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A French woman was set upon by a herd of wild pigs on Monday, only escaping from them by clambering up a tree, from which she was later plucked by a rescue helicopter. The woman was walking near the town of Bagnères-de-Luchon in the southwest of the country, The Telegraph reports, when she was startled by the pack of snuffling …

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Coat

Woman trapped in tree by pigs

I expect she was an angry bird

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Joke

2 legs good, 4 legs better?

Or: Eat them b4 they eat u?

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Linux

When wild animals, go wild!!!!

It is much worse than you realize! Animals, have learnt to hide there true identities. This news just in....

Robin Hooded attacked unsuspecting banker, in his mansion. Gives money back to the tax payers!

GreekGeek :-)

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Bronze badge

Sad sign of the times

This predatory boar situation is a direct effect of the decline in the local menhir delivery trade.

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Anonymous Coward

Simple really

As we established previously, the Scottish woman was only attacked because she was foolishly wearing antlers in a region where Lidl has started stocking reindeer meat. Presumably the French woman in question was sporting tusks and curly tail.

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Anonymous Coward

Sexist pigs!

Germaine Greer was right all along.

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Pirate

But what about ...

.. the most feared of all those symbols of Christmas - The Brussel Sprout?

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Gold badge
Coat

Re: But what about.

Why don't you ask that nice Mr Assange how he feels about that Brussels construct, the EU arrest warrant he got for Christmas?

I think I'd rather have the reindeer and boars meself.....

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Thumb Up

Brussels Sproutes

Actually sprouts are the only thing coming out of Brussels that I don't mind paying for. Very tasty if picked after the first frost, cooked al-dente, and served with butter & some flaked almonds.

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Add Pheasant ...

Typical porcine behaviour; boar are viscious buggers when they're defending their young.

Still to add to you list: pheasants...

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1257522/?page=1

This is from a memorable Xmas special BMJ issue (1987); they used to reserve their strangest articles for the holiday period.

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Shocking situation

I can sympathise with this woman.

I've had many occasions when I've tried unsuccessfully to get away from some terrible bores in France, and I can tell you it drove me wild.

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Silver badge
Black Helicopters

Revenge of the Christmas animals?

Back in the late 80's, a local radio station would do a radio play thingy called "El Pavo Asesino" (The Killer Turkey), who is fed up with humans eating turkey on Xmas and decides to feed on humans this Christmas Eve.

Could it be that the next killer animal will be that infamous 'John Blood Turkey'?

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Ils sont fou, ces Savoyards.

Maybe it heard about the calf pinched by two drunks leaving a disco at the weekend:

http://www.ledauphine.com/haute-savoie/2010/12/06/emeches-les-deux-fetards-volent-un-veau-et-le-ramenent-chez-eux-pour-la-nuit

They woke up the next morning wondering why there was a calf in their apartment, having forgotten that on leaving the disco they put their new "pet", lifted from a nearby farm, into their car and took it home.

Solution? They dropped it off at the nearest animal shelter (RSPCA-equivalent). Then went home to clean, I suppose...

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Pint

This says more

About the quality of French totty than anything else. Or perhaps something to do with the availability of properly made kebabs in that area of the country. Or possibly both ..?

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Silver badge

Why the cost of the chopper?

A couple cheap bullets & it'd be bacon sarnies all 'round, after suitable curing time! I almost always have various bits of wild boar[1][2] in the deep-freeze and hanging, smoked and/or salted ... them boys is seriously good eating.

[1] Actually a cross between European wild boar & domestic pigs, although they look more like the wild varietal than domestic ... Released for hunting purposes in the late 1880s, they have become a major pest in some parts of the mountains of central California.

[2] I don't hunt anymore ... Killing wild pigs is varminting, not hunting. Doesn't mean I can't eat 'em after I shoot 'em, though ;-)

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On the first day of Christmas,

my true love sent to me

A crazed reindeer in a pear tree.

On the second day of Christmas,

my true love sent to me

Two snuffling Gallic boars

And a crazed reindeer in a pear tree.

