back to article Obama consults Steve Jobs on making America great again

Barack Obama called on Steve Jobs yesterday to discuss the challenges facing the US economy. According to the AP, Obama's wish list included solutions to boosting America's competitiveness and crumbling education system. Energy independence and job creation were also on the agenda. No details have emerged on what pearls of …

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Anonymous Coward

Indictments, Jail Cells

For the officials and oath breakers, that's what AMERICA wants. Problem is the TOOLS and TOOLBOX have been stolen

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No.

...Just "No."

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Bad news.

Between the Googlers that Obama has let infest the White House, and now this seeking of advice from sociopath Jobs, perhaps the conclusion that he will come to from their advice, and the lessons to be learned by studying their paths to success, is that the Constitution and Bill of Rights need to be repealed.

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Anonymous Coward

Well ...

... the constitution is an anachronism.

Will you still have it in 500000000AD? At some point, you're going to have to tear it to shreds. It's a political document, not angel scrotum.

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Joke

Energy Independence?

Mag-safe Fusion?

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Anonymous Coward

7.5% won't get you elected

7.5% of vote won't get you elected

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Black Helicopters

I thought...

...Fortress America was already a locked-in walled garden with a facist government. I thought the information was going the other way.

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Big Brother

I hate the guy but ...

... you know Jobs would make a damn good politician.

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Jobs Halo

ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOJOBS

BzzzzzzzRRRRTTttttttRRRTTttt

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Joke

Easy-peasy really

Well Mr President, (may I call you Borat - I mean Barack?)

Well Barack, the answer is easy.

All US government departments should be using Macs instead of PCs and all mobile phones should be returned and replaced with iPhones.

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Gold badge
Stop

Re: Easy-peasy really

You forgot the most important bit.

Submitting a bill in the next legislative round to ban Flash and Java.....

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Unhappy

God help us all.

Amen.

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WTF?

Ditto

There is no hope left. The guy is a clown, a nice one, but only ideas and no concept of how to execute them....just like so many empty suits in today's modern MBA world.

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FAIL

Was "empty suit"

Before the Pentagon and Treasury kindly filled it for him.

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Joke

Welp

I think Steve already knows how to create more Jobs

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Jobs Horns

I hope jobs doesn't get involved in fixing the American car industry

Then we'd have cars with a hood that can't be opened, tires, fuel, oil and windshield washer fluid would all be proprietary and you'd only be able carry approved passengers and store approved items in the trunk.

Oh and there would be only one model each year, which of course you would be expected to upgrade to if you don't want to be a social outcast.

And make sure not to grip the steering wheel the "wrong" way :)

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Gold badge

Yawn

Most cars are largely too much hassle to work on these days anyway. If the ECU dies you're left with a costly repair anyway.

You're better using the Microsoft car analogy:

http://www.computerjokes.net/172.asp

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Unhappy

My 2010 F150XLT

Has Microsoft SYNC installed and I like the hell out of it.... Voice commands, hands-free cell phone - even says my son's name correctly!

This would upset me tremendously... couldn't stand hearing Jobs' voice coming out of my speakers... "I'm sorry, please repeat command - Our records show the person you are trying to reach uses the BlackBerry system"

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Jobs Horns

Most cars are largely too much hassle to work on these days anyway

Changing oil/brake discs/ that sort of thing is hard? A quick ask around suggests that it's not that hard on the Fiesta, various BMWs, a TVR 350c or a Honda Accord.

Anyway, if the ECU dies you're left with a repair? Yes, but that's like saying "if you delete the kernel from Android it's a piece of junk!". It's not so much "working on" the car as "very technical repair work that's outside the scope of 99% of user's needs". Unlike, say, changing the battery.

Actually, we're talking Apple- so I guess if they made a car it'd have a non-replaceable battery and a stack of filters... still, at least it'd look great and have nice "Hand Apple The Power"-steering.

I'd insert the obligatory joke about Windows being a poor choice for cars 'cos it crashes all the time, but I've had Win7 running for a month or two now as a day-to-day OS and it hasn't....

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Joke

A suggestion

Jobs should say to Obama. "Build computers in your garages rather than make rap videos for You Tube".

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Coat

Turtleneck

And one more thing... Today I present a strategy that's like nothing you've ever seen before. The Political Reality Distortion Field. We've worked hard at this and it's absolutely beautiful. Stock markets will soar. The poor will be fed. Terrorists will lay down their arms when they see this sleek system. It's really amazing and it's ready today.

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Heart

Heh

The Political Reality Distortion Field? Sounds redundant.

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big problem

How will the USA handle the Nuke upgrade model which would naturally be modeled after Apple's own upgrade model of a 3-point hook shot in the trash and buy a new one. My...my...I can see the terrorists licking their chops already.

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Unhappy

Obama first ought to aim to make the US governable.

Obama first ought to aim to make the US governable.

US is so polarized politically that it seems nothing short of another Civil War will settle the matter.

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Pint

You may have notice that the last civil war was pointless

Except to shift shedloads of money and privileges to well-connected players.

I hope they just defederate peacefully before Martha Washington goes to war.

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Unhappy

Makes sense

Apples success is from controlling their users and reducing choice. Jobs and Obama sound like a perfect match.

