Gaga fall on each of these charts?

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(Written by Reg staff) Silver badge

Re: So,

Bolivia and China, not sure which way round, though.

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@Where does Lady Gaga fall

And is that face up or face down?!

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Anonymous Coward

flaccid?

or otherwise?

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Anonymous Coward

Theory unsupported

The Ecuador, Peru, Bolivia and Paraguay corridor has men of above average size whilst the women have rather small breasts which seems to disprove a common belief about the magic properties of a certain creamy substance when either applied externally or taken orally.

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Troll

Re: Americans

have a smaller penis and *more* boobs than canadians

Corrected it for you.

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Stop

Africa

Penis size looks mostly ok. But African women with mostly small breasts? That seems wrong. Asia the smallest for both genders, and Africa the biggest for both genders.

Maybe barebreasted African village women have been measured as the smallest bra size possible?

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Happy

Superpowers compensating for something?

America, Russia, India and China are the world's most powerful nations, but all fall well into the lower percentile range. Compensating for much, chaps?

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Troll

Childhood memories

When I was very young, I lived in West Africa and never realised that it was considered surprising, in some places, that nice girls show off their assetts.

I found out quite quickly when we came back to the UK and older kids would hit me for describing what I had seen! Maybe they are referring to the length of these items. Some were not a pretty sight.

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Joke

Looking at the map...

at http://www.worldatlas.com/webimage/countrys/eulnd.htm

That proboscis north of the Urals 'looks a bit like a thingy' in full readiness

Amazingly, as it's tip is in permafrost.

Yet that bit above the 'n' in 'Scandinavian' looks like it's about to become a serious mouthful.

Damn Ruskies....And damn you, Lester. I can never look at an atlas again with a straight face...!

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FAIL

Significance?

Looks like they've got at most 5 data points per country in the boob dept. Hardly significant...

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