back to article Italian white van man nudges sound barrier

An Italian driver faces a €165 fine and three points off his licence for impressively nudging the speed of sound in a Fiat Doblo. The white van speed merchant was clocked gunning it in the small town of Orio, west of Brindisi, in the heel of Italy's boot. Cops were somewhat surprised to record his speed as 1,230 km/h, meaning he …

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absolute rubbish

1230 kmph is 764 mph.

The maximum speed of a Fiat Doblo is 75pm, or 120 kmph.

Some idiot doesn't know how decimal points work and wrote a moronic story without doing any fact checking.

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Anonymous Coward

Moron

Has it occurred to you that this is newsworthy not because anyone believes he was doing that speed, but because the Speed Camera returned a completely incorrect speed?

That's how I read it, especially knowing how inaccurate Gatso's can be.

Perhaps you might like to check the facts before venting!

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No, really?

Who do you think actually missed the point here? Here's a clue in the "state the obvious" style you prefer; it's you.

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Look before you leap

Irony is a cruel mistress, she has such a good sense of humour and you're the joke.

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Anonymous Coward

top speed?

Nearer 110mph on a gps. Not 75.

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Re: absolute rubbish

You Sir are a genius.

You have perfected the perfect Trolling post. Deliberately missing the point and replying with a conviction that is a guarantee to ire any sensible person and yet at the same time invicting enough doubt in your understanding of the obviousness of the articles irony that you can at the same time be considered to be a genuine dolt. Of course this is the desired result and you will be healthily fed as a reward. Even if admittedly the source material is a gift to you this is still a commensurate achievement.

Bravo.

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Guiness Book of Records !!!

As the picture from a speed camera managed by state is legally considered a formal proof, I suggest he sends his fine to the Guiness Book of Records :)

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absolute bullsh!t

Fiat Doblo have a maximum speed of 120 km/h. Some idiot journalist doesn't know what decimal points mean and read 123.0km/p as 1230. The van's engine would have exploded well before it reached that speed.

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@ac

You're new here, aren't you?

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WTF?

Seriously?

Are you REALLY blaming the journo here for missing a decimal point? How about the possibility of faulty speed traps or a error at the admin side of the Police force?

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Anonymous Coward

Exploded?

Not before the tyres caught fire and the drivers eyes popped from the pressure.

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wow

Thanks for pointing that out to us.

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@Horridbloke re. you're new..

Not only is he new, somebody forgot to take the plastic sheet off his face; so he's suffering from oxygen starvation.

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Roads?

Where we're going we don't need roads

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Urh
Grenade

Actually....

Journalists are famously inept when it comes to matters mathematical. During the recent floods in Queensland there were at least a couple of hilarious numerical stuff-ups. One newspaper reported that, according to one farmer, 30,000 pigs had been swept away by flood waters. It turns out the journo had misheard the farmer saying "30 sows and pigs." A misread news wire also resulted in one TV anchor claiming that a predicted 40 meter rise in the level of a river was in fact going to be a 80 - 90 meter rise (the numbers were actually 14, 18 and 19).

I always thought good listening and comprehension skills were a prerequisite for journalism. Clearly I was wrong.

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(Written by Reg staff)

Re: Actually....

Clearly

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Go

Sounds about right

Hypothetically, if a white van man were to be behind Thrust SSC on a road, it's a fair bet that they'd be tailgating it. So yes, I can quite see this happening.

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Paris Hilton

Many years ago Top Gear proved this

back when it was a car show, Clarkson (IIRC) was testing a Lotus Esprit against a van - at a claimed 140 mph there was the van in the rear view

Of course it was Clarkson - so maybe a few fibs ;)

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Joke

Bloodhound take note..

whats taking you guys so long.. the Italians are nearly there!

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Here it is in Italian with a copy of the ticket:

http://www.quotidianodipuglia.it/articolo.php?id=137968#

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Joke

Kudos!

Well done that man!

...bet he still didn't turn up until 11:30 to fix the damn plumbing though...

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He'll get off then!?

Even without the need to call on his Godfather, he is sure to get off. If he doesn't I can see him visiting Bonneville later in the year or selling the vehicle to Fiat for a good deal more than he paid for it. Imagine, a ferrari performance white van!?

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MrT
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Perhaps he drove...

...the Fiat version of this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fif-Cy2eSoc

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Grenade

absolute absolute

Speed of irony has a maximum velocity of 2 anonymous cowards. Some idiot reader-commentards don't know what a sense of humour is and just posted silly replies.

SHEESH!

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New unit of measurement?

Irony <= 2ac but is that per hour, per minute or per second?

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Troll

Dacia Sandero lover

To feed or not to feed.. that indeed is the question.

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Alert

Just got back from Italy

I was driven to the airport on Monday by an Italian taxi driver who could certainly have broken the sound barrier all while talking on his mobile phone.

