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back to article SWAT team cuffs masked Dell flack for 'deadly' tablet promo

Dell's Round Rock, Texas headquarters was stormed by a police SWAT team on Monday after multiple 911 calls reported that a masked gunman was ordering employees into a building lobby. Round Rock's finest discovered employee Bryan Chester dressed in a biker outfit, wearing a skull mask, and carrying what callers identified as "two …

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Anonymous Coward

A "controlled panic".

Interesting euphemism.

Of course, we only hear the police's part of the story, and who have a vested interest in both bigging up the issue to show they were Doing Their Jobs and in "calming the populace", which is probably where that contradiction in terms euphemism came from. It may well be the two guys were being jackasses, but I'm not prepared to blindly take the police's word at face value, who might've overreacted instead of defused the situation like they're supposed to do first. Not assuming either way, just pointing out it could just as easily be the other way too.

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Unhappy

The best way to picture Round Rock police...

...would be to watch this Big Lebowski excerpt: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qcMwpWIRQp4

Anyone from Austin, or for that matter, anyone who's ever passed through Round Rock on the way to Austin, or for that matter, anyone who's ever even looked at Round Rock through a high powered space telescope, knows that its city government and city services - eg, the police - take themselves WAY too seriously.

If you even think of driving through Round Rock in a van that looks like it might even have once had someone smoke a joint while walking past it you will get pulled over and you will get harassed. The police there don't like any "hanky panky" in their fair city.

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Anonymous Coward

Baron

The part that caught my eye was:

A Dell spokesman called the use of a skull-mask to drive employees into the building lobby for a product intro "an unfortunate choice," and thanked the Round Rock police for responding quickly before anyone was hurt.

What was the risk of anyone being hurt (before the police arrived)?

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Bronze badge

Controlled panic

That isn't a euphemism. I think you'll find it's oxymoronic. And the police officer in this case clearly just moronic if he thinks there's such a thing as "controlled panic".

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Police clearly put employees in danger

Agreed, all the reports say "Round Rock's finest stormed the building." The police were the ones with the guns. Maybe they should be charged with deadly conduct since they were looking for someone to shoot. Poteet sounds like Round Rock's version of Barney Fife.

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FAIL

Misdemeanor Deadly Conduct.

Only in America.

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FAIL

What it means

The charge means "acting in such a way as to cause someone to possibly get killed". In this case, acting like such a clueless boob that a SWAT team was dispatched. Not being satisfied, the boob then fails to follow instructions and, for a time, causes the team to think said boob posed a deadly threat.

He won't get more than probation, more likely just a fine and a stern warning from the bench. Usually people this dumb simply get shot.

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FAIL

But nobody was killed.

So how the hell was it deadly conduct?

But thats beside the point, I was commenting on how the charge has a ridiculously over the top name for a misdemeanour.

Which is typical American overkill

Icon, irony appreciation fail.

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Alert

If you're gonna be dumb you gotta be tough

Rik has a point. Texas has a concealed carry permit and it's entirely possible one or more employees would be packing. After what happened to the congresswoman in Arizona last month, pulling a stunt that makes people think they're under threat is what's known as a "bad-Idea", or "Darwin award bait". Lord knows if some moron in a ski mask started acting in a manner that convinced me my life was in danger I wouldn't hesitate to put him down.

For the AC above, when a SWAT (Special Weapons and Tactics) team shows up and tells you to drop whatever you're holding and lie down, do it. These cats aren't called to a scene unless it's likely there will be shooting involved so they're a little amped. It's what keeps them alive when they're kicking down the door of a meth lab with someone probably carrying an automatic weapon inside. There's no mistaking a team for regular cops, they're carrying automatic rifles (eg. M16A2). So if you're foolish enough to think there's another option to compliance with instructions, it's your lookout. Only, keep one thing in mind. SWAT teams typically aren't issued "less lethal" devices such as pepper spray or tazers. The fact this guy was ONLY arrested after non-compliance shows the team exhibited great restraint.