On the third day of Christmas,

my true love sent to me

A three-strong gang of deer

Two snuffling Gallic boars

And a crazed reindeer in a pear tree.

TBC

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Happy

Of course

We all know that all of Gaul was conquered, apart from one small herd still holding out against the invaders.

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Oh La La

Nous voulons playmobil des sangliers et les Français Lady s'il vous plaît, avec un hélicoptère français et des gendarmes.

Les verrats peuvent être très importants, causant de grands dommages à votre voiture, il est donc préférable de conduire dans le pays sur un tracteur.

Les sangliers sont très savoureux, si un peu poilue!

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Viens Obelix!

On va chasser les sangliers!!

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Bronze badge
Happy

These Gauls are Mad

Personally, I thought the article was something of a boar...

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Obligatory Pratchett quote

This wasn't the little piggy that went to market, or the little piggy that stayed at home. It would be quite hard to imagine what kind of foot would have a piggy like this, but it would probably be the kind that also had hair and scales and toenails like cashew nuts.

This piggy was the size of a pony. This piggy had tusks. And it wasn't pink. It was a blue-black colour and covered with sharp hair but it did have - let's be fair, thought Colon - little red piggy eyes.

This little piggy looked like the little piggy that killed the boarhounds, disembowelled the horse and ate the huntsman.

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Bronze badge
Happy

Hawheehawheehaw

Zere I was, eeenspecting my Xmas deener, when it started trying to baht ma derriere! So I ran up a tree and called for an officer of the lieaw.

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Silver badge
Coat

Daily Mail headline...

Will illegal French immigrant pigs march along Channel Tunnel and attack YOUR family?

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Anonymous Coward

Mistype

"Will illegal French immigrant pigs march along Channel Tunnel and attack YOUR family?"

Should surely be

"Illegal French immigrant pigs will march along Channel Tunnel and attack YOUR family!"

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Thumb Up

(Metaphorical) chickens

coming home to roost ?...

Henri

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Badgers

Forget the machines

We'll be killed by the Rise of the Animals before the Rise of the Machines prototype is finished.

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Big Brother

Oh noes!

Soon there's be reports about reindeer running over little old ladies all over the world!

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Not a wild animal but vaguely on theme.

"German police seize marijuana Christmas tree"

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20101208/od_afp/germanycrimedrugschristmasoffbeat_20101208170341

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boar seeks revenge at butcher's

In Koblenz, Western Germany, a boar wandered into a butcher's shop, and then trashed it in an hour-long wrecking spree.

http://www.stuff.co.nz/oddstuff/4432063/Boar-comes-out-wurst-off

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LC
Alert

Not quite Stilton cheese...

But I was once attacked by some Danish Blue when my husband decided to get creative with cheese on toast. It chased me right out of the kitchen.

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Welcome

I'm the first?

I for one welcome our new tasty animal overlords. (Sits at table with napkin and knife and fork in hands).

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Pirate

But what about ....

... that most feared of the symbols of Christmas - The Brussel Sprout?

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Badgers

"Attacked" by Boars?

I think the boars are the victim of a press smear campaign.

The article says the woman stumbled across them and then in fear of an attack got up a tree and subsequently got stuck. No word of any actual attack.

There's a joke somewhere about French surrendering at the slightest thing, but I'm not telling it.

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Pint

Robin meat

I didn't know robins were tasty - I guess they probably are but imagine there isn't much too them. Swans - I thought that was illegal...or is it just for a certain type of swan?

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Coat

Auto-correct..?

"...snuffling Gallic boars.."?

Are you *sure* you didn't mean "snuffling Gallic boors?" Who else would tree a bird whilst she takes a constitutional?

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I was once attacked by a goat

I am not making this up. It was my fault because i had disturbed the female goat with her young and the male goat (ram) with large horns came after me. He trapped me against the tree and tried to gnore me to death but i found the strenght to hold on to its horn and fight him off. I lifted him by the horns and threw him on the ground and he ran away. That was a scary moment

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Joke

were the pigs of the animal/human kind?

were the pigs of the animal/human kind?

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