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It could be worse

Ballmer as Secretary of State for Defense......

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Go

Chairs vs Nukes

Chairs are certainly cheaper, and far more likely to be used!

Only snag is making sure his enemies and haters (basically everyone on the planet), are within chair throwing distance.

And given his rotund dimensions, there's not many who aren't...

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Happy

Hoping there's a strategy

To benefit your average American. It would be great if Obama was talking to Jobs to see what would make American soil a better place to produce electronics than Asia. A great president may not be recognized for generations. If America had listened to Jimmy Carter with regards to energy, we wouldn't have had to go to Iraq to secure the oil.

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Big Brother

make sense

Well, US of A is the most religious country on earth. Imagine they all believe one same God - Steve, and one religion -jobstology.

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Silver badge

Why bother...

All that happens when silly presidents come to the bay area is tie up traffic (they close down BIG sections of freeways around here) and ask (beg) for money. They RARELY (if at all) ask for advise, and even rarer actually use it.

Look, if you want advise, use the modern conveniences like telephones (so last century), and possibly video conferencing. If would be so much easier. Sorry if that doesn't get you lots of glowing press reports from the lackeys in the press, but you might actually get something done and not waste time flying that nice blue plane we all pay for!

Go Home!

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Flame

Turtlenecks and flames

Is it just me, or does asking for advice from a man who products have often had flaws (maybe not in the asthetics, but dodgy aerials, overheating, exploding etc) seem to be a bad idea? Or is this why Obamas asking for advice, "Steve, you're the master of fobbing off the public, any tips?"?

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You know - it might be a good idea

For politicians to consult successful businessmen. To find out exactly how Apple came back from the dead to become one of the biggest companies on the NYSE. Steve Jobs might have the vision but he relies on a lot of highly educated people to make it happen. More of that sort of working would give American industry a real boost.

And by comparison, when the last government wanted industrial experience to form policy who did they get? Alan bloody Sugar.

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Happy

One of the US school problems are tenured reprobate teachers

There are many teachers who have achieved tenure, largely by unions obtaining school board concessions with respect to employment agreements, so they are stuck with old fashioned, out of touch teachers whose skills have atrophied over the years and are just hanging in there for the pension.

Everyone has a teacher in their past who went out of their way to help students and who lives on in the students mind. Mine was named HASLETT, who taught in a secondary school in Harrow-on-the-Hill. Possibly still really alive, but fondly remembered by many, no doubt.

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Jobs Horns

iTunes America

Forget CDs, radio and memory sticks in your car stereos in future, guys, you'll have to sync your car with iTunes to listen to anything now.

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Stop

Yeah - Right

Both the Google boys and Steve Jobs are just the folks Pres. Obama needs to consult on how to deliver what America is desperately in need of ... shovel-ready jobs.

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Jobs Horns

And Steve replied...

"Our goals do not include helping you(r people) get a good grade. Sorry.

Please leave us alone."

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Boffin

Steve Job's recommendation to Obama

Is to abandon Democracy and embrace Fascism. That is the Apple way.

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Anonymous Coward

Vaccines and eugenics

That's probably the answer.

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FAIL

Signs of desperation?

Obama is really scraping the bottom of the barrel if he seriously asked for advice from a school drop out (from Reed College of Oregon). Jobs also attended Indian Buddhist training and experimented with LSD.

He also cheated his friend Wozniak out of $2,150 when he claimed Atari only offered a $700 design prize when the amount was actually $5000.

Great choice, Obama!

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Jobs Horns

As cheats go...

...he could do a lot worse.

Anyone from the upper and lower houses for example. Or anyone on the EU gravy train. Or anyone in politics in general. Our UK politicians expenses affair shows just how honest they are. I mean, have you seen anything constructive come out of politics recently?

At least Jobs has actually done something (rebuild Apple) constructive. Though it's more a "I-built-a-deathstar-and-I-intend-to-use-it" type of success admittedly...

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Stop

Unfortunately

America's problems cannot be solved by better marketing or product image - in any case, Obama has nothing to learn on that score. His deficit is in believing that successful people - i. e., wealthy celebs, in one field - e. g., corporate moguls, speculators, snake-oil salesmen etc, have useful information to share in running the country. They don't. A country isn't a business or a market - politics may be, but ruling wisely isn't.

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Thumb Up

The meeting was SUCCESSFUL ...

... and did what it was supposed to do. Obama needs "something positive, anything" for the MSN bandwagon to simper about leading up to the 1st Saturday in November. Whatever else do you think the meeting was about? Perception trumps knowledge and facts!

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Oh I see

Don't consult the people, consult a rich man.

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Jobs Horns

Should have asked Dob Dylan

In "I shall be free"

"Well, my telephone rang it would not stop,

It's President Kennedy callin' me up.

He said, "My friend, Bob, what do we need to make the country grow?"

I said, "My friend, John, Brigitte Bardot,

Anita Ekberg,

Sophia Loren."

County will grow."

Somehow I can't see it happening this time

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FAIL

thank f*** i dont live in america..

nope, i live somewhere that is nearly but not quite as sh!t.. depending on how rich you are..

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