I figured the best course of action was to make sure my seatbelt was tight, sit quietly in the back and allow my wife to gently squeeze the blood out of my hand as she held it.

I have never seen so many cars with dents in them in my life.

All UK drivers you are forgiven!

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Anonymous Coward

pffft...

that's positively serene and smooth in comparison with a drive from airport to hotel in India (Chennai)

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I refuse to enoble a simple forum post!

Cars sold in Italy are "pre-accidented", the purchaser chooses the number, size and type of dent from a special options list.

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Joke

Not surprised.

It all depends what was in front of him.

Everyone knows that white panel vans are the fastest vehicles ever made by man. This is easily proved as it doesn't matter what you are driving or how fast you are going, there will inevitably be a white van right up your chuff and flashing its lights to pass.

The interesting question is what the heck was he trying to overtake at the time.....?

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Joke

what was he overtaking?

...another white van, natch.

As you say, there's nothing faster....

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Anonymous Coward

two white vans overtaking

each other around a roundabout...

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FAIL

Some kind of trolling, presumably?

Both AC comments at 13:19 GMT just don't add up... and curiously both employ the same flawed argument.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Some kind of trolling, presumably?

AC is new and doesn't understand moderator lag so on not seeing his/her comment appear immediately thinks something has gone wrong and repeats it. Timestamp is time a comment is published not the time it was written.

HTH

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Coat

White van man in Doppler gun run

C'mon Lester, you're known for good subtitles but you're missing an opportunity for a good^H^H^H pun!

What's all this about checking facts and engines exploding? Umm... you're not taking this reporting as a factual event, surely? Tell me the readers of El Reg have more common sense than /that/....

Mine's the one with a plaid effect. I call it my Reality Check (geddit?) No, oh, never mind...

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Happy

My top speed was only 533km/h, but it was for 24 solid hours...

Driving home late one night, in a borrowed, battered old ford fiesta, I was pulled up by the pigs and given a producer. At almost exactly the same time the next night, I was driving the same car home and got pulled again and given a second producer. I kept photocopies, because the first shows the mileage as 80,000 and the second as 88,000, so I have official police documentation to show that I must have been driving at a steady 333 MPH without stopping to sleep or piss for the entire 24 hours between the two pulls.

And I didn't even get any points on my licence!

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Anonymous Coward

In a Ford Fiesta

at that speed, no one bothers to stop for a piss.

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Anonymous Coward

fiesta

If I discovered that I was going at that speed in a Fiesta it would be way to late to think about /choosing/ to take a piss...

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Stop

Richard Hammond

stopped for a shit at that speed, well he probably had the shit before he stopped but you know what I mean....

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FAIL

AC Fail?

To the AC above....or the speed camera was faulty, you decide. The van's top speed isn't relevant, as most vehicles can't reach their manufacturer's stated top speed anyway.

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Anonymous Coward

Top Speed

The stated top speed of the Fiat Panda 1000S is 96mph. I can safely say that I have seen this exceeded (not by me!) by up to 10mph by a completely unmodified, 15+ year old, Fiat Panda 1000S.

It's just a matter of not caring if the car goes bang or not.

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and

If you're going downhill with a tailwind

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You're not wrong about the Panda!

I was a driver for a BMW garage in the early '90's; we had a Panda as our chase car and it would regularly do (indicated) 95mph+ on the M3 with 4 not particularly small occupants.

Other people's cars are so much fun!

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MrT
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That's how small Itallian cars should be driven...

...flat out and don't stop until the valves jump through the bonnet and dance around on top.

Fond memories of a particularly fun New Year's Day in the mid-90's hooning about in the Welsh hills 4-up in a Panda 4x4... unstoppable!

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Fastest thing on the road

Everybody who has used a motorway, or driven round town, knows that the fastest thing on the roads is a white van!

Sports car manufacturers have missed a trick, as the white colouring and boxy aerodynamics causes an exponential shift in spacetime, especially when a delivery is late.

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"especially when a delivery is late"

When the driver's late for his cuppa more like!

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Heart

So what's the mph on that vehicle?

Wow.

I wonder how long it took to get up to speed, and how large a fuel tank it had, plus what type of suspension was on the car along with the tires?

And when can we get these in the US?

I bet I could sell a fleet to FedEx and then to all of those Pizza Hut delivery guys who have to get the pizza there in 30 mins or less.

PS. Do I really need to add the <sarcasm> tags? :-P

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1230kph? Pah.

That is nothing compared to the speeds of twunts in their BMWs and Audis in the outside lane of the M25 most days.

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min

so plod everywhere...

...are finding these rampant speeders with their Jedi-like powers of concentration and control.

http://www.trafficticketsecrets.com/best-damn-letter.html

to the AC who posted those two really dumb comments....thanks. you affirm my belief in evolution.

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FAIL

Since when....

... was La Repubblica a Spanish laguage newspaper?

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