back to article NASA's Glory climate-data sat crashes into Pacific on launch

A NASA satellite intended to bring some hard facts to the climate-change debate has crashed into the sea after lifting off from California and failing to separate from its booster rocket. The "Glory" satellite carried two sensors, one intended for investigation of aerosols – particulates such as soot – in the atmosphere and …

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FAIL

Hello, Acme? I Would Like To...

...order some of your exploding [attachment devices.]

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FAIL

I Suggest...

....deployment of PARIS-based sensors....

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Black Helicopters

obviously a conspiracy

Well obviously someone doesn't wan't the masses to know the true answers to the questions that these satellites would have solved.

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Troll

Hmm

That's two satellites intended to investigate Climate Change which have failed. Obviously it's a conspiracy by denialists!

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Coat

Or likely....

Climate Change advocates, since they seem to have more people in leadership positions able to pull off a covert sabotage. :P

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Black Helicopters

Or is it?

Maybe it's a conspiracy by those who want to believe, but are afraid the data will prove them wrong? Or... maybe not...

"Climate Change is wrong" group:

"All right, men, let's blow this thing up! We don't want THEM finding anything to support their cause!"

"Climate Change is right" group:

"All right, men, let's blow this thing up! We don't want THEM finding anything to disprove our cause!"

NASA boffin:

"Wait... was that feet or meters? Eh, whatever..."

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Silver badge

Perhaps but

I don't think Denialists actually have any problem with real hard verifiable facts.

It's just that there's so few of them where 'man made climate change' is concerned.

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We're going to kidnap Pilate's wife

We thought of it first!

etc etc

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Alien

Mishap Investigation Board

So the MiB do exist...

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Black Helicopters

Intended to bring some hard facts?

But we don't WANT hard facts, they would disprove the entire scenario.

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Anonymous Coward

But if you don't have any hard facts yet ...

.. how do you know whether they'd disprove this "entire scenario"?

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Anonymous Coward

Double conspiracy

Of course the conspiracy would work both ways...

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Pint

With apologies to Mister Adams...

"We demand solid facts!"

"No, you fool, that is precisely what we DON'T demand!"

"Alright... we don't demand solid facts. What we demand is a total ABSENCE of solid facts. We demand RIGIDLY defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!"

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Black Helicopters

"They" don't want us to know

Loss of a second attempt to "accurately measure and assess" global warming contributors?

Well played. Launch a couple of stacks of bricks, claim technical failures, and you get to say you were trying to do something positive.

Absolutely black helicopter territory.

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Stop

Isn't this the 2nd..

..sat of it's ilk to spontaneously go pop? - the 1st was a couple of years back and was intended to monitor CO2.

And to make me even more suspicious it's being investigated by the M.I.B ? (Cue Will Smith).

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FAIL

Does no one actually read the articles?

Really? Would be like reading about Core i7s and how they're quad/hexa-core but with hyperthreading enabled and posting a comment: "Yeah, they also have hyperthreading!"

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Boffin

Typical Microsoft...

I bet it is their fault, they probably did an update and it bricked it. I know it is only 10% of one particular model that is affected but it is bound to have affected it... If it had been open source then it wouldn't have crashed...

Oh, sorry, the article is about a satellite? I just saw the word "crash" and went straight for the comments so I could post an ill informed rant about something I know naff all about, isn't that what the register comments section is about nowadays?

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Joke

Of course! It's so obvious!

Microsoft did it!

you can tell because it crashed straight into a Blue Sea of Death :D

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"Mishap"

Stacking a rocket and expensive satelite in to the sea once might, charitably, be described as a "Mishap". But twice surely calls for something more strongly worded...

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Quite right

It's not like this sort of thing is rocket sci-oh hold on.

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As Lady Bracknell might say...

..."To lose one Taurus XL, Orbital Sciences, may be regarded as a misfortune. To lose both looks like a job for the Mishap Investigation Board"

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Anonymous Coward

MiB

"Stacking a rocket and expensive satelite in to the sea once might, charitably, be described as a "Mishap". But twice surely calls for something more strongly worded..."

You'd think. But Fuckup Investigation Board doesn't have the initials MiB which presumably shows that somebody at NASA has a sense of humour. Sorry, humor.

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Anonymous Coward

Sabotaged by the denialists

obviously

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WTF?

Oral hygiene

Why did I first read that as "Sabotaged by the dentists"? Must be pub time, it's been a long day.

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Black Helicopters

Re: Sabotaged by the denialists ...

Obviously not - it was sabotaged by the believers before it could prove they are all talking a load of bollo**s. Just imagine all the funding they would have lost out on if the truth be known ...

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Coat

Can I get

a Climate Change conspiracy theory for anyone?

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God's way...

..of telling us there is no such thing as MMGW.

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Paris Hilton

God ?

There is but one god. St. Steve Jobs. Got it ? And he doesnt like riddles. Wtf is MMGW anyway?

Paris, cos she's god like (Godly?).

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Welcome

Just a guess but...

It is either Mini Mouse Got Wind or Man Made Global Warming... But I'm not sure, both seem plausable, it is all the cheese.

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Anonymous Coward

don't care

Don't care much about why climate change is happening, far more interested in how we intend on dealing with the aftermath. As the change is inevitable.

