Irish author Rowan Somerville has seen off former Labour spin doctor Alastair Campbell in the race to secure the Literary Review's Bad Sex in Fiction Award 2010. Somerville deservedly took the honours for excerpts from his second novel The Shape of Her, including: “Like a lepidopterist mounting a tough-skinned insect with a too …
“upturned like the nose of the loveliest nocturnal animal, sniffing the night”
That one's going to haunt me.
Is the idea leaving you cold? What would Freud make of that?
I think he must mean Sigman Froid
Amazing what Google can drag up.
A new excuse?
"I may be late dear, I've got to pin down a bug at the office - and it's a tough one"
<- “upturned like the nose of the loveliest nocturnal animal, sniffing the night”
Irish Chap ?
Says here that 'Rowan Somerville was born near the Tottenham Court Road in 1966 `,
No mention of Alan Tichmarshs 1998 winner Mr MacGregor?
"entangled in the lissome limbs of this human boa constrictor"
Why oh why...
...and here I was, thinking naively that my Ron Weasley fanfiction was disgusting!
Re: Why oh why...
Great. Do you have anything for removing vomit from keyboards?
That was the last straw.......
Throat I understand, but ear and nose? That's going too far!
On the Gender Differences in Fictional Writings Concerning Human Sexual Activity.
let me shoot that down for you
belle de jour?
A phrase for everyday conversation.
As some who works with otorhinolaryngological caverns, I have a feeling I'll be reciting that passage to a therapist one day.
"Hair razored and ordered in the shape of a swastika."
Is that Krautchan's Bernadette?
Those various excerpts remind me somewhat of Vogon poetry
Ode to a small lump of green pussy I found on my schlong one midsummer morning?
new keyboard please
Just too hilarious.
Scarred for life...
... I think I'll have my teen daughter read some of this.
I'll never have grandchildren, of course, but I won't have to wait up for her to return from a date, either.
Sadly it's restricted to fiction
otherwise Blair himself might have got the nod for the wholly unnecessary sex scenes that can be found within the pages of his memoirs.
It's your own fault
You deserve the mental anguish for having given that crook more money. Go and sit in the corner of shame.
No purchase necessary (indeed, it's strongly discouraged)
My friend works for the publisher ...
My friend works for the publisher who published this novel, she was telling me last night how she had to do a corrections session over the phone with the author, she spend 2 hours on the phone while the author asked questions like "Do yer think the nipples should be hard or erect Kelly, what do you think would work better in that passage?".
Afterwards she felt compelled to tell everyone in her office she thought she'd just had phone sex with one of the authors...
Like a lepidopterist mounting a tough-skinned insect...
sounds like the ex has got into a new relationship again
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