back to article Google data center links shot down by 'bored' riflemen

Google may have fashioned a new-age contraption that automatically relocates data stores when one of its top-secret data centers is beset by traffic or hardware snafus. But it's still struggling to protect its data centers against hunters taking pot shots at aerial fiber connections. According to Australia's IT News, Google …

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Why do fibres...

Why do fibres need an insulator?

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They don't need one...

...it is a very good way to affix them to the poles.

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FAIL

It's on an electricity pole

and power lines DO need an insulator.

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indeed... what they DON'T need...

... is inbred rednecks shooting at them for sport.

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Go

is that all?

"These guys had to cross country ski for three days,"

When i were a lad, we used to get up one hour before we went to bed............................

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and go to school

up hill... both ways!

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when is was a lad

i had to walk for hours through the snow to get to the internet... and now them young whippersnappers just click some newfangled 'mouse' contraption and they are on it...

aahh i remeber </end grandpa mode>

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You got to walk?

I had to *wait* for hours in the snow, risking hypothermia in the hope that the internet showed up long enough for me to get a good look at it as it oozed by on its slug-like trail of slime.

If you try to tell them thar young whippersnappers about 9600 baud thing-gummies and third party tcp/ip stack doohickies they still won't realize how lucky they have it.

<grabs sides of walker handles and shuffles away from keyboard, muttering bitterly>

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You had 9600?

You youngsters don't know you've been born ... I actually used (and still have somewhere) a 300 baud acoustic coupler ... now ... where's me zimmer ...

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Pint

You got the snow?

That's nothing. Living in the UK, I had to wait years for decent snow so that I could risk hypothermia in the hope that the internet showed up long enough for me get a good look at it. You try doing that at only 1200/75 Prestel dialup.

<encore bitter muttering...>

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Megaphone

300 A/C

Wasn't a TI Silent 700 thermal-paper terminal was it?

Megaphone 'cos my hearing's starting to go these days...

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You Were Lucky!

I had to write each individual bit on a piece of paper and send it by carrier pigeon.

And we couldn't afford paper. Or pigeons. Or snow.

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N2

Eeeh...

And when I got home, our Mum & Dad would run us through wi' bread knife then dance on our graves singing alleluia!

Ah, & yer tell that to the kids o' today & they dont believe you

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Pint

No, You Were Lucky!

@"a 300 baud acoustic coupler ... now ... where's me zimmer ..." & "You try doing that at only 1200/75 Prestel dialup." & "carrier pigeon"

You had a carrier pigeon!, you luckly b'stard!. You youngsters don't know how easy you had it. When I were a lad, we had to make the paper to write the letter, then if we were in a hurry, we had to send tiny Tim on one leg to walk miles knee deep in snow, just to deliver it by hand!. Our idea of a faster service was wrapping the letter around a rock to throw it at someones window!

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And the problem with the kids today

is that when you tell them they don't believe a word you say!

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WTF?

You Were Lucky!

We had to use shards of glass to etch the individual bits into the shells of snails and hope they arrived in the right order.

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Aye

An it wur still quicker than BT t'internet

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Pirate

lucky bastards

when I were a lad, we had to trudge from cave to cave for days trying to figure out which cave had the Internet drawn on its walls. All while dodging saber tooth tigers and velociraptors. We finally found the cave, only to realize a stupid cro-magnon had pranked us by smudging every other most-significant-bit on the drawing. You wouldn't think they'd be bright enough to figure that out, but they did.

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TI Silent 700 thermal-paper terminal

I used one of those to work on a PDP-11/45

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Coat

childs play... we had it rough

and we were evicted from our hole in the ground.

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Not to be pedantic, but...

...we *are* Cro-Magnon. If you want the subspecies our ancestors out-competed, try Neandertal.

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Coat

We couldn't afford titles

Pah! When I were a lad I had to chew my own socks to make paper. Then cut the paper into ribbons and punch 5 hole paper tape with a snapped off drill bit and put sprocket holes down the centre using a pin. Then I had to run sockless up to company HQ and wait in a ditch for 24 hours while the data was processed in a Ferranti Orion the size of a house (whatever a house was). After eating my shoes, I ran the fabulous line printer output back to the lab so that we could hand draw a graph of the converted results.