Why it's happening is one of those interesting things that common curiosity means I'd like to know what all the complex interactions are between all the things in our atmosphere and solar system.

However it isn't going to change the fact that the climate is going to change and we either adapt or die.

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Anonymous Coward

Good viewpoint

I agree entirely with you (although those who think that Man has changed so much about the planet to cause the problem also think that man can stop it!)

However, I would say that you are much more likely to have problems with the total collapse of the financial system first. Firstly, there is the issue of USA giving so many dollars to China to pay for things, that the dollar will almost end up worthless, and the only thing that USA can give to China to repay is all their land :) Then there is the issue that credit and interest means that there actually isn't enough money in the world to repay all the dept!

I think that little lot will cause you problems long before climate change does.

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Twonk

Drama queen.

You do realise that the chances of whole human even being mildly inconvenienced by climate change is slim right? The earth has been much hotter than this many times before and our ancestors and related species survived quite happily.

People like you who persist in painting climate changes as an Eco-pocalypse do nothing for the debate.

Try reading the Reg interview with one of the greenpeace founders from a couple of weeks ago and come back when you have something constructive to add.

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Obvious sabotage

Obvious it sabotage by the oil industry and there government insiders or by green peace have not decided which yet.

Either way we have just lost several years worth of work which would of increase our understanding and knowledge of our environment.

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Bronze badge

Try getting it right...

The fairing covering the payload wasn't jettisoned when it was supposed to be. The additional weight meant it did not reach the required altitude.

It was not "dragged down" by the stage underneath it, which was still operational and indeed essential for a successful orbital insertion.

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successful orbital insertion

FNARRR!

'I think he's attempting re-entry, Sir' - Q, Moonraker(?)

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Anonymous Coward

Someone's not going to have a good weekend.....

Oops.

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Unhappy

Recoverable?

What I want to know is if the sattelite is recoverable and if they'll try to launch it again after checking it out. Some of the reports said that contingency plans were put into effect, so perhaps they had some sort of safe recovery proceedure in place. I'm pretty sure the answer is no, but I'd like to know anyway.

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Happy

Recoverable...

To "recover" the satellite they would need a REALLY big dust pan and brush...

To put it another way, over the weekend I dropped my iPhone onto the floor of a car park and it smashed.

Now, imagine a satellite, built in a clean room to prevent the slightest trace of contamination, full of delicate instruments and made of the lightest materials posible to save launch weight. Imagine that hitting the ocean at speeds somewhat faster than my iPhone hit the floor...

No, it ain't recoverable, if is scattered all over the southern pacific ocean floor where the fish are shouting "they are shooting rockets at us again!"

P.S. Not mocking, just wanting to get in my sorrow for my trashed iPhone, still my Omnia WP7 phone is working fine, even after the update!

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Joke

It depends...

After the first time, they may have decided to paint the whole thing in marine varnish.

Yep, the one with the clinker-built satellite in the pocket.

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Boffin

Short Answer: No

Long Answer: 1) Splashed down in water thousands of feet deep; 2) Hit the water at (probably) several hundred mph and is now in little, tiny pieces; 3) Not designed to float, though some bits/pieces might, so...no.

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Bronze badge

Two? Could be just a coincidence.

Let's give NASA one more shot at launching this type of satellite.

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Anonymous Coward

Eh?

This satellite was going up to join the A Train constellation which already has a whole bunch of this type of satellite. Also, NASA wasn't doing the launch.

http://science.nasa.gov/earth-science/a-train-satellite-constellation/

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Black Helicopters

meta-conspiracy

I call conspiracy between the conspirators. Direct observations are in nobody's interest in the overheated climate debate. Superglue on the rocket top and everyone keeps their funding ! (except the rocket maker, who I do feel sorry for).

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Silver badge

Perhaps

The launch guy held the controller the wrong way.

Does anyone know if Apple made it?

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FAIL

Unfortunately, it isn't just Glory that failed.....

The Amateur Radio satellites Explorer-1, KySat-1 and Hermes were all lost too as they were piggy-backing on the launch.

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FAIL

ok...

Who's turn is it to call the Wildfire Alert this time...?

Probably a case of explosive bolts that didnt - but if you see any green/purple flecks - you're probably already dead...

Have a nice day ya'all...

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FAIL

Send it through India

A lot of them are doing it now. They would do it better and cheaper.

Who can forget the fiasco about the Mars lander, when ultimately, it was found to be a simple calculation error between two systems of measurement - Miles and Kilometers and the whole system went Kaput ?

Im impressed with them - again.

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FAIL

Better than the Russians!

America always has to be better than the Russians!

A couple of Russians were fired, and Roscosmos (Russian equivalent to NASA or ESA) got a right earful when they lost a rocket with a couple of navigation satellites.

But to do it TWICE ! ?

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Boffin

Not looking good for Orbital Science Corp and the Cre Dev contract

2 attempted launches, 2 fails.

Note this is the *old* Taurus launcher they know *how* to build and operate (but haven't very often).

Not the new hotness with the Russian built (and probably designed) liquid fueled first stage with the engines they picked up off ATK when RPKistler went down the pan along with the cash left from the NASA contract with RPKistler.

OTOH

OSC have been smoozing NASA for about another $300m for a "Risk reduction" flight.

This would suggest they need it.

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