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back to article Ten... fantasy swords you wish you owned

At Reg Hardware, with the honorable exception of videogames, we tend to talk up tools that generally assist in everyday life. Today, though, we're going to break tradition altogether and run through some weaponry. Well, bladed replicas to be precise. If you've ever fancied yourself as a modern-day knight - Jedi or Dunedain - or …

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Anonymous Coward

What no Chainsword?

Guess GW is protecting its "rights" as hevily as ever.

As an aside my son made his own Wolverine claws at school - 8 lollipop sticks and a piece of sellotape.

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Well most interesting blades are missing

Yeah right.

The greatest fantasy blade list without Greyswandir on it.

My coat. The one with the suspicious scabbard under it.

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Go

Only and Idiot ...

... brings a knife to a Glock fight.

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Who ?

Who's Only ?

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Stormbringer commin', time to die...

Aye, no a bad list like, but me, I'd go for Raven Armory's Stormbringer

http://www.raven-armoury.co.uk/

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ooh!

Love the special edition with Mournblade as well! The price however...

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FAIL

Fail

Sorry, you missed both of the fantasy swords I'd want to own AND included Wolverine's claws which aren't a sword.

Of the two swords that should have been here, you missed the Japanese blade with the steel folded two hundred times, as wielded by Juan-Sachez Villalobos Ramirez, and taken by Connor Macleod after his death - in Highlander (1986), and the blade made for the six-fingered Count Rugen by Domingo Montoya, and wielded by his son Inigo in a twenty year quest for revenge - in The Princess Bride (1987)

Most of the blades here, pfft, are imitators.

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inconceivable!

http://verydemotivational.files.wordpress.com/2010/03/129140430820168303.jpg

ttfn

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Princess Bride

Definitely the sword from The Princess Bride... definitely.

Perhaps the Master Sword from Ocarina of Time :D

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Connor MacLeod's katana

^ This.

Some of my choices would have been: Hanzo Sword. Glamdring. Those gladii in the film "Gladiator". Err.. um... Frostmourne.. (Hey, it's less embarrassing than a light sabre).

Interesting article nevertheless.

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Stop

"Wolverine's claws which aren't a sword"

How are they not swords? Because they pierce, like a floret?

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WTF?

well,

Because they are CLAWS. Raptors didn't have swords and neither does Wolverine. He doesn't hold them, they grow from his hands.

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Coat

Klingon Sword material

Good job they didn't make it from baakelite...

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two that are made

to replace two none swords good as they are Riddick: Saber Clawsand Wolverine's Claw

http://www.historicalfencing.org/Macdonaldarmory/montoya.htm

http://www.historicalfencing.org/Macdonaldarmory/toledosalamanca.htm

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FAIL

and what of the Green Destiny?

Surely - good sir - surely, it warrants a prize place in any list?

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Grenade

Swords

I hate to be horrid, but acquiring replica "fantasy" swords is dangerous, possible illegal, and massively massively massively uncool. Nerds no longer need this kind of thing. They rule the real world now, they don't have to fantasize about ruling fantasy worlds.

And Prof Tolkien wouldn't like it either.

If you feel a fantasy weapon coming on, get down to the local rowing/running/football/rugby club and exercise until the feeling goes away.

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Horrid.

^ Fails to see the point.

Dangerous. Tick.

Probably Illegal. Tick (here anyways, without a permit)

Massively, massively uncool? Bzzzzt... WRONG.

Horrid you are? I'll leave the bleeding obvious. :P

BTW, the standard way a nerd would deal with a fantasy weapon coming on would probably be to go get a box of tissues and prawn....

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Pirate

spoilsport

perhaps you'd rather we all carried sakabatos...

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So let me think about this...

...I go to someone's house, and they have a sword hanging on the wall.

"That's interesting", says I. "What is it?"

"Ah, that's a replica of Aragorn's sword from Lord of the Rings"

"So it's a replica of an imaginary sword owned by an imaginary hero from an imaginary place, right?"

"Er - yes. But it's really cool."

Riiiight. I'm with the original poster. Never mind the legality or the safety. Massively, massively uncool works for me.

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Two swords you wouldn't want to own

Elric of Melnibone's Stormbringer and Anomander Rake's Dragnipur deserve a mention

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Happy

Those were the ones...

That occurred to me.

Except as "must haves". :)

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Bub

Surely Nothung should have a mention?

As it was broken, and reforged by a hero seeking a ring of great power - and corruption - at least fifty years before Narsil.

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Blood and Souls...

indeed, where's Stormbringer? What's all this gaming nonsense?