Youth of today..... what do they know of Extended Mercury Autocode?

Mine's the one with the 5" slide rule with magnifying cursor in the pocket.

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Coat

Bullet point.

Surely they can solve this problem with a shell script.

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Coat

You don't suppose...

that the gunmen are really Microsoft hitmen?

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Troll

I swear

I do believe I saw Larry Ellison on what I can best describe as a grassy knoll just off the main trail. At least, I think it was him, but he was in a cop uniform and left the scene soon after the last shooting.

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Coat

Laugh while you can

But when the world is invaded by hovering fiber-optic worms, only Oregon will be prepared to defend itself!

Mine's the USPS jacket.

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Fuckin' rednecks, man.

I grew up with people like 'em, and when they're "bored" (by which, of course, we mean "drunk") they will shoot at anything that looks like being both fun to shoot at, and unable to return fire. They probably won't *hit* it -- the insulator's a big fist-sized lump of glass, and the fiber's just a skinny little cable, so there you go -- but they will definitely take pot shots at it.

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Rednecks in Oregon?

You might be a redneck if you're south of the Mason/Dixon line. Can you even be a redneck where snow regularly falls in Winter?

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FAIL

RE: Fuckin' rednecks, man.

Sorry to show up your petty snobbery, but I have spent many an evening with what would be kindly termed yahoos (no, look it up, I don't mean Google's opposition), and watched the rich and well-educated indulge in all types of mindless vandalism. In particular, I have watched one group of twits shooting at the isolators on power pylons in Scotland - a hit produces a neat cloud of sparks! That particular group were of the City's finest, all from what we call Oxbridge educations and pampered families, so not a "redneck" in sight.

On the other hand, I have spent an evening around a campfire in North Texas with people you would definately label rednecks, and enjoyed a lively and humourous discussion of the finer points of American politics (some guns there but no bibles being clung to). No power lines or cables suffered as a result.

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Pint

Why hello there Captain Save-a-ho

I hear you haven't heard of a country called "Canada." We have what we call "Provinces." These are both like and unlike your states. (The levels of sovereignty they have compared to the federal government differ in many ways.) Several of these provinces contain large quantities of what you would term “Rednecks.” British Columbia, My home province of Alberta, the unendingly flat Saskatchewan, The gigantic bog that is Manitoba and I know from experience there’s quite a collection of them in Atlantic Canada.

You can most certainly then be a Redneck where the snow doth fall. I speak not here of merely metaphorical Rednecks, but actual folks whose necks are red for goodly chunks of the year from toiling in the sun all day. Canada is larger than the US, but houses less than a tenth the population. As you can imagine then, it is chalk full of farmers. From these individuals will you find both literal and metaphorical rednecks.

If you have doubts, then mosey on up here to Alberta. I’ll throw some beef on the grill, bust out the vitamin P and be happy to show you around these here parts.

For the record though, I do take some very serious objection to your characterisation of Rednecks. We aren’t all bad folk. Indeed…I think you’ll find that Rednecks can be among the kindest folk you’ll ever meet. Mayhap your stereotypes are as misinformed as your knowledge of geography, population concentration and occupational distribution.

Cheers!

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Grenade

Do you yahoooooooo?

I beg to differ. To paraphrase Jeff Foxworthy: You might be a redneck if....

...you shoot at things just for the hell of it.

I don't care if you're from Scotland, Saskatchewan, New South Wales, South Caroliina or South Yemen, or how "well-bred" you are.

I am not condemning hunting for meat or shooting at targets you've purchased to improve your "skills" (though here in Chicago teenagers with no training and guns smuggled in from down state regularly kill people with firearms, so really: how hard could it be?), but the wanton destruction of life and property because you've had a bad day (or a good day) is something my parents taught me was "wrong" well before I was old enough to hold a toy gun much less a real one.

"What do the guys say when you ask them that?" -- GI Jane to military shrink asking why she doesn't quit.

"'cause I get to blow shit up" -- GI Jane

Yup, she's a redneck!

