Time-rich boffins in the States, who have been analysing the mechanism by which cats lap up beverages for more than three years - research which included the construction of an articulated, robotic feline tongue simulator - say they have finally cracked the mysterious moggies' methods. Curiously, it seems that cats actually …
I thought I knew a lot...
...about pussy's and tongue action but I stand corrected.
you've booked the moderatrix in for therapy - she could need it when the comments on this story come in
Re: i hope
I doubt there'll be anything said that Mrs. Slocombe hasn't said already.
I've just finished re-watching every episode of AYBS and the only thing that could have made the show a tad more risque would have been if slurping was in common use at the time.
A deprived kittenhood
or depraved, with cats one never knows. Do they learn this at their mothers paw, obviously the next project for these brave scientists.
Not all cats.
Ours gets cat milk everywhere. The floor, the wall behind the bowl, the top of her head. Everywhere.
I think the article implies your cat may be retarded then :P
Maybe all cats
Does your cat also bark, wag it's tail and fetch things for you?
Doggy in disguise?
Nope, but you owe me a keyboard (Something with cherry blue switches would be nice)
Sorry to say
but I'm fairly sure that's not milk then.
so let me see... cats aim to drink the maximum per slurp? ok good plan ... and this makes them smart at hydrodynamics?? er right
I think with a thirst, a controllable tongue, a few million years of evolution (or even a few years of desiring to drink faster) they've figured out just how much to bend their tongues..
good science chaps.. now go play somewhere safe eh.
as we know, all bricks have a PhD in gravitational physics. Paper falls slowly because it is stupid.
robotic cat-lapping lingual simulator
All very well but they'll never make any commercial use out of it.
Where's the tongue in cheek icon?
Continuing the theme...
"The crafty feline allows this to fly into its mouth, so keeping its chin dry in fastidious style..."
...because no-one likes a wet pussy.
You like dry pussies?
Second day in a row that my innuendo meter explodes. Pussy-slurping and robo-trouser snake... coincidence?
Re: Oh dear
So what is the Le Reg standard unit for innuendo??
Paris - well obviously...
"So what is the Le Reg standard unit for innuendo??"
I would have thought it would be the "Lewis ratio", which is innuendo total/pages per article
Surely one high speed video of a cat drinking (as in the article) makes it perfectly clear.
Did it take him 3 years to think of videoing it?
And I thought...
And I thought it was going to be an article about oral sex.
Very disappointed I have to say.
Ah, yes, well at least most of the comments are about oral sex...
Paris because I am curious if her pussy slurps the same way too.
Any other day the headline would've been been truly snort-worthy, but I've been de-sensitised by "Crab Shack mock cock cop attack shock".
Busy Friday for the Vulture Central tabloid headline deptartment: genitalia sub-division though, & I hope Ms Moderatrix had her taco ration increased accordingly too...
That ringing noise you can hear is a thousand porn makers trying to get hold of the designs to replace their Magic Wands...
Trademark it quickly Lewis
Hands up everyone who wants to see Lewis and Lester pitch a paper and bendy straw Pussy Slurper(TM) on 'Dragons' Den'.
Beginning of the end
If they manage to manufacture this device as a sex aid for the ladies, that's us men fucked. And not in the good way...
ignobel awards submission methinks
it's becoming more popular than the original as it gets you things like Qi. now all they need is an agent to manage the appearances and the IP rights..
still, certainly pint-worthy science. lap it up lads.
My thoughts too.
You've got to love Basic Research...
Basic science research is fundamental to us understanding and emulating the real-world.
Who knows what'll come out of it.
Nice one Guys.
@Beginning of the end
Jeez... I hadn't thought of that.
I guess a protest strike with "Tongues out!" banners wouldn't really be appropriate....
Oh well, please yourselves....
I know of one pussy that could not be slurped to contentment :(
Totally pointless .....
.... but I love it when real scientists make an effort to find out how things work. Good stuff.
"This suggests that cats are smarter than many people think, at least when it comes to hydrodynamics"
Does this guy do maths before he chugs a pint ?
Is he really claiming a cat does complex hydrodynamic equations in it's brain or would it possible that the nerves in it's mouth/throat tell it when it gets a big mouthful so they learn to slurp exactly like that ? NOMNOMNOM
I’m not sure about your translation. Word doubling is the simplest linguistic device for making a plural. It should probably be ‘many stars’, ‘indeterminate number of stars’ or just ‘stars’. Like Wagga Wagga, not far from Canberra, is recorded as meaning ‘the place of many crows’. A different Aboriginal language, but the same principle.
At least it’s not the siphon article all over again. It’s definitive: Sticky things are attracted to pussies.
The Ig-Nobel prize academy will take note!
Important stuff here. Are they now going to the "end" of the matter and research the exit point and study how a cat's behind stays so clean at the moment of truth? They see to think chin cleanliness is important, so it must follow that anal cleanliness is too. Can't wait for the vid on that. Wait, yes I can ... sorry, but I can. Whatever.
You really work "hard" at this reporting, don't you?
I love science and technology but sometimes.......
I have to ask, why?
Simply, because they can...
If you only knew what was going on in a number of labs as unofficial side projects...
scientist+project+research grant = lots of toys
scientist+project+lots of toys+time = published paper
scientist+project+lots of toys+published paper = bored scientist
bored scientist+lots of toys-project = whatever the bloody hell the bored scientist likes..
or something like that.
(there is another one along the lines of;
PhD students+lots of toys+beer=two headed cats..)
At one Uni, it used to be paranormal research and investigations into things like 'healing' crystals (I kid thee not - I had to kybosh wasting lab time on researching a damn e-crystal medial diagnostic type thing presented for evaluation by an academic)
sorry, but for obvious reasons, AC
Your discrimination against dogs disgust me! I remember a year or two ago seeing a very similar thing on TV only it was a bout dogs instead of cats. They seem to drink in pretty much the same way.
You must label these type of articles with a NSWD (Not Safe Whilst Drinking) that's the second keyboard this week...
it's not funny.... it's fucking hilarious
They published it on Science!? SCIENCE!? Oh, my... It's like Nature, but Merkin. Tough to get stuff published there, in short. Bastard pussy botherers....
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