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Joke

Wait, One of them had a boxcutter

They'll never get out of prison, and the police chief will get a raise.

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Welcome

Let me get this straight....

Interfereing with deadly conduct is a crime in Texas??

Outstanding!! If I ever decide to go mad scientist, I know where to relocate to!!!

Today Plano--tomorrow, THE WORLD!!!!! Muahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!

Welcome mat, because y'all (making the linguistic transition to Texas already) will be putting that out for me in 10 years or so....

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luck

The guy is lucky he didn't get .308 round to the head. I'm surprised they didn't hit them with much charges .

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.308

Nah, more likely a 9mm from a MP5 or a 5.54 NATO round from an M16.

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Terminator

biker outfit, skull mask, "two metallic objects"

Pictures or it didn't happen!

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Thumb Up

Title required

An armed tactical unit for attempting to sell Dell equipment. Sounds like an appropriate reponse to me

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Who

do the Dell guys think they are... Apple?

(Remember Gizmodo and so forth.)

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Hopefully charges can be decided within 90 days...

Next time, clearly; order employees into -all- lobbies (restroom lobbies, etc.) wearing a wookie mask, carrying ceramic tea sets, while doing parkour.

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If you ask me, they should get promotions

Think about it - now there are 2051923 web sites which are mentioning the NEW DELL STREAK TABLET! They were branding the DELL STREAK TABLET! ...and they were *brandishing* the DELL STREAK TABLET!!

It's brilliant!

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Silver badge

Better publicity than Dell could buy

Just look at the coverage of this event ... following the Texas Plod intervention.

Seems they have some law that fits anything in the U.S. - except Wikileaks!

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Anonymous Coward

What was the tagline?

Dell Tablet, so enviable that your wife and kids will get raped and murdered?

"carrying what callers identified as "two metallic objects."

Police: what are they holding?

Caller: I don't know, it's too far to identify it. But it's got a forged steel part (mostly cementite), riveted to a cast aluminium part with high silicon content and anodised coating, with what is clearly few nickel plated inserts, and stainless steel 304 screws.

For the record: because it shines doesn't mean it's metal, and vice versa. Alternatively:

Police: what are they holding?

Caller: I don't know, but it's plastic.

Police: oh, it's ok then.

*Sound of Glock pistol firing shots*

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Only one thing I can say to this

Playmobil or it didn't happen

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Pint

It's 'flak' ...

... from the word Fliegerabwehrkanone, meaning AA gun.

Captain Pedantic signing off!

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FAIL

it's "flack"

noun, "one who provides publicity"

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Megaphone

Charge Police with Deadly Conduct

Another commentor posted:

A Dell spokesman called the use of a skull-mask to drive employees into the building lobby for a product intro "an unfortunate choice," and thanked the Round Rock police for responding quickly before anyone was hurt.

What was the risk of anyone being hurt (before the police arrived)?

ABSOLUTELY, all the reports state "Round Rock's finest stormed the building." and "Responded before anyone was hurt." There was no masked gunman! The employee was apparently carrying the Dell Streak product. The police should be charged with Deadly Conduct since they were the ones with the guns and looking for someone to shoot. No employees at Dell were in danger. Poteet sounds like Round Rock's version of Barney Fife.

Give the boys a raise. If it was the intend to promote the product, they did just that. Dell is now receiving national attention regarding their new Dell Streak product which is a product designed with Harley Davidson and their clients in mind. (Thus the biker clothing.)

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re .308

The .308 would be from Remington Model 600. A favorite with swat snipers in the US.

oh and by the way lots of US police dept have moved on to .40 .

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Re: .308

where I was going with that was that the snipers would probably not get to take a shot in a suspected active shooter situation within a large building; the search and destroy teams would and they're typically armed with SMGs, M16s, or tactical shotguns.

Certainly not meaning to criticise your comment.

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