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@W. Keith Wingate

I am sorry you had a sheltered childhood, but I can't help you with that. I /was/ raised in a culture where "shooting shit for the fun of it" is part and parcel of life here. "Because I get to blow shit up" is not only an acceptable reason for a career path, it earmarks you fro free beers as one of the lucky few if you succeed in making this goal become a reality. (For example someone who gets paid to blow up buildings/bridges/etc. For that matter, out of common courtesy, no member of the Canadian Military pays for beer in any bar I’ve been to.)

Regardless of your stereotypes or prejudices, a true Redneck wouldn’t commit wanton destruction of someone ELSE’S property. That would go against a lot of what we are raised to believe. It is one thing to do that in war, but quite another to do it for one’s own pleasure. You don’t fool around with guns excepting in a controlled environment, or while hunting with an actual expert present. (You may indeed be that expert, at which point the caution is your duty.)

Wanton destruction of property via guns or explosions in a controlled environment is a sport. It can be very cathartic. I guarantee you however that we would look down upon (and immediately report) /ANYONE/ who was taking pot-shots at another individual’s equipment, poaching, or operating a firearm in an irresponsible manner.

I don’t care what criteria you use to support your prejudice, but the reality of Rednecks and your vision of them are quite divergent. I propose that you obtain some actual firsthand experience with them. All societies have their failures and those who defy the social conventions of the culture in which they were raised.

What I can tell you is that in “Redneck culture” you are raised to respect others first and foremost. That includes the property they own. As to the wanton destruction of life…I have absolutely no idea what you are on about. I know of no Redneck that would /EVER/ consider poaching. There are a great many reasons why sustainable hunting methods need to be practiced, and we are all aware of them. There isn’t enough game for us all; this is why we have a lottery system for hunting in place. Only so many members of a given species can be taken province-wide. You apply for your tickets, and you get what you get.

If you mistakenly think that Redneck would kill an animal or human “for fun” then I respectfully submit that you shut the hell up until you have the vaguest damned clue what you are talking about. That isn’t a “Redneck” it’s a “Sociopath.” There may be “Redneck Sociopaths” but they would most certainly not be the mainstream members of the culture, nor would they be any more socially accepted than a Sociopath in any other (non-political) culture.

I think you need to watch less TV, and spend more time travelling and meeting people, sir.

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Wow. Seriously?

You're going to tell this Mississippi boy what is and isn't a redneck, you limey bastard?

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@Aaron Em?

Limey?

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Matt Bryant

Certainly appears to be, at any rate. Sorry, I forgot how crap the comment nesting is here, I should've said.

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Red Green springs to mind

nuff said

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Rednecks suck!

"I think you’ll find that Rednecks can be among the kindest folk you’ll ever meet."

Can be, but often aren't. I also live in rural Alberta, so I know exactly how full of shit you are.

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@Ned Ludd

I think that jerks exist everywhere. I live in Edmonton, but am engaged to a small town girl. I grew up on the absolute edge of the city: my community had a military base to the north, and farms in every other direction. . To the south a long ways the actual city began. I currently live in the burbs here in Edmonton. I spend a lot of time out in the bush, have a cabin out by Barrhead and get to see a lot of the province.

By an large I’ve personally found the country folk to be far more pleasant than city folk from almost anywhere. The difference between country folk and city folk even in Alberta is noticeable: the city folk are self-centered, self-focused and lacking in many common courtesies.

Still, even the city folk from Alberta are generally a far cry from V-Town or T.O. Both cities seem filled with contemptuous, snobby, elitist, entitled, self-absorbed yuppies. I find these people far, FAR more difficult to deal with than any hick I’ve ever met. My last visit to V-Town in fact involved running into some of the most blatant and over-the-top racism I have ever had the misfortune to encounter. I left that city ashamed to be of the same nationality as those folks.

I can’t speak to your experience, but in my own personal experience every time I see someone out in the bush wrecking someone else’s property, driving recklessly or otherwise doing whatever the heck they want with no regard for anyone else it’s city folk. The attitude of absolute entitlement that the younger city folk seems to be hugely at play when they head out into the bush for “fun” and cause all sorts of chaos.