@Jim 59 - I assume that's your age, you boring old sod? And as for Tolkien, he was a stuck up old Tory too.

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Unhappy

No Master Sword?

Link will have something to say about this oversight.

... or maybe not...

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Go

Agreed!

Bring on the Master Sword!

While we're at it, The Sword of Truth, and perhaps Frostmourne, even though it does have a bit of silliness to it as opposed to some of the other more-awesome blades of Warcraft....

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Coat

I have nothing to say on the matter actually

I have nothing to say on the matter actually.

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Happy

better yet...

... The sword of a thousand truths.

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what about..

Callandor.. why slice and dice when you can lay waste to entire cities

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Yes, this!

So glad at least *somebody* put this fantasy universe on the list!

I was going to state "Power-wrought heron-marked blade".

Problem with Callandor is that you have to have women help you wield it. And I'm not talking Frank Franzetta style...

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Boffin

Hrunting Hellfire!!! ...

... you've only forgotten the most famous sword in Anglo-Saxon folklore (we'll ignore the Romano-British Excalibur, shall we?)

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Two Swords I would like to own

Corwin of Amber's Grayswandir or Ichigo Kurasaki's Zangetsu

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Emos don't count?

But it's not as if they have souls. . .

BTW, I look forward to the roundup up of the ten best tactical nuclear weapons.

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Davy Crockett #1

Not because it's the most feasible to use, but because you just can't beat the awesome.

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Alternatives

For an axe, Snaga the Sender, as wielded by Druss the Legend.

And of course, Stormbringer.

Both by Raven Armoury, for the cost of whichever arm you don't want to hold it in.

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Grenade

Halo

What about those thingies from halo?

PS - I'm expecting The Daily Mail anti-knife/gun brigade to crash this forum with their unique sense of outrage in 3...2...1....

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Where is Naomi Campbell's hardened-edge cellphone?

I'm told that Flavio Briatore used to collect martial arts paraphernalia, and once, while still stepping out with Naomi Campbell, he showed her his favourite antique shuriken.

Allegedly, she examined it closely before asking where one inserted the SIM card.

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Good one

but you ain't foolin' me. Naomi Campbell has no idea what a SIM card is.

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Happy

No Kring?

He would definitely have something to say about it!

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Two more from me

I actually own a replica of Sting from Lord of The Rings, made by the same guys that do the others. It's beautifully engraved and I'm told it glows when goblins approach. As I live in a goblin free area though I haven't had a chance to see it in action yet.

Would also give someone's right arm for a Soul Reaver from the Legacy of Kain series.

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Hawk the slayer?

No mindsword from Hawk the Slayer? :)

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Bah!

Your list fails to so much as mention Fighter's Sword-Chucks, and therefore sucks.

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Happy

Star Wars Force FX Lightsabers

I own 3 of these; original Luke ep VI which is the only one of the range lit by EL paper, Luke ep IV and Darth ep IV.

I don't mind admitting I'm a complete geek when it comes to these things, and I can't swordfight to save my life but they're just too cool, when I show people them they are also similarly impressed with the look, weight, sounds and the glow of the blades.

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Pirate

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em

Not exactly fantasy, but Sharpe's cavalry sword and Harper's 7 barreled gun.

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Anonymous Coward

Fictional/historical firearms.....

If we're looking down this route, how about the lasers from the early series of Blake's 7? Kind of like a torch on a phone cord.

Everyone tends to look at reproduction Phasers, but what about the more obscure. A PPG from Babylon 5, or maybe Scaramanga's Golden Gun.....

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Happy

re: If you can't beat 'em, join 'em

I'd forgotten about those. Time to clean the dust of those books.

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FAIL

Worried about looking like a chump?

Then make sure you buy your sword from these guys!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_hfLZozBVpM

Then you can look JUST like them!!

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There is just one to consider ...

And that must be Stormbringer - the ultimate in evil, as wielded by one of fictions greatest anti-heroes.

Must admit I was also going to suggest some of the swords from Fred Saberhagen's Books of Swords and Books of Lost Swords series - good books and a great concept, each sword gives a boon, but also demands a bain as well for it's use.

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The important thing…about a lightsabre is

if it doesn’t come on, don’t look in the top while hitting the handle.

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Anonymous Coward

A good fantasy sword...

...is a euphemism too far.

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and this is why larp is always more fun than reality

If you don't mind it being latex (and thus not having any shred of illegality about it) you can get a chainsword: http://www.artyfakes.co.uk/480_256_csupload_23916146.jpg?u=3406994020

...and the geek shall inherit the earth.

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