The yokels on the other hand, while terribly backward in oh so many ways…they seem to have the common courtesies down pat. If I was in a spot of trouble and needed help, I’d sooner knock on the door of a farmer than random Joe from the city. The farmer would, in my experience, help first and ask questions later. The fellow from the city would wonder why it’s his problem, kick you out of the way and then drive to work whilst texting, admiring himself in the mirror and drinking his latte.

Of course, these are all stereotypes, and they can’t possibly be applied with an absolute brush. There are certainly some real scumbags in the country, and there are some real great people in the city. My point is that overall I trust the country folk to “do the right thing” far more than I would the city folk. Certainly far more than I would someone from V-Town or T.O. Yeah, the country folk might be stuck in their little religiosity of choice…and that might lead a smallish % of them to be real doucehbags. Overall though, even when you clearly don’t agree with their bit of religion, political leaning or what not…I find the rednecks ‘round here are the people to turn to.

if you really are from rural Alberta, I can only recommend you go spend some time in some of the bigger cities. V-Town, T.O., NY, LA…what have you. Spend a few weeks in each, and take public transit everywhere. Observe people. Learn from them, and see how they interact. I think that after that, you might well just look back on the quaint and backwards world of rural Alberta with some fondness. We might be stuck in the past…but at least most of us are nice people.

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WTF?

North American hunters are intillegence challenged

Many jurisdictions in North America issue hunting permits/licences that are printed on high intensity, bright orange card or cloth that are required to be wordn by hunters.

You might think these would alert animals, fortunately, they are colour blind. The orange cards are intended to alert hunters that they are not alone.

Unfortunately every year hunters shoot other hunters despite the fact that no known animal has orange fur or feathers.

In Canada bored hunters shoot road signs. The most popular of these are the ones warning of moose which are posted to alert motorists of the areas of road where moose normally/habitually cross. A moose can easily destroy a vehicle, if hit: they are also of derailing a train.

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Happy

Mooses, schmooses, try a camel!

There's an example of a moose strike here: http://www.wreckedexotics.com/newphotos/weird/weird511.shtml The website was introduced to me by a Yank who got a kick out of showing me the number of "big boys' toys" that ended up looking like crumpled foil.

In the Mid-East, the most dangerous thing you could find on the motorways was a herd of camels. If you hit a camel, even in an SUV, you just hit the the legs and then the heavy and surprisingly solid body would hit the bonnet and come through the windscreen to crush you to death. We lost a young American engineer in exactly that way in Saudi. There was a tale that one of the Saud Princes was nicknamed Lucky because he escaped death by camel when he was only sixteen. Apparently, he was going so fast in a Lotus Esprit that he passed underneath the camel before it fell on the rear of the car, missing the Prince's head by inches but totalling the Lotus.

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Joke

Better idea than orange cards!

All hunters should be required to wear a cap with antlers. The more years that they've been hunting, the more points on the fake antlers!

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Coat

actually... there are anti-hunters

hunting hunters , too , as well as the occasional drunks, or "sound-shooters". additionally, in some countries, including private preserves in the u.s. one may hunt tigers [ those are the large orange and black striped animals...] . and some animal rights activists have been known to paint harp seals and other creatures ORANGE to render them unusable commercially or as trophies......

mines the class IIIC with the extra ammo in the pockets, as i'd shoot back! :)

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FAIL

Orange animals

Tigers (stripy, but orange)

Orangutan

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Oregon

I used to live Oregon, this story doesn't surprise me. You don't go mountain biking when the shooting season begins. These outages were predictable

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Anonymous Coward

One step from Deliverance

I agree. Exceptionally high concentrations of dickheads in Oregon, even in Portland itself. The state motto should be "stupid and proud of it".

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Pirate

The title was shot...

Around here the cable would be stolen / vandalized by men looking for copper cables. They are in luck that the cable is still there.

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Fighting the Google menace

They are in fact doing us a great service.

Google is the biggest threat the Internet faces.

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Happy

Sounds like a cool job

Getting paid to go skiing, even if that happens to be carrying stuff, sounds like a cool job. (pun not intended)

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Jobs Horns

What will they say

When they find NINJA STARS embedded in the poles?

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Pirate

plural of star

but wouldn't the presence of more than one star imply that Ninja Steve had missed? I didn't think Ninja Steve ever